Scared of DENTISTS...but HAVE to go!

[MUM23ASD]

please help.

due to back teeth probs- have been eating using my front teeth for years.

front teeth now crumbled on edge.

one front tooth has loads of decay to back (not visable yet in front)

back tooth filling /tooth crack- very jagged- really sore tongue from touching this tooth.

wisdome tooth coming through at bad angle causing me to bit chunks out of cheek.

so fed up of my fear...last major treatment 9 years ago- only 1 visit since which did not go well- 6 years ago- never went back for treatment.

my ideal solution would be to be sedated for however long it took to do any fillings i needed....and remove bad teeth...without them warning me how many would be removed.... to wake up with everything fixed.

I am so scared.

I have OCD/anxiety/depression....in varying degrees.

You can find ones that specialise in nervous patients. They do exist, phone around.

You can do this. Do it for yourself.

I hear ya. I bit mine once.

I then decided to have my teeth straightened [sp] and had to go every month for 2 years and now I'm fine! It can be done.

Hypno? Like with birthing?

Where abouts do you live? Someone may be able to recommend a dentist that they've used which is in your area.

Good luck

can recommend one brilliant one in london if you're near there?

can you post their details, faustina? I have to go pretty soon and I'm not looking forward to the experience at all.

HI, can i just say that I had the most massive fear of dentists and it got to the stage where my two front teeth and four bottom teeth were so badly infected that they looked disgusting. I finally had to find a good dentist. When i did i could not even sit in the chair i was that afraid . Anyway after a couple of visits of standing in the doorway he finally convinced me to let him work on my teeth. I had a small injection was put to sleep and woke up feeling 100% better. Unfortunately i now have two front and four lower false teeth so that is the price i paid for my fears. I can only say that you need to find a dentist you trust, build the trust up and it will be worth it. Good luck and I know what you are going through

take care

xx

I too was seriously scared of the dentist , but after having toothache , i found a brilliant dentist in sevenoaks.

He knew exactly how to deal with my fears , and now 5 years later i had root canal treatment , and it didn't hurt and I didn't feel scared anymore.

My dentist said , dentistry needn't hurt... and he's right.

I was also really afraid of the dentist-this was made much worse just before I got pregnant with ds1 and a visit to a horrible dentist who made me feel like I had the worse teeth in the world. When I found out I was pregnant,all treatment was put on hold and he had to patch up a tooth without anesthetic (sp). I put off going again for 3 and a half years and spent every day worrying about my teeth to the point where it caused me sleepless nights.

I took the big step and found myself a really nice dentist (I looked around for someone who was recommended for nervous patients) - it also made a big difference to me that she is a women.

Anyhow's, I'm in the middle of treatment - she said my teeth aren't that bad - nothing that 3 fillings, a crown, one out and a bloody good clean won't cure I can't explain how much happier I feel - just to be getting it all sorted rather than worrying myself sick....

In short, find yourself a nice dentist who will take time with you......It's not worth worrying about all the time You will feel so much better....

good luck x

Thanks all...

I am now determined to find a dentist tomorrow....

Ilovespinach- you have summed it up so well....
I feel i'd be happy to even pay to just have a proper chat with the new dentist- no treatment or examination on first visit...
I want to write down a list of everything that is wrong- and see how much could be done at once....if possible with me sedated.

i bought some tempory tooth filler and have filled the several teeth that i can manage myself- and it just feels fo fantastic to have no rough jagged bits- so even that has encouraged me.

as like you i lose sleep- and sometimes wish i would just die. exterem i know- but that is how it feels.

I understand completely....

Try tomorrow just to find out some possible dentists in your area and try to call by the end of the week. With me the worst part was making the call for an appointment. Once you do that then at least you will have a date rather then just worrying and worrying you are letting it get worse by not making an apointment.... Any dentist worth their salt with take any treatment at a slow pace...

I have my next appointment next Friday prob for 2 fillings...rather then being worried I am looking forward to just getting things fixed....

Sorry if I come across as preachy....just I was in this position myself not that long ago and want to pass on how much better I feel to all dental phobes in the hope that they can pluck up the courage to get themselves fixed up.....

Am around this board if you need anyone tokick you upthe bum ;)

I am also a dental phobic. I didn't go for 9 yrs at one point.

When I was last looking I found a website that listed dentists that dealt with phobic patients so I just had a look for that again and failed.

However, I did find this I thought I would post it in case it helped although I haven't read it myself yet.

so.

i have registered on a 'waiting list' for a denitist locally that is 'good with nervous patients'

i have phoned the dentist i last saw 6 years ago....and though technically... i shouln't still be registered there...the receptionist has booked me in for tomorrow at 12.20.

She has changed me to a dentist that she thinks will be more sympathetic to my fears...however...as this surgery in general is the reason i feel so scared...i'm not sure it will help.

4 years ago my ds2 had to have 5 injections (me holding him down screaming) as everytime she drilled he was in agony....turned out a week later he had a perforated ear drum- and the pain was not due to drilling
Took me months to forgive myself for putting my child through so much.

I was already phobic before them- but did at least go every 2/3 years...sometimes i even went for the 6month checkup- but that experience with my ds2 absolutely finished me.

ds3 who is 10 in 2 weeks has only gone to a dentist twice. and that is directly related to MY fear...not HIS....

so have also booked him in for a checkup this friday...

THANKYOU to all of you who have been through- survived...and come out smiling...YOUR support has got me this far- I just need to get the filling sorted tomorrow.

mum23, I just wanted to wish you luck tomorrow and congratulate you for facing this head on. I had the same problem and some lovely mumsnetters persuaded and cajoled me into getting it sorted- or at least, taking the first steps. It took me a couple fo visits to get into the chair and get things sorted but i'm nearly there. I have put one treatment on hold as I am pg and need to have a tranquiliser before I go back but I am confident I will sort it once the baby is here.
Please make sure you mention to them about your exact fears - I felt like a total pratt but my dentist didn't bat an eyelid and most importnatnly, didn't patronise.

well done too for sorting your ds after that traumatic experience. my main reason for getting to grips with my fears was my young DD.
Sorry if this sounds patroninsing or anything,dont mean to, just want you to know that it can be done and to offer moral support.Let us know how it goes.

thanks....not at all patronising. EXACTLY what i need to hear!

I have been thinking (as you said) about EXACTLY what i fear.....and it's mainly the having 'something in my mouth' ... feel gagged/need to swallow.
I also hate the vibration of the drill-the sound etc. So injection done- i still cannot relax- as thou the drill won't hurt- i hate the sound/sensation.

and i have realised my 'worst' fear... it's seeing and knowing what they are doing...

this could be the EASIEST to work on.... yes, my WORST fear... in that i will ask the dentist to A) NOT tell me what treatment she will be doing...unless really needs to... so that i can shut my eyes and not expect anything

B)as i said...SHUT MY EYES so i do not SEE what she is doing.

Also, i have just bought myself some alpine plants for a pot i have in my garden. As i was going out to the car, i noticed the time...and noted that in 24hrs from that point I SHOULD be out of the dentist- with hopefully a fixed tooth....
that got me thinking that i would NOT plant these plants TODAY...but wait to TOMMORROW ....AFTER the dentist- to reward me...and also...think about whilst in chair!

mum23, just the way to think about it - I do the same.
FWIW, I told her that I hated things in my mouth and felt out of control - she first just had a look with nothing and then, when I was a bit more confident, she looked with a mirror, but not with the scrapy thing the first time.

oh, and can I suggest taking an ipod or something? She suggested it to me - like you, I didnt want to know what she was doing and an ipod is perfect for letting them get on with it.

Best of luck and look forward to seeing you like this tomorrow!

I wish you loads of luck MUM23ASD

I also don't like the lack of control and as an emetophobe, can't stand the thought of gagging.

The way I would get through tomorrow is to think that they are only looking and won't be doing anything other than having a poke around (and probably give you a great big quote to put it right).

I had to have root canal and a crown and an extraction nearly 3 yrs ago and I think I am partially cured of the phobia. The dentist I went to was a nutter and I would never go back to him again but, after 8 appointments with him, there isn't much that can be as bad again. (I doubt normal dentists are as bad as he was btw - he definitely missed a few classes on patient care).

Take some Bach's Rescue Rememdy - it works although you don't realise until you notice that, despite the fear, you aren't actually panicking and are OK.

I need to find another dentist too - money as well as not knowing who to trust has put me off so far. I must follow your lead and get on with it before I have to spend another small fortune!

Good luck.

well done hope everything goes well for you mums23asd

Bach rescue Remedy in position!
(have used that before- it is great) Thanks for reminding me- i'd forgotten about it.

and the ipod... even hearing them check/list all teeth present/absent like a school register ...with the references to decay and erosion freaks me out- so an ipod could solve that bit.

Plan of action...

having a bath now and then at 11 will take paracetomol/codeine tablets. (partly for expected pain...and partly cos the codeine does make me a bit light headed... bit like a brain numbing!)

Then at 12.10pm i walk for 5 minutes to get to the dentist... ready for my 12.20 appt.

there...all in control ...

go girl !

will be back to check up on you later!

how did it go, mum23?
you ok?

I'm Back!!!! :

Ended up writing a not (which he read fully before i even sat in chair)

more or less covering everything i've posted on here....

He agreed to refer me to have my wisdom tooth out at hospital....before he even looked at it.

The tooth i went about- needs a filling- which i am doing on monday.

he then refered to my note about one of my teeth which is like a dog tooth...long and sharp...at the bottom- making my toungue sore.

he said WITHOUT INJECTION>>>>WITHOUT PAIN he could THERE AND THEN...grind/polish it- to make it feel/look better.

I let him!

It was my 'test' for him...he passed!

I now have a smooth ,rounded tooth!

And he was very gentle- he then said that for all my worries- and avoiding dentist... that on top of the tooth that i went about that has cracked/filling fallen out...that i only need 2 small fillings elsewhere...and if i want that wisdom tooth out he says he can do that for me whilst doing my filling next week....oooooooooh !

I told him all about my 'deep rooted teeth' that take ages to remove- hence me wanting to go to hospital to have it out.... and he says that this being an upper wisdom tooth- that is fully through the gums... that he can do it effortlessly - but he says it is up to me...he will refer me to hospital if i cannot let him do it!!!

so thanks for thinking of me...

i used loads of rescue remedy...and my legs were trembling in the waiting room...however once he had ground down that tooth- my legs stopped trembling!

brilