Skipping a year in Secondary

[alittleprivateforthis]

(name changed for privacy)

I need some collective brain power please. dd's school is considering suggesting that dd moves up to the next year group (she is year 7). they are having to provide separate work for her in one subject for her already. At the moment they (and we) feel that shes not emotionally ready to move up as she has been getting very upset when being provided with constructive criticism. They've noticed that although she has friends she spends a lot of time alone, so they have put the idea on hold while they observe her further.

My feelings at the moment are strongly against moving her up a year. Academically she is bright but I think that they year 8's seem so much older than her - physically as well as emotionally. I'm also not sure if it would solve the problem. She is a quick learner, so would moving her up a year solve the issue or put it off for a bit?

tbh it just makes me want to cry, I want her to be happy and thats actually all I care about. I know that her school have probably met quite a lot of kids like her, which puts them in a good position for knowing good ways to proceed and they seem to want to do their best for her, but if they are considering decisions like this I need to know if it is the right thing.

personally I would avoid skipping a year

as an august baby, it's hard socially when the majority of your class is older than you as the are allowed to do things before you are and you can feel left out

also, the older kids may not take too kindly to a younger one coming in and potentially doing better than they are

long term plans -what about when her new year leaves school and she doesn't -what's the plan?

my DD's primary wanted to skip her and I objected strongly and suddenly they have become excellent at sideways stretch with her and she seems to be getting a much broader education than her peers

I know we are in a slightly different position but my DD has just skipped Year2 and is now in the Juniors...it was the best thing we've ever done with her schooling. The change in her in immense, she is just so much happier. However, skipping her one year doesn't really close much of a gap on her academically and she is still flying through the year 4 work without batting an eyelid. Moving her up has closed the gap slightly, but it hasn't solved the academic issue. At the moment though, we aren't worried as she is so happy. This is well worth thinking about; how would a one year skip be for her academically. If they want to move your DD up, then I assume she is working more than a year ahead, so is a one year skip going to achieve anything, if not, could she stay doing differentiated work with her peers. Our LEA only skip when the child is working several years further on than age peers. Physically, our DD she is tiny, emotionally she is age appropriate but she has slotted in so well.
Like you, we will have to consider secondary a year early, you will have to think of 6th form and university a year early. We'll cross that bridge when we need to though.

I would be wary of the diffrence in size and issues such as puberty/socializing especially as you mention her size. A year advanced academically will not close the gap that much if she is very bright and make her potentially feel more uncomfortable. I hope she cheers up soon .

I just had a very good conversation with the head of g&t who phoned us back after I'd spoken to dds head of year. He said they are consulting the other heads of departments before deciding what to do. So we have time to consider before they give us their definitive recommendation - phew!

In the subject she is particularly able in, as well as giving her her own work in class, they are going to give her an open ended project to see how she flies with that. In that subject she was working at gcse level for fun when she was bored in the holidays, so skipping a year wouldnt really help.

I think that generally though she is probably just a couple of years ahead in what she is doing, which is where I'd guess a fair number of top set would be. I'd not ever though of her as being more than quite able in many subjects. It will be interesting to see what the other subject teachers say.

I think the social side is the biggest thing. She has no interest in boys or make up. She is very much her own creature - quirky and lovely but quite a loner.

Thank you very much for your thoughts - will be back later when dd is not around. back later.

I think you sound really sensible in how you are approaching this. What does your dd think?

My dh was put up a year after winning a full scholarship to a public school. He was utterly miserable most of his school years and to this day wishes he had not been put up. His happiest years were in prep school. He went on to Cambridge at 17 and from what he says it was a bit of a relief.

Another friend was at university with a few 15 year olds studying maths, a subject where the very able do seem to take GCSEs a A levels early. Many of them were also not happy and could not join in university life to the full either, no evenings in the bar, finding girl/boyfriends, staying up late.

It sounds like skipping a year is also not really going to help much either if she is so far ahead. Can the school not use their 6th form teachers to set project work, or link with a local university and get some advice?

I wouldn't do it. My Y5 DS is super-super bright, and is also a summer baby; he could easily cope academically with the work done in the year above, and would probably be top of that year too.

Socially, though, it wouldn't work in a million years. I think it's hard enough being the youngest in the class (as I was - I was small as well, so could never pretend to be older), without being more than a year behind. School keeps him very busy with extra/harder work (he has project work set for him by some of the teachers - it's a prep school, so they are pretty good at finding things to stretch bright children), he's done a GCSE in his favourite subject, and he's started to learn a third instrument. I'd find other ways to stretch her if she wants to be stretched.

I was at uni with two guys who had skipped years and ended up in Cambridge age 15-16 - in both cases it was a social disaster.
I was a year young too but had been skipped a year age 6 so I'd settled with peers, but I'm really glad for secondary I was at an isolated girls-only boarding school with lots of young-for-their-age foreign students, to protect me from having to deal with emotional and social issues I wasn't ready for.

Talking to a university sounds like a good idea, or self-study of any similar or related subject during those classes?

The early to University route does not seem a happy one........

It sounds like almost everyone is coming to the same conclusion - it could lead to her being very unhappy, not just in the short term but longer term too. I think the school are going to have to be more imaginative than just advancing her a year! Hopefully they will come to a similar conclusion.

The conversations I had did sound promising (esp compared to primary school!!!!) I think the open ended project they are giving her sounds much like some of your suggestions :)

I think I'm going to sit back for a few weeks now school wise and see what they conclude. In the mean time dd has plenty of hobbies out of school to keep her out of mischief - she, not one for hanging around getting bored.

Thanks :)

Surely the school should be able to meet her needs without needing her to move year-group? How did the primary school manage?

Primary didnt. We were told that the only way to cater for her best subject was if we supplied her with a tutor. So dd taught herself and we supplied her with direction when asked. They maintained that in most subjects she was adequately stretched, but I'm starting to doubt that.

Hopefully you are right about this school bigTilly.

thanks for all your thoughts and advice today :)

Agree with everybody else: it is the job of the school to provide suitable work for her in her current year, not to expect her to adapt to older children to save them trouble.

It was done to me
I would not wish it on ANYBODY else

I ended up retaking my A levels and was then back in kilter

My DD (now 27) skipped Year 6, which is a good one to miss, as she had been in a class of mostly Year 6s plus four Year 5s and was accepted to independent school a year early as she had done the work already. No problems and she never looked back. Did GCSEs at 15 and went to uni at 17. I think it is not too big a problem for a girl. She was always fine.

I skipped a year (what would now be year 8 I think - year 2 of secondary then) and although I kept up academically, the social disadvantage is huge at that age. Like most of the other posters I definitely wouldn't recommend it. There was a program on BBC which you can still see on iplayer at the mo about a teenage maths genius who was just doing his degree at 14. I thought that it was telling that the Oxbridge professor who met him and discussed him with his parents was recommending 'enrichment' rather than more qualifications - studying deeper rather than at a higher level.

If the g & t provision in her school isn't that great though, it might be difficult - are there any other schools in the area which would stretch her more?

As a teacher I would definitely advise against it. There should be lots they can do within her current year group to extend and enrich without taking this route - which is the EASY route for the school to take. Your DD will always be a year younger than her new classmates, which has an impact on her social life as well as how well she can join in equally in subjects like PE. She will also be most likely behind in terms of emotional development (and do you want her exposed to what an older peer group will be thinking about, talking about and learning about e.g. drugs education, sex education etc). She will finish school a year early and, depending on what she wishes to study if she decides to go to uni, she may have to wait a year before applying as some courses will not accept under-18s. If she goes to uni a year early she will be still at a social disadvatage e.g. not able to drink with classmates. I know that makes it sound like alcohol is the be-all-and-end-all of uni life, and I don't mean that, but I do believe it would lead to a continued social difference. I've taught many children advanced in this way and I have yet to see a circumstance where I felt it was the right thing. I would hate it for my own child and believe her needs should be catered for within the age-peer group, with enrichment and extension. If necessary they should look at specialist tuition within a subject but I would really, really advocate against simple advancement. There is so much breadth available in ALL of the subjects that she will study in secondary school that they can advance her learning, continue to challenge her and offer her new learning opportunities without simply bunging her up a year. I also believe many teachers would share these resevations (none of my colleagues in secondary school support this kind of advancement).

The trouble with going to university a year early is not that you must drink alcohol to socialise, but that at 17 you won't be allowed into many of the places where socialising is done, whether you choose to drink or not.