After abortion advice please. Anyone?

[dunnoreally]

It's not easy doing this.

I had an abortion about 2 months ago. A surgical at a Marie Stoppes. It was not a positive experience, I didn't rate the care on the day at all.

So I am still loosing watery stuff, sometimes fresh red, and sometimes brown.

Twice have lost stringy stuff that looks like membrane type stuff. Not nice I know. I do feel a bit bloated and period painy some days.

Is this normal in anyone's experience? I know lots won't want to say as they won't want others to know they had one, but I can't face ringing the helpline because I am so angry with them after my experience.

I also had the mirena coil fitted so maybe that's what is causing the bleeding, but do you think they just left some bits behind?

I'm frightened.

Oh blimey poor you!

I have no stinky smells or anything, just bloated feeling and this on going discharge. Even the tummy tenderness isn't that bad, so I'm starting to think I'm imagining it all.

Thanks for the posts, I'll update when I get back. Might be Sunday or Monday though as I am on some nights into the bargain. Arse.

It is a pain you have to go back there but as there is no choice, be ready to fight back. I had two late MS, and the people who deal with you make such a difference. When I lost the second one, they were just horrible, so unkind and making me feel even more miserable.
But as you work in the health system, go there cool and determined to receive answers. They - probably - did a mistake and now have to fix it. Discharges after 8 weeks is not normal. They forgot a small piece with me as well, which added weeks of physical pain to my sadness.
Try to have the right attitude and make them feel uncomfortable. I know it is not easy , so a big HUG for you

Hope you are getting ok with going back.

Oooooo.

I'm not going. I am not. I'll go in the week. Nothing has developed or changed that hasn't been going on for weeks.

They rang this am to know if it was ok for them to tell the manager there that I was comng and I said ok, I think they thought I would want to talk about it at the same time.

But I really really don't. It will be awful going through the problems I have with their set up. I don't want to have to! It will remind me of how demeaning it was.

So I really don't want to have to do that ont he day when I'm going to be demeaned all over again do I?

I don't expect them to mind read though, so I am not angry at the suggestion. Someone else might have like to kill two birds with one stone.

Also, if a bit is left behind, I'm not angry about that either. It can happen, I was warned. So I understand that.

t's more the whole organisation and set up. There is zero confidentailty. It was liek we were all at a spa, lying about on reclining beds drinking coffee. And then another girl would come staggering out with her knickers hanging out the back of her gown and a little plastic box with her clothes in. Fucking hell!!
I was lying there sobbing and shaking, so I must have scared the crap out of those waiting to go in. I had it with no sedation, so maybe I was feeling more and therefore needed a lie down and a curtaned off area or something. I didn't dare get up incase there was blood or something, yet I had to get dressed, but I didn't dare go tot the loo. SO I just got dressed in front of 6 women I never met beofre in my life.

It doesn't seem real!

My god, dunno, that must have been utterly, utterly horrible. I'm appalled! When you're feeling up to it, are you going to make a complaint?

I had a termination and bled for a month/6 weeks. I ended up going to A & E and unfortunatly needed an ERPC (Evacuation of Retained Products of Conception). I have heard bleeding is common with a coil, but, please do get checked out.

I had a surgical abortion in November.

I'm really sorry you had such a horrible experience. I had mine done at the local NHS hospital. Whilst obviously the procedure was a difficult thing to have to have done, the staff were wonderful and it went as smoothly as it could do.

I didn't have a coil fitted, but I did bleed, just like you have described, non-stop, for 2 or 3 months. I went to my GP, who swabbed me for infection, felt my stomach, examined me internally, and prescribed me some tablets to stop the bleeding.

I didn't have an infection, and the bleeding stopped after 5 days of taking the tablets.

My first period after this was extremely heavy, but since then I'm back to normal.

It was almost like my body was confused after the pregnancy termination, didn't know how to stop bleeding on it's on.

Anyhow, just thought I'd share my story. I do think you should get checked out, but it may just be similar to what happened to me. Could you not ask to see a different doctor, one that doesnt know you?

Please consider your local family planning clinic. They can examine you/scan you/swab you/test you and they are, in my experience, utterly professional, discreet and lovely.

Thank you Celery. It sounds same as me, which is nice to hear at any rate - although not nice for you to have.

The family planning is based at the hospital, but good idea for someone in a city.

Living in the sticks makes this sort of thing very hard. Everyone knows everything. It's all so small.

I think my story is normal for them. It's just how it's done. SO I didn't get any different to anyone else. I just thought it was awful!

Dunno - your experiences are horrible. I'm so sorry you've had to go through that. I totally understand that you don't want to go back there but how about seeing your GP on Monday. It will be confidential and you may need some help. If it's the coil settling - that's fine, you can wait it out but if it's an infection you need to get it sorted before you become seriously unwell.

Quite frankly I also think you need some sort of trauma counselling. A termination is I think, distressing enough without any other complications but the feelings of invasion and humilation and sadness that you are expressing are really powerful forces and I think you need some help to get everything clear in your head.

I think I will see the GP. They are absolute stars and I'll feel comfortable there.

I'm really really glad I didn't go.

I feel a bit of a fraud complaining, after all all the other women had the same. They all seemed fine. To me it doesn't seem right, go we moan about the NHS but even they would probably give you a bed or a curtain or something. Humiliated and degraded and trivialised. I wanted to shout out that we were not on a hen do waiting for a pedicure. It was like it was no big deal. Really weird.

If you look on the website, there is a video taking through a 'journey' it shows someone after. They bring you a hot drink and some biscuits. What it doesn't show is the hospital gown with the slit up the back, the plastc box, the constant traffic in and out of other women.

Thank you for the listenng ears. It's really nice to feel understood and not have to explain why it s crap. You all seem to just get it. Thank you.

It does sound awful, and you're right, my treatment with the NHS was very different to yours. It was discreet, respectable and kind. Apart from one arsehole consultment, who I needed to see before hand.

Let us know how you get on at the GP.

I don't mean respectable, I mean respectful. I was on a ward with a bed, cubicle, curtains.

I have exactly the same problems but I can't bring myself to call them as the experience I had was awful too. While I was in the waiting area we could hear the nurses laughing and saying 'wakey wakey' time to get up. I just cried until they let me leave afterwards, I would never recommend that place to anyone

Your experience sounds horrendous and I don't blame you for not wanting to go back there, but I would recommend getting checked out. I know someone who used Marie Stopes and received good care.

Good luck and best wishes.

Go and see your GP. This is barn door general practice stuff.