Dementia

[2010aQuintessentialOdyssey]

It looks like my mums Dementia is progressing really rapidly.

For those who has no knowledge of me and my family: My father is paralyzed and in a wheelchair after a stroke 8 years ago. My mum has incurable cancer, high bloodpressure, and various other ailments. She is my fathers carer.

This automn her memory has gone from bad to worse, and she seems to be now unable to plan meals and shopping, she is losing track of time, dates, what is going to happen when and where, she is losing the ability to handle money, as she cannot count out the correct money anymore. She can remember that something has happened, but not the participants in the scenario, but sometimes everything will be forgotten, and she has no recollection of phonecalls, people dropping by, etc. She is also mixing up medication.

Everyday I am getting incredible phonecalls, with the strangest content. Today she phoned and asked whether I had locked myself into their house while they were asleep and put a glass containing water and raisins for my father to drink next to him, as she cannot imagine that SHE has done such a strange thing, so it must be me.

On an emotional level, I just have to deal with it. But practically? What steps do I make?

thats just it quint there ARE medicines that she can take that significantly slow down the progress of the disease. They may or may not be suitable but without a diagnosis you wont know - best of luck

Alypaly and Quint, we are quite lucky as the stroke hasn't affected her as badly as that. She is able to form most sounds in most words correctly (it was worse when she first had the stroke, but quite entertaining helping her like a child!) And she mostly makes sense, although it helps if you know what she's talking / writing about

It sounds like you are all doing / did a fantastic job at supporting your parents - do you all live nearby? We are over 200 miles away, which makes it tricky.

quint....there are medicines for alzeihmers,Aricept is the most commonly prescribed and exelon and Ebixa are others.
As soon as alzeihmers is diagnosed aricept is first line treatment and then you can progree to the others if not helping. But give them a few months to see if they will help. from memory i think Ebixa is about £50 a month and aricept 5/10mg is more expensive in england.

I hope she stays mild mannered like my mum did as it can make them very aggressive.

it is hard having to repeat things when their memory goes. My mums worst thing was asking the time every 1-2 minutes. They loose all perception of time,day,names,eating,just general order...it is a terrible disease to watch your own parent suffer and im sorry to say,it gets harder. Try to stay patient with her,its hard wehen they are repetitive ad jst help her with the photos and fnd a level of conversation that she has most memeory of..no matter how trivial.
They can get to the point where they accuse you of doing nasty things(several of the women in my mums ome said they had been dumped by their children and they sound so convincing..and beware of jekyll and hyde personality changes) I am just thankful my mum was still soft and gentle til the end...but i still remember every heartbreaking moment like it was yesterday.

Yes, luckily there are medicines, but her worry is that she is already on so much medication it might be difficult to add more to the coctail.

Have you noticed a positive effect from medication?

I am hoping she will not have changed her mind about going to the doctor after the weekend. Yesterday she was totally her usual self, I think she is worse when she is stressted. Our family has had enough stresses over the last year. My sister is going through a custody battle after her ex abducted their dd this automn, and the ss, psychiatrists, doctors are all involved, as her ex is insisting the dd is mentally ill, and anorectic, and allsorts, which she isnt. Not according to the doctors, the psychiatrists, and my sister, etc. It has taken its toll on the family. And we are struggling with getting settled here. My husband is getting arthritic pains in his arms and hands from the artic cold, my oldest son has problems with friendships, and my youngest has had a rare neuroligical side effects to pandemrix (better now luckily) but I am finding it difficult to cope with all this.

Excuse me for barging in, I'm typing on my phone too so will be concise. How would you find out whether an elderly person's confusion is just down to age (84) or whether alzheimers/dementia could be a factor?
Thank you

suwoo, I dont know! The consultant I spoke with said that they usually call it Alzheimers when people get it quite young and Dementia when older. We suspect mum has dementia, as she is 75. But, the confusion / forgetfulness can also be due to a vitamin deficiency, or sleep deprivation, or due to other medication. The visit to the doctor, and the check up at the geriatric dept at the hospital will hopefully shed some light on it. If you have concerns about an elderly relative, I think you must raise them with the doctor and take it from there.

Alzheimers type dementia and Vascular Dementia and the most common types of dementia.
Alzheimers is characterized by plaques and tangles (protein deposits) on the brain that disrupt the usual channels of communication.
Vascular dementia is caused by damage to the blood supply of the brain. Deterioration with vascular dementia tends to be stepped wth sudden deterioration/events then levelling out. The alzheimers type is a more gradual process.

The only real way to determine alzheimers is by doing a post mortem examination, but that is of no use really is it.

Health professionals can do a Mini mental status examination (MMSE) to assess thought processes which can be useful.

Every person experiences dementia differently as you have to take into account personality and life experiences that make us all different.

QS, the alzheimers society has a great website with lots of factsheets that are useful for those with dementia and for carers. I recommend you have a look as they cover just about every subject possibly related.

Dementia is kind of my specialist subject QS, contact me on facebook if you want to talk offline.

i forgot to say that the doctors can test for all sorts of other causes for confusion like urinary tract infections etc.

Dementia isn't really a normal part of getting old IMO. It's just common in old age.

DB / I will get onto you later I have to go make waffles and hot cocoa for the boys returning from toboganning down the mountain. They are going skiing later. I am ill with bad sinuses, but will sit at the lodge and sip coffee.

ahoy there, urinary tract infection can cause confusion?

My mum has been waiting for an op to tighten her urinary tract for a year! She started getting infection after infection, and has been on so much medication for this in the last year. Could that be a contributing part?

Yes, UTI's can cause confusion.
Worth mentioning to the doctor.

i'm not a doctor btw.

DB, I'm not one of your fb friends, but could I ask your advice about my nan (as above). I am friends with shiny, BoF, custy, riven and more...are you friends with them so I could find you?

Quint, sorry to barge into your thread and sorry to hear about what you are all going through.

Glad your dad was able to get through to your mum like that and I hope you have a positive outcome from the GP.

can you CAT me?
I'm not a doctor, but just am interested in Dementia and have worked in that field in the past.
My best advice would be to contact the Alzheimers society, but cat me if you like.

suwoo, not at all! I think there are lots of us here going through similar things, and if we can get support, and a listening ear, and maybe some info, then the thread is serving a good purpose for more people than just me, which is great!

Thanks Quint. DB, have cat'd you.

nevergoogle, am curious by you saying the only way to determine Alzheimers is via a PM. Have I understood that right? My mum was diagnosed via a memory test, but mostly (I think) from a CAT scan.

suwoo when my mum had vascular dementia it was like nevergoogle said. It cant be a stepped deterioration. her doc said you can have a stroke or ischaemic episode and then nothing for months or even years and then you can have a whole bunch of them within a short period of time and then the big one gets them. Its horrible to watch them deteriorate.

Urine infections and lack of hydration can cause them to go off at a tangent too. Doctors dont bother doing CT scans once they start having frequent mini strokes ,as they say there is nothing they can do. Its just age. They do have periods of seeming to get better which is weird and vey confusing ,but the urine infections affect them badly.

The patients that i have dealt with have found Aricept to help the most out of all the drugs.

Neergoogle is right ,it can only be definitely diagnosed by PM

How intriguing - so does anyone know why/ how likely it is that my mother's been misdiagnosed. She was told she has early stages Alzheimers, which is obviously terrifying for her. It's obvious she does have some form of dementia but it seems odd to give so definite a diagnosis if they can't be sure.

I'm still curious about how much forgetfullness is normal for an 84 year old and how much could be the onset of dementia/alzheimers. My mum won't have it that it could be anything and won't consider taking her to the doctors. She lives with my mum and dad so no concerns for her welfare or anything.

All my mum keeps saying is "well she is nearly 84".

Hi all..joining this thread late but wanted to say my mum is 83 and was diagnosed with multi-infarct dementia (dr's also called it alzheimers as that covers a wide range of illnesses) about 10 years ago.

There were lots of 'signs' that we missed - getting more and more angry, losing her keys, handbag, forgetting pin number etc. She had a series of mini-strokes which is probably the cause.

It's a terrible disease and I'm sorry to say it doesn't get better but the medications can greatly increase the life of the person with dementia. My mum is on Aricept and a new one called Memantine (sp?). She's also on anti-depressants but we've managed to get the docs to cut back on some of those. She still lives at home with my dad and has carers come in to help her. She's now in the late stages of dementia and sadly, is losing the will to speak and is incontinent. But she is happy and not in distress which is all i can hope for.

A few things I'd really watch for in the early stages of dementia:

• make sure they eat. You have to put the food in front of them on the plate. They cannot remember the sequence of moving from a bowl to a plate, so food should be placed in front of them ready to eat.

• Urinary tract infections are very common. My mum has had several.

• Don't ask them questions - it's too confusing. Start a sentence with a statement like 'It sure is raining out there'

• put together a book of memories - photos etc. that you can use to prompt conversations

• get them to help with small things like peeling vegetables, putting dishes away. Even if it's done badly, the person with dementia is still a human and needs to feel useful. My mum spends hours washing up and wiping the counters.

• talk to them as much as possible. One day, they won't be able to talk to you but hearing your voice is a comfort to them, even for a few minutes.

true alzhiemers is a totally different bag of worms to transient ischaemic attacks(TIA's) that take memory away due to the bleed in the brain. It is diagnosable whilst they are alive whereas alzheimers isnt.

I went to the first meeting in the support group for the relatives (children, partners) of dementia sufferers. It was nice, if you can call it that! It was reassuring to see that the behaviour my mum is displaying is quite common, and reassuring to be in a group of people who understands. We talked a bit about how it is affecting US, like lack of motivation, the worrying, the guilt, the "am I doing enough/the right thing etc, sadness, coming to terms with losing the person who was your mum, though the shell is still there.

It is a strange journey, where the traveller herself is neither aware she is on a journey, nor the journyes destination. But the travellers companion is.

It is really hard at the moment, because I still need my mum because life is shit in so many other ways just now. I have alwasy been talking to my mum about important things, but I cant talk to her about THIS.