DH facing prospect of another long and painful operation and recovery, how can I help him???

[llynnnn]

I'll try not to waffle too much....

3 years ago dh had to have an operation on his spine to remove part of the disk which was causing him severe pain, the recovery after the op took a long time and was painful in itself. All has been well now for about 18mths and he has lived a normalish life (just takes care not to lift too much/too much exercise etc)

However a couple of weeks ago it started twinging again and he is now in pain again with exactly the same symptoms as before. He has been referred back to his surgeon and we are waiting an appointment to come through.

He is so so worried and scared about the prospect of another operation, how I will cope with our 2 dd's, how work will react to him needing lots more time off, how he will miss out on so much of the dd's etc. He is on the verge of tears constantly and I can't seem to take his mind off anything or reassure him

Any tips? Any ideas of any hobbies he could busy himself with to take his mind off things (he can't sit for very long, doesn't like to read, enjoys films/tv but is bored of that now!)

Thank you for reading if you've got this far!

How about audiobooks? Most libraries have books of all kinds on CD and you can transfer them to an iPod or similar. I find there's two advantages to audiobooks: they can be a good distraction because you really have to listen carefully, and you can sit or lie down or potter about as the needs require.

I use audiobooks (fiction and non-fiction) sometimes for pleasure and sometimes to give me a focus away from my bouts of anxiety.

I've never suffered from back pain but I learned from a lengthy stint working for the local Pain Clinic how back pain takes over. In the interim, perhaps he could go back to his GP for some temporary medication to help reduce his stress levels? It is a horrible situation to be in, and being distressed about it is absolutely normal, especially as his recovery before took some time.

I hope he'll get a quick appointment with the surgeon and then have some timescale to work with.

thanks for the reply. Audiobooks are a good idea, I'll have a look in the library tomorrow, must be able to find something he would find interesting.

I hope we get the appointment through so he can ask the questions that are weighing n his mind and start to deal with it, rather than worry about all the ifs, buts and maybes

thanks again