Continued support for SPHINCTER INJURIES, FISTULAE and other CHILDBIRTH INJURIES - the Ragged Bits Thread

[Jacksmama]

Hi all,
old thread here.

Cyee started this thread in May 2008 after her op, and it's been a haven of support for so many of us who have injuries to our bits from childbirth. Especially with respect to sphincter injuries, fistulae and incontinence after childbirth, there seems to be such a lack of support for women, and the entire subject seems to be taboo. It's as if most MD's think that "a certain amount of damage is to be expected after birth and you just have to live with it". Well, that is simply not the case - and this attitude is unacceptable.

There are all kinds of Ragged Bits stories on this thread. Be aware that THERE IS NO "TMI" HERE - this is the one place where you can spill it all. If you read through the old thread, which is nearly full, you'll see that someone, somewhere, has probably experienced it - whatever it is! So don't be embarrassed or ashamed... we'll tell our poo stories if you'll tell yours.

And also - there are success stories here. Several of us who have been through the medical mill have been successfully "repaired" and are "fully functional", so to speak or even expecting again. In those cases, please join us for Pervwatch - the "after action" report for anyone who is once again venturing into marital relations!

Welcome everyone. We're sorry you had to find us, but we're glad you're here.

Wishing everyone on this thread a happy and healthy 2012.

I finally had my joint appt with the urogynae and colorectal consultants this week. It was ok - the colorectal consultant was particularly nice. He says there is sphincter damage, but - surprisingly, in his view - I have good control over it, and he thinks he would do more harm than good if he operated. Fair enough. They have offered me repair surgery for the rectocele, and they'd also rebuild my perineum at the same time, and sent me away to think about it.

It's not a straightforward choice, because I suppose in the way that no one knows what the aftermath of VB will be, there are no guarantees with this op either. It may work, and everything will be a lot better than it is, or it may not, may have to be done again, and may even end up causing a new lot of problems. Right now I don't have any scarring for example - somehow I didn't tear externally when I had DS. Arggggh. Has anyone had the repair and regretted it?

Well.... I haven't had a rectocele repair, so can't comment on that, but I have had my perineum rebuilt, and was much happier after. Sorry for the non-answer - if nothing else it will bump the thread and maybe some of our regulars will see it and offer opinions.

Happy and healthy 2012 to you too!!

Thanks Jacksmania x

Cosmicmouse-You did it! now relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!If you could find someone to talk to about the last birth,I'm sure it would help.I felt much more calm and in control with the c.sections,though.

Prancing-I had a rectocele repair and perineum rebuild(amongst other stuff!) 8 weeks ago and so far so good with regards to end result.
Just wanted to say,for me,the external scar has completely healed already and I can hardly see it now.
With regard to having surgery,the question is how bad are your symptoms and are they getting worse? It's not a fun decision to make I know.

Here's to 2012!!!!

I there, i too had a rectro vaginal fistula!!Im so hoping you are still on this site! Please join our private group on facebook, there are about 20 of us now around the world. we are like sisters and are supporting eachother through every step of the way! Its called "living with obstetric fistula"

skye

I there, i too had a rectro vaginal fistula!!Im so hoping you are still on this site! Please join our private group on facebook, there are about 20 of us now around the world. we are like sisters and are supporting eachother through every step of the way! Its called "living with obstetric fistula"

skye

l4k - I suppose that I've been living with the symptoms for so long now (DS is 4 this year) that they've almost become 'normal' until I stop and think about them, and how I have to manage my life around them. I'm going back to speak to the consultant again, and ask some more questions, but I'm about 90% certain I'm going to go ahead. How are you feeling?

Scared senseless though - I've only ever stayed in hospital when DS was born, never had a gen anaesthetic, etc. I've had one stitch in my whole life, and that was in my head!

Simplynailz, thank you for your invitation and I'm sorry you had to suffer with a fistula. I probably won't join your group, not having had a fistula, and I prefer the relative anonymity of MN, but thank you anyway, and feel free to keep posting if we can help.

Prancing - I was almost weeing myself right before my hospital admission for my first repair, and wasn't keen on having a GA (my prior experience with GA was having a broken nose fixed, and it was most unpleasant) but it was actually not a fraction as bad as I thought it would be. Please let us know when you get a surgery date so we can virtually hold your hand!

Jacksmania - sorry, but laughed in a grim way there about you almost weeing yourself. The state I'm in, almost weeing would be good! Thanks - I will be very keen on virtual hand holding!

Oh dear :o - I really didn't see what I wrote there and the pelvic floor implications :( - I should have clarified that the almost weeing was from anxiety. Although I have had the incontinent kind, too...
Hand-holding and a (((HUG))) if needed coming your way.

