Feeling like I need a wee all of the time

[PorphyrophillicPixie]

Please help me, this is ruining my life. I constantly feel like I need the toilet, even if I've just been. It's gotten to the point where I have to know where the nearest loo is anywhere I go and I start panicking if there isn't one nearby. It's ruining my life. I can't even go for a walk down to the beach anymore without working out where the loos are and the route I have to take beforehand. I can't go on buses at all and had a panic attack on the train a few weeks ago because the toilets were broken.

I was supposed to go climbing this evening but needed to take the bus to the indoor wall and ended up ditching my boyfriend at the bus stop because I started feeling really ill and was getting panicky, before I'd even stepped onto the bus! Now I've let him down hugely and let myself down as I was looking forward to going and now can't.

I've spoken to a few docs and they've all said the same thing: I have to train my bladder to go for longer. The thing is I'm fine if I'm sitting indoors or where there is a loo nearby and can go for hours, but the minute I leave the house I start feeling it. It's completely psychological and it's getting worse and I don't know what to do about it. I'm supposed to be starting a new job next week as an instructor but I have no idea how I'll be able to get around this in order to run my sessions without having panic attacks everyday

What can I do? It's controlling everything I do

HI I want to sympathise with you as I had something similar, where I needed to wee straight after I'd already been and basically felt as if I had to go all the time. Although I also had bladder pain etc - this was investigated and I never had an infection and they couldn't see anything else wrong with my bladder - doesn't make it any easier when all the symptoms are running your life.
This might sound odd but can you think back to any toilet related incidents when you were younger? As I started researching this for myself it began to make some kind of sense. I was given drugs to stop the bladder from urging to wee - this took the edge off it for me - vesicare was the name of one of the drugs. It dulls the sensation of needing to go.

I honestly think you should seek out counselling and hypnotherapy. If you think that you can train your bladder then you have to get used to it - I used to feel the bursting for a pee sensation 24 hours a day - no matter if I'd just been, so I know how psychologically difficult it can be - but it can be done. I really want to tell you to try and relax - easier said than done, I know. What I found is that if I tried to relax then holding onto the needing to go sensation became a little easier. I also had my pelvic floor checked out by physio and was given exercises to do.
How long have you had this issue for?
HTH

It started as a nervous habit when I switched schools at 12/13yo and steadily got worse over the years but this past year it has gotten to an unbearable point and suddenly became much worse to a point of it being unmanageable and has kept me pretty much house-bound

I only really found out about hyponotherapy a few weeks ago but I can't afford it and I leave next week. I really want to do it because I feel like it's my only option now. It's only this past year or so where it's gotten so bad. Before I was fine on buses as long as I could pop to the loo once I'd gotten to my destination, then I stated getting funny so started some meditative techniques which worked for a little while but now it's overwhelming. I think today was worse as I've had all day to think about the bus and I'm feeling emotonal anyway (that time of the month) so I've had all day to stew and work myself into a frenzy about it, I can usually at least get onto the bus before I start hyperventilating! (Only half joking!)

The thing is, I don't actually need to go, it purely is a psychological problem. Half the time I will go to town or whatever and not go until I actually need too or until I am about to go to an area without a loo.

It's pissing me off as I have other health problems which do affect me but I've always tried to never let them stop me, but this one does stop me. Between my knees, chest and this I get do anything anymore! Each problem is manageable on it's own but all three together screw me over, especially this stupid psychologic pee thing (

Do you know any of the other drugs you were given? My Mum is pressuring me to buy this over the counter stuff she's seen on TV but our local chemist doesn't stock it yet and my doctor doesn't want to prescribe it as he doesn't want me to become dependant on them, which is a fair point, I'm not keen on the idea either.

You could have an unstable bladder like me. I was sent to our local hospital for tests and they told me what was wrong after them. I went to see a physio for a few sessions to improve my pelvic floor but was also put on Tropsium Chloride ( also called Regurin ) and this stopped the feeling of wanting to got to the loo all the time. I've never looked back since. Thing is you get in to the habit of thinking 'I'll go to the loo just in case I do need a wee' and I found when I kept a log of going that when I was home in an afternoon I went far more often because it was a bad habit I'd got in to doing. I had to retrain myself not to do that which took a few weeks.

susue: that's exactly it! I go before I leave the house 'just in case' which I think is why it got worse in the first place, becuase I was going so often from leaving the house and now I can't leave the house because of it.

I've 'retrained' myself not to go as often a home but when faced with a bus, which has no toilets (which is why I'm usually fine on trains unless the loos are locked!) then I get panicky.

My Mum came up a few minutes ago saying she'd researched for hyponotists in my town and had found four (though they aren't on the college of hypnotists or whatever it's called list) and I'm assuming that she's happy to pay for it should I make an appointment which makes me feel both happier and guiltier (is that even a word?) as she's going to end up lending me a lot of money over the next 6-8 weeks as it is
But I'll check the list for some in the nearest big town tomorrow and call one of those to see if they can help in a session or two before I leave. Even if it's only once and it helps slightly then I can always rebook when I come home again I think.

porphy I am sure your mum wants to help you out as much as she can and won't be minding about the money - you are the most important person. Maybe get back to the Drs in the meantime and ask for a bladder calming drug - there are several out there. I only tried vesicare and one other called detrusitol, but my issues were a bit different to yours - although these drugs didn't actually cure me or help me for that matter. I just meant maybe they would help you get through. HTH and good luck

Thank you, I feel better knowing that I'm not alone in these kinds of problems! It's something that is difficult to talk about in RL. I'll try get back to the doc this week and see what happens, he has some blood test results I need to find out about anyways!

I know my Mum doesn't mind giving me money when I need it as I know I'd do the same for my kids when I have them! I just feel bad as her and my Dad are paying for a lot for me before I leave and giving me money to last the three weeks unpaid training and any time after that until my first pay check. Got to love seasonal jobs!

I'm feeling more positive about this now and will check out the hypnotist and medications tomorrow

Thank you!