How much do you push/encourage your DC?

[Lonecatwithkitten]

My DD is 9 years old year 4 described by three separate teachers in school as really very bright current at least level 5 in Maths (not test on level 6). Found recent exams 'fun' and in last set scored 100% in Maths and Science.
However, she is coasting school give grades for effort and house points. Effort scores are good, but top effort is only seen in less easy subjects (mandarin and Italian primarily). The number is house points has massively dropped off this term suggesting that they feel she is really not doing her best.
In the past I have always been encouraging and supportive, but not pushed. I just feel she is not doing herself justice. What would the rest of you do?

Talk to the school about challenging her more effectively....bumping up a grade .....additional classes?
"Cruising" in subjects almost guarantees switching off, and runs a real risk of disruptive behaviour developing.
She is obviously a very bright, nice, kid who needs a lot more stretching than she is getting.

What I failed to include earlier a sorry to drip where she is not gaining her points is extending herself out of the class (specific point on effort card).
Do I get more hardcore with homework? She just wants to get it done.
She is at a 3 - 18 school nice good school though strength in languages and humanities. I am probably going to move her to a more academically selective school whose strengths are in Maths and science.
I am afraid due to my own experiencing missing a year/grade is number 2 on my list of things never to do to my child. Also very difficult in UK particularly as she will have to stay in education till she is 18.

Actually, would agree with you on not skipping a grade .... although it does work for some. However, extension classes should be an option in the private system? more difficult in state ed.

Not extending herself outside the class could cover either personal academic study, or other involvement. Do they confirm which? .... if they have observed that she is distancing herself a little, in line with cruising, then it could be that she needs to engage more in sports or other 'social' activity.

If it is definitely a failure to stretch herself in the homework department, then perhaps its time to indulge in teaching the fun aspects of online research ...so she can surprise teachers with the nuggets she can find, and perhaps extend herself without realising it, at the same time?

It is more with the homework stuff. She does partake in other activities I have that child she is in the teams, plays recorder and clarinet, is in two choirs and an orchestra and does tap dancing. We already do some online research.

The real thing is how pushy should I be about the effort that goes into homework. I am a lone parent so struggle to know when I am being too lenient and letting her get away with it . Or whether I am being too pushy.
I think they are pushing her as much as they can in class though as I am a scientist I am able to help her with this a blew her teachers mind when she went in and told them about mitochondria and the kerbs cycle.
I just don't want to be that parent with that child. Though I do have my fingers crossed for an all rounder scholarship at the other school.

Seriously difficult with very bright children. Mine was compounded by high functioning ASD which was not diagnosed at that time. Plus I was effectively lone parenting in terms of any time or input.

If I am honest I nagged, and became very frustrated, and then had little to back me up as she was always picked up an A* on everything!! including homework which I knew had only taken her 20 minutes! The same applied to revision.
If she is getting the grades (and I would ask to see the homework grades) then I would not push any harder on homework, but would hope that the next school does recognise her qualities and stretch her more. It shouldn't be that easy for them !!
(although mine only really felt stretched when she got to finals year & dissertation!!)

Thank MumnGran she is already thinking about Uni with no input from me she is currently swinging between Maths or Physiology at Imperial. I keep reminding her she does have another 8 years before she needs to make that decision.

Does she do her 'own thing' -- have her own research and/or creative projects?
If so, she's stretching herself so that's perfectly fine. She can do what she wants at school as long as she doesn't fall behind.

Oh yes she does have her own time. She does get to watch TV too. I must emphasis all these extras are her own choice. She is currently pushing to learn piano as well, but I have said enough for the moment.

I spend most of my energies holding DD back, if I'm honest. Prone to pushing herself too hard.

But I don't think OP's query is anything to do with Giftedness, just character. I have other children who need firecrackers up bottom or gentle coaxing or bog standard encouragement. Personality not brains.