Hi to anyone on this thread who knows me and hi to any newbies:)
I haven't been on in ages, things are going relatively well for me - TG..
Recovering well, my wee one is 3 and a half now - scary.
Have been thinking alot recently about a sibling for ds, something i had completely ruled out. DH is even on the list for the 'snip' - poor man as if he hasn't been through enough . But just not sure what to do. Dont want any more incontinence issues, thinking of seeing a consultant to discuss it again, but i remember my colorectal consultant saying he wouldn't advise it as the weight of a pregnancy wouldn't be great etc. Obvious section, but i dont know...................

Hi i had a 3rd degree tear fistula 23 years ago , but it seems like yesterday, i was repaired in 1990 but the last few years my parts have started to break down, We do not have sex because it is too painful , i leak at the back and i make a loud noise.............
Has anyone gone back to be repaired again ????? and how did you go on ? Just the thought of going back to have it done again is driving me mad, I live in stoke on trent if anyone from that area i would love to keep incontact. Help

Hi DCMT, I think the best thing to do would be to go see another consultant and see what the state of things is currently. Then you'll know what your options are rather than guessing and longing.

Hi flatulant, I have no experience in your kind of situation :( but it sounds horrible. I can only repeat my advice to DCMT - go get it checked out and then you'll know your options. Meanwhile, we are all here to hold your hand, and if this thread becomes more active maybe some of the other regulars will come along with some useful advice for you. I'm sorry I can't help.

Thanks Jacksmania, I am thinkking of doing that before it is too late. How are you this weather? You are one of the few people i remember when i use to haunt these pages..

FLatulant - def go and see what they can do for you. but i know what you mean by hating having to go back and get something done again. I am even freaking out about going to see the colorectal consultant to have things/fingers put in places i would rather not have them. Oh the joys. must go and make an appointment..

Thanks DCMT, I'm doing really well. DS is turning 4 next month and my insides and bits are as well as they're ever going to be, which is to say, pretty good most of the time. I still have occasional pain, mostly that dragging crotch ache when I have my period, but the rest of the time, it's mostly ok.

Right now I have a serious pain in the bum though from falling on the ice skating on Friday - I feel like a cartoon figure, with stars and fireworks exploding around a painful body part :o

I am in awe of all of you guys - you are amazing. My downstairs area is not at all anywhere near back to normal 9 weeks after giving birth but I don't think I have too much to worry about having read bits of this thread. I do have a couple of questions that some of you might be able to help with and this seems to be the place to ask with nothing being tmi!

DD was back to back and whilst my labour was only 8 hours I pushed for two of those and still ended up having a ventouse delivery because they were very concerned about shoulder dystocia. I still am unsure whether or not the doctor manually turned her shoulders to deliver her or whether I just managed to push her out. There was a three or four contraction delay though between delivering her head and the rest of her. I had an episiotomy and was repaired in the delivery room. I asked how many stitches I'd had and was just told 'lots' both internal and external. I delivered the placenta normally and my notes said it was intact. I was concerned over the next few hours about how much I was bleeding and about 5 hours after delivery they removed over half a litre of blood clots from inside me. I had to have IV fluids and take iron tablets.

I was told at all my postnatal checks that scar healing well and everything looking good.

Was constipated for a few days and having a bowel movement simce then has been very painful and I always bleed, sometimes enough to make the water in the bowl bright red. I mentioned this to gp at 6 week check who gave me some cream to apply which tbh hasn't helped at all. It still hurts like hell and I still bleed.

In the last week I've discovered painful red lumps near my scar very close to my anus. The only way I can describe it is that it feels like I imagine nappy rash would feel. My lochia seemed to last forever and only recently has turned to discharge but I am still getting an awful lot of discharge, so much that my crack seems to be wet all the time. I wondered if this coupled with the cream the gp prescribed had kind of chapped the skin so mentioned it to gp when I took DD for jabs last week. She gave me hydrocortisone ointment for that so now I have two creams for a very small area really! Neither seem to be doing a great job of helping, I just feel wet and slimy down there all the time, plus I'm afraid to have a poo because it hurts so much so even though I know it'll probably be worse holding it in I still don't go when I need to. I feel like because I've seen her twice for downstairs area problems that I can't go back again but it isn't right down there and it's getting very frustrating.

Also I've noticed since giving birth that when I pass wind it sort of bubbles forwards through my vagina. Could this be a small fistula? I'd never even heard of that before I read some of this thread. I don't have any incontinence issues or anything else so is it worth mentioning this to the gp or seeing as though it's really not that bad just not bother?

Sorry for the super long post! What a way to introduce myself - sharing things with strangers that even DH doesn't know all of!

Glad to hear things are ok Jacksmania. Yes I think some things never get completely better, i still have a few niggles myself. My DS will be 4 at end of march too:-)

Somersaults - I had that bubbling thing - but mine wasn't a fistula - just badly damaged at front so wind would go in and out of the vagina when you passed wind. i have had a secondary repair - reconstruction of front area etc and now it doesn't happen. I had bowel incontinence too - but now im ok due to the surgery tg.

I was really annoyed by the way i was left at the front initally - midwives kept saying it's always a bit different after the birth, but i wasn't happy to leave it at that. I was deformed as far as i was concerned and i could never have imagined sex ever again.. One of the gynae consultants i saw, pointed out it wasn't right - misshapen etc and fixed it :)

I'd mention it to the doc - get it checked and if you're not happy - find a doctor who does help. It does require alot of 'pushing'

DCMT - maybe that's what's going on with me because nothing else seems to be anywhere near as bad as most people on this thread, it seems like a minor complaint but it's very annoying! I think I'm going to have to go back to the doc for the chapped skin and bleeding anyway, much as I don't want to go again, so I will mention it then.

So glad for you that you're much better now too :)

Somersaults, the bleeding and pain sounds like an anal fissure to me. That's like a crack or cut just on the inside of the anus and it opens up every time you have a bowel movement. I had one. It's like pooing a steak knife. They bleed bright red and it looks like a lot of blood. They're difficult to get rid of, but can eventually heal. The first thing you need to do us make your stool soft, softer, softest. I mean toothpaste consistence. I found the easiest way to achieve this was eating dried apricots. Lots and lots and lots of them. Do not take any bulking type of fibre - bran, flax seed etc. Yiu want your stool to be soft and thin but not liquidy and acid like diarrhoea. Soft. If you can get magnesium glycinate capsules (1000 mg) they will really help. I don't know if they're available in the UK (I live in Canada). And the other thing that really helped me was Traumeel cream, if you can get that. It's a homeopathic cream. It isn't actually meant to go internally but it works wonders. Apply it to your fissure (yes, goop some on your finger and stick your finger up your bum - whew - you thought no TMI here? :o) and at first it will feel like it's burning but when that subsides it'll be just a blissful warm feeling. I

As far wind out the vagina, I doubt you have a fistula, that's actually really common (the wind). The vaginal opening is still a bit stretched and different 9 weeks on and wind sort of passes from the back to the front and get stuck in the opening and then comes out. Attractive, isn't it...

As for the wetness and yuck, I'd just try to change pads and keep as dry as possible - I got a bit rashy, too, but mine turned out to be thrush from antibiotics which could be worth getting checked for.

Are you feeling ok about your labour/birth otherwise?

Oh, I forgot to mention, change your pooing position to ease pressure on the back of the anal sphincter: lean forward as far as you can and even place your hands on the floor if you can reach. If your thighs can take it, even lift you bum slightly off the toilet seat. This straightens out the sigmoid colon and allows things to pass straight out.

Jacksmania Thank you so much for your posts. Trying to poo a steak knife describes it exactly and it seems to be getting worse not better. I will probably mention it to the doc next time I go if it's no better but in the meantime I will be stocking up on dried apricots and making a trip to the pharmacist to see if I can get magnesium glycinate. Is that a stool softener? If I can't get those exact ones I could ask the pharmacist to recommend a different stool softener maybe. I don't really know where I would look for Traumeel cream though... health food shop? Chemist? I will also try changing position.

The wetness and yuck is just annoying more than anything else. The rash is still there but doesn't feel as raw as it did - it flares up if I do a lot of walking though so I think the friction bothers it. I really don't like the hydrocortisone ointment the doc prescribed for it though because it just seems to (TMI alert!) make it slimier, and then the discharge kind of slips off it it which is uncomfortable and 'drippy' feeling. Ugh. I feel like a cream would be better so I might mention that too when I go back. Really should make an appointment actually to talk about all these little niggles.

Watching One Born Every Minute tonight made me think about labour again and tbh I think the others in the room were bothered/concerned by it more than I was. DD is my first and so I had nothing to compare it to. I had sort of prepared myself for that fact that it was going to hurt it definitely did. I know now that my labour/delivery was less than ideal. From speaking to the midwife afterwards I was very close to being an emergency C-Section and that most people don't have as hard a delivery as I did. But actually, that means nothing to me because my delivery was what it was. Not ideal in any way but I did it and got through it and I have my beautiful DD because of it.

Thank you for all of your suggestions and support. I really appreciate getting advice from someone that will hopefully make a difference. The gp said nothing about softening the poo and it makes sense thinking about it that that will really help.

Haha, and I just spotted a fab typo on your name - Jacksmania as opposed to Jacksmama! Sorry!

Oh no, wait, not a typo... wow my brain is confused and it's late. I'm guessing name change?