I need some human comfort and sympathy please

[Dumbledoresgirl]

I have just been to the GP - was summoned there with a letter last week as a urine test I did the week before did not come back with the expected result.

It is all rather complicated to explain, but I have felt continuously ill with various symptoms of various illnesses for weeks now. And some of my symptoms actually go back years - eg my period related fatigue and sick headaches.

So now I am going to undergo a battery of tests - blood, urine, and vaginal swabs. Maybe scans.

I feel utterly drained, utterly confused as to what is wrong with me, or how many things are wrong with me to be precise. I am sick of feeling ill all the time, and sick of being the misery that I am.

I got back from the doctors this morning, had a damn good howl in the privacy of my home, made myself a cup of tea, have drunk it, but now I feel I need some human comfort and sympathy, so I am turning to MN, Please don't let me down.

well, I think it is actually a really good thing you are going to have all these tests... sounds like it is about time ! I hope you get some answers and get help to get well too... remember , your mental health can impact on how you feel physically....

i do hope you get your answers

you'll be ok.. you will!

100% agree with lulumaam. Tests are the only way to get to the bottom of it, if they are all being done together you should be able to get a diagnosis.

Yes, I know I should feel that way too Lulu, but I just KNOW that none of the tests will show anything. So where does that leave me? Stuck in this misery that is called middle age.

tests, diagnosis, treatment and then you'll stop feeling so crap. but in the interim, loads of tea and sympathy, horrible to have to be poked and prodded...

Oh yes, being prodded is awful, isn't it? I tried to be cool and casual about having a vaginal swab taken (after all, I am a good girl and attend all my smear tests, plus of course I have exposed myself to complete strangers four times giving birth) but I still quietly hurt from having a speculum stretched inside me. Can anyone reassure me it is still normal for it to hurt an hour and a half later?

it can be normal to feel a bit achey after a smear/nternal, if you are a bit tense, you can take some nurofen

if the tests don;t show anyhting, then great, there is nothing seriously wrong

a change in lifestyle or looking at alternative therapies might help

do you go to the gym or take excercise etc?

we talked on a recent thread about taking time to do nice things for yourself, do you do anything ?

improving mental health can make you feel better

am really tired and run down myself at the mo, so feel off colour, but sickly and headachey, but i know with a couple of good nights sleep , a good film , a glass of wine and maybe some nice choccy, i will feel a lot lot better!!!

you have to nurture yourself

even little things, i love tea, and have made a point, of however much i economise or budget our food shop, i have decent tea , no value tea sweepings, in a nice mug !

Thanks for the reassurance re the aching that can follow an internal Lulu. I was tense, of course, and I am sure it will go away.

I know I come across as a complete misery, but I do agree with you about treating oneself and I do practice that mini therapy often. I am fortunate in that I have a very low-pressured lifestyle and if I want to curl up in bed with a book in the middle of the day, I damn well do!

Unfortunately though, the way my health has been lately, a lot of times, the curling up with a book has not been a treat but a necessity.

And I honestly don't think it is my mental health that has caused my physical symptoms, but the other way around.

hopefully the docs will help you get to teh bottom of it, and if you are able to rest in the middle of the day, for necessity, then go for it!

How old are you? could this be menopausal or peri-meno?

PP, yes it could be peri-menopausal. I am 45 and by far and away the most common cause of my illness is linked to my periods. On top of that, I have digestive problems which is probably the result of poor mental health, and urinary tract issues which is another long term issue with me, though not one that has bothered me for years, until lately.

I have an inkling that the peri-menopause can be hell for some women but it never seems to be discussed much.

No advice but just wanted to post and offer moral support

Have EXACTLY same issues (apart from urinary tract prob) and am going through exactly the same process now

I could have written your 4th para

I'm your age too - maybe that is significant

Anyway, if I knew how to do a clever link with an image of a bunch of flowers, then I would

On the practical side:

how much sleep do you get?
how is your diet/weight?
do you do any exercise?

I need to improve my habits regarding all three of the above

Stillcounting - sympathies to you. It is horrid, isn't it? The worst bit for me is feeling like I will be left like this for the rest of my life. My only hope is something my mother told me. She said she felt awful throughout her 40s (though she was not specific about her symptoms) and then felt she had had a new lease of life when she turned 50. But even that would give me another 5 years of being so ..... well, I virtually feel incapable of living, although I know that sounds extreme. Certainly incapable of living life to the full.

I sleep well, but I have always needed a lot of sleep - probably my ideal would be 9 hours a night - so if I get less than that,yes, I feel worse.

Diet is pretty good although could be better. Weight fine, not as skinny as I used to be, but nowhere near overweight.

Exercise? no, I hate formal exercise, that is probably my worst feature. But I have big plans for the garden this year so I am hoping that will give me some exercise in the coming months.

How about you? How do you shape up?

Not terribly well!!

Working on sleep deprivation (am an owl but have a lark of a dd)

Have recently put on 12kgs and am trying to lose it (not very successfully at the mo but have had lots of gynae issues which haven't helped). Do eat fairly healthily though - portions too large though.

Exercise - ditto above - trying to power walk x3 a week. In reality it's nearer to once a week or sometimes two. Terribly anaemic so don't feel like it!! Do a 30 min brisk walk virtually every day though (school run).

I'm sure your mother is right! At least I hope so, because I haven't felt quite "well" for about 2 years. Very disappointed currently because have (reluctantly) gone back on pill to solve gynae/digestive issues and it hasn't helped to the extent that I had hoped ....

hence the other tests ...

I agree that it is particularly hard when thinking about the future ...it is so limiting ... you sound really down ... and it is particularly difficult when it's all so 'nebulous' and difficult to pin down

Here's hoping the tests lead to some concrete results for us such as thyroid or other issue that is easily treatable ...

DG, I'm sorry you feel so rotten.

I had an un dx underactive thyroid condition for years before it was picked up, so i can had sympathise. I had secondary hypothyroidism, cannot be picked up by standard gp tests (in my HT gp cannot test for t4 or t5 without consultant signing the form) had to go to endocrinologist.

Stillcounting, well done on the exercise front. It sounds better than me anyway. And maybe you can sort out the weight loss as the weather gets warmer. I always find I eat less in summer. Drink lots of water too. I know you don't share my urinary tract issues, but more water can only be good for you, nevertheless (and stops you eating).

Thank you for your sympathies LBC. The sort of thing you describe - having a condition that can't be diagnosed by simple tests - is just the sort of thing I worry about. I worry that next week all my tests will show nothing abnormal and I will be sent away and told to get on with it(again). To me, that wouldn't reassure me nothing is wrong, it would make me worry I have something harder to diagnose like you had. And so when to pester for further tests?

Sorry for delay in posting - rl intervened there for a bit.

Thanks Dumbledoresgirl although I don't think I really deserve praise atm tbh; once my diet and exercise regime becomes more consistent I'll feel better about myself - and it.

Yes, I am hoping that the arrival of spring will make a difference and that's good advice about the water. I've given up alcohol for Lent too - I now need to cut down on the black coffee too.

Let us know about your test results. The first of mine (smear test) has come back normal.

Jumping the gun a bit, but if you are NOT happy with your results, I would definitely trust your instincts and pursue it until you are satisfied. You are obviously experiencing some really debilitating symptoms and if they are stopping you from living life to the full, then they deserve thorough investigation. I know it's much easier to apply this to others than to ourselves: but you deserve to get it sorted for your OWN sake.

Also, perhaps get them to examine other angles: such as (I hate to say it) food intolerances or environmental factors. (A friend of mine found her headaches were caused by a faulty gas flue (sp?) in her chimney - a v. common problem over here.)

I live abroad, so this may not be relevant in the UK, but over here there are some 'menopause centres' that have all the relevant specialists gathered under one roof. I'm definitely going to consult one if the gp route proves unsatisfactory.

Anyway, I hope things start to improve for you soon and take strength from the fact that you are on the right path; ie trying to get to the bottom of things (no pun intended). It takes quite a lot of strength and energy to undergo all the tests and scans when you are feeling so rotten - I know - so pat yourself on the back for that - at the very least. Take it steady and hope things start to improve for you.

Stillcounting, glad to hear your smear test was normal. That is definitely one you would not want to get an abnormal result with.

Your menopause centres sound fab. I am not aware of anything like that in Britain though I could just do with one as it seems hard to find anyone who knows much about the sort of symptoms I am experiencing (though perhaps my symptoms are not to do with the menopause? I am only guessing they are).

I am feeling totally washed out today. I had my blood taken this morning (at least 8 phials!) and it took ages as my blood wasn't flowing very well for the nurse . Feeling as bad as I do today, if the blood tests turn up nothing, I am going to be quite disappointed. I have been so energyless all day. Oh, and just found out my son failed his music exam so all in all, not a day I want to repeat too soon, though I doubt my energy levels will have returned by tomorrow.

Sorry you're feeling rotten DG.

Hope the howl and the tea helped. Hope too that you get some answers and solutions very soon.

Oh sorry to hear about your ds's music exam Dumbledore - it's the extra little stresses like that that can really get you down when you are feeling rotten.

Hope you can get an early night tonight and that you feel a bit restored tomorrow.

Oh DG Sorry about your boy's exam.

As for the menopause crap, I have lots of sympathy. Mine started about 2 yrs ago - weird cycle, mood swings, sudden weight loss and then gain, stomach cramps, no energy. I am on citalopram for the mood problems and that has helped and I'm taking agnus castus for the other symptoms and it has eased things a bit.

Mum was done and dusted by about 48 so I only have 3 more years to go

Thanks all. I got 11 hours sleep last night. The headache I had all day yesterday has just about gone, but I still feel really tired. Going to take it easy (again) today and hope I can at least keep the headache at bay.

Orm, sorry to read your thread about your bad day yesterday. Hoping for the best for you. I suppose it wouldn't help the feminist cause any to claim everything was the fault of the "time of life"?

Just dropping in to say hello to you Dumbledore. Hope you managed to fight off the headache and that you are feeling a bit rested at least.

[Waves to OrmRenewed and everyone else suffering at the moment]

Thanks DG! I hadn't thought of that defence

Thanks stillcounting. I am doing ok today. Still feeling a bit vacant but who's to say that isn't the normal me?

How are you today?

Orm - good news re the insurance policy. I haven't commented on your thread because I don't know what to say, but just letting you know I have read it (and hope you can somehow get away with the MOT thing and the police but shhhh I didn't say so!)