Care after possible hysterectomy - need advice

[Kathyjelly]

My Dp's daughter has been diagnosed with cervical cancer. She is very very young and he and her mum are understandably upset. She now faces either a radical trachelectomy or a hysterectomy depending on how far it has spread.

She will come home to the house I share with Dp and since both ops sound fairly major, I imagine she'll need some practical aftercare but what will that involve?

My dp is refusing to talk about it and seems to be doing the "womans problems, too much information" act which I worry is his way of pretending it isn't happening. I've read up about cervical cancer on the net but there's nothing on what I will physically need to do to care for her. I'm guessing she won't be able to drive for a while or lift anything. What about hormone fluctuations? What should I expect. I suspect the emotional side will be pretty bad too and I want to do anything I can to make it easier. I can cope if I know what to expect and am prepared but not being a blood relative, it seems I'm not told anything.

Any experience anyone?

Can't help with the emotional side I'm afraid,but I had aposterior Repair last year,and the recovery is a little similar,depending on if they do it vaginally or Abdominally.

if Vaginally,the ladies on my ward were all up and about fairly quickly as was I.Slightly stooped but walking out to toilet etc.
She will be given fairly strong painkillers,which will make her feel weak and a little out of it.Despite being tired and needing rest she should stay as mobile as possible.She will probably also have TED Stockings to stop any clots forming in her legs,so will need to keep moving for this reason.
Obviously no lifting bending etc.
Constipation can be a problem,so she should be given medication from the beginning,but if not,don't let it become an issue,get something before its a problem,although being fasted for the op,and not being mobile will affect bowel habits,so its normal not to go for a few days.
if she has an external scar/dressing,this will need checking with Practice Nurse,but otherwise,she can shower normally,and pat dry the area after 24-48 hrs,but I'm sure she'll be given specific info on discharge.
Just needs Rest, TLC, and she'll recover quite quickly.

Hi Kathyjelly, this happened to me last year. I was only 30 at the time and developed cervical cancer, finding out about it when my DD was just 4 months old. I had a hysterectomy in November.

Obviously your dp's daughter might have very different experiences from me, but I'm happy to share mine.

The operation itself is pretty major, I was in hospital for 5 days, and couldn't drive for 6 weeks. No lifting anything heavier than a kettle either. I'd echo what sawyer says about constipation - I got this a few days after getting home and the pain was agonising, much worse than just after the op. So one of the best things you could do to look after her is give her a good healthy high fibre diet and lots of fluid.

The first couple of weeks were really hard, I was so tired and couldn't do much, but after that I recovered pretty well, and by about 6 weeks later I was about 90% back to normal.

The emotional side is another thing entirely. Firstly I think I felt in a complete state of shock about the whole thing - 'this can't really be happening to me'. I found it very hard to talk about, and hard to accept help too - it felt like everything was being taken out of my control and I hated it. Since I recovered from the op I've been up and down about it, feeling OK now but I have my second check up coming up and that is making me feel a bit wobbly again. I guess that she hasn't got any children as you say she is so young, so if she has to have a hysterectomy that may be a huge blow to her. It was certainly a shock to me that my DD would be an only one - takes some coming to terms with. And there's something about losing your fertility at such a young age that is really upsetting of itself.

Bit of a ramble, sorry, it's still a bit raw to be honest but hope this helps you understsand what she might be going through.

Can I suggest the websites jostrust and hysterectomy-association.org.uk - both have forums where there's a lot of support. Jo's trust is aimed at women who have cervical cancer and their relatives. The hysterectomy association website has loads of useful info about the op, recovery and longer term.
On a personal note, I had a hyst 2 years ago and I'm relatively young (mid 30s) and you'd be surprised how quickly you can recover from such a major op.
Simple things such as an extra pillow for propping up, not having to bend, some prepped dinners are really helpful. Also peppermint tea for bloating.
If she goes for/can have the trachelectomy then that is the fertility conserving option, Jo's trust forum has some women who've had a trach who can give her an idea of what it's like.
Hope this is useful and I'm sure she'll appreciate the support.