Sterilisation: him or me?

[WigWamBam]

Since dd was born, dh has been muttering about having a vasectomy, but he's a bit of a wimp and never seems to get around to doing anything about it, so I've been wondering about me being sterilised instead.

I'm sure this has been done before, and I'll probably be told to search the archives, but I'd love to know the pros and cons of both methods of sterilisation from those people who have been there and had it done. I know it's an easier procedure for the man, but if I wait for him then I'll wait for ever.

Hiya wwb - my friend's dh has recently had it done and was terrified but afterwards said it was absolutely nothing. Apparently the scar is about a couple of millimeters if that!!

I think when it comes down to it, my dpo will get it done rather than me - after all, after two cs's i've done my bit!!

I do tend to think that I've done my bit too, but this is the man who won't even visit people in hospitals because he's such a wuss.

i feel so liberated by being sterilised

him him him! My DH had it done and he survived. I felt that I had done enough by providing him with 5 kids. When people say that I might die or divorce him and he might like a new family I ask them just how much money they think he has. lol The amount of paternity that I would claim and anyway, 5 is enough for any man (or should I say most men)

I can see all of your points, trefusis. I think I would feel similarly; I wouldn't want a "replacement" baby if anything happened to dd, and as you say, death or divorce would take a long while to get over, and I'd be way too old for anymore by then.

I do keep thinking that if anything happened to me, dh could go on and have more children with another partner if he wanted, in a way that I couldn't because of my age, and I think that needs to be a consideration too.

Lou, it's an interesting point about feeling liberated, one I hadn't thought of before.

Is it day surgery?

day surgery for me too, was back to normal after 3 days

Can I ask a very silly question? Do you still have periods after a sterilisation? (for being a ninny)

Lou33 I'm interested in why you feel liberated is it because you know that you will never have another baby (I think the 4 you have is plenty )

Yes Xena it is. Worry free sex

Thanks. I'll be 36 when I have bumplestiltskin, DH is 28. We've already decided that 1 will be enough and I'm getting older...DH says he'll have the snip, but...I don't know. Wish there was a "confused" emoticion!

The more I think about it, the more I think it would be better for me to have it. I'm very overweight though; is that likely to cause problems, does anyone know?

think they just knew i was being v sensible in being sterilised, they def didn't try and persuade me not to after having 4!

Thanks Trefusis. Snip, snip DH

Thanks, trefusis.