Relentless Days

[Chinchilla]

OK, so I am on a bit of a downer at the moment, because my pills seem to have stopped working. However, is it just me, or is being a SAHM a bit of a con? I love my ds TO BITS, but, that aside, does anyone else feel that the days are relentless, and forget the weekends?

Dh and I had a massive argument this weekend over him spending 30 minutes in a bike shop (I know, so what, miserable cow that I am!) and I felt like I should be able to have 30 minutes to myself too. It never works out that way, but I am lucky really as I get my evening class one night a week, and can go out with friends if I want to. I don't very often, or I try to do it in half terms or other holidays, when my class isn't on, as I feel that it is unfair to dh.

My dh does do a lot around the house, and he actually gets less spare time than me in reality, because he works from home, and has his lunch-hour with us. I get a break when ds is having a nap. I just feel that I didn't sign up for this constantly monotonous life. I have a brain here, and was wondering if I would feel any happier if I worked two days a week, and put ds into nursery. I know that I would not bring home much money after child care was paid for, but at least I would be 'X', rather than 'Ds's mummy' to those people.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that I am generally unhappy with life at the moment. Dh has realised this weekend how down I am, and we are going to book a holiday at Centerparcs tonight, but I can't even get excited about that.

I'll stop moaning now. Thanks for listening, and any (constructive) advice would be great.

I know what you mean about the change in lifestyle.
When I first had my DS's (now 4.5yo), I felt like someone had come along and taken my life away from me. I hate any routine, but as you can imagine, careing for twins for 11hours a day, totally alone, was just like a treadmill.I never got any family help and did not know any other Mums in our area. It was a nightmare, and it's no wonder I became depressed.
Things began to improve for me, when they were 1yo, I went back to work, 3 days a week and we moved to an area with more families around us. DH also went P/T and took over equal shares of the childcare, but as money was tight, I did not do much for me, and I was always either in work or with the boys.
It's only now that they are more independent, that I'm finally becoming my own person again, and in September they go to school full time, so I'll have two days a week free, for me !!!

So really, just hang in there it won't be for ever, and perhaps a couple of days work would help you, give you more of an identity, and change from day to day.

Chinchilla, picking up on this a bit late, but just wanted to add how much I sympathise, and agree, you need a break (and to give DH a good swift kick). Even though I'm working 3 days a week, I don't ever seem to have "me-time" - ie not working and not looking after DS (18 mths and already winding up for the terrible twos), and I am feeling a bit fed-up. And this is with the relative luxury of being able to drink my coffee uninterrupted at work/with lunch breaks free. If I didn't go to work I wouldn't get anything done! If you think going back to work would help, why not try it? But not to something too stressful - there have been some good suggestions on other threads eg HE, public sector.

Off-topic, when we first got to London, my DH (then DP) took me to almost all the bike shops within a 10 mile radius of our flat on the weekend where we would spend hrs while he looked at all the different bike bits - lovely eh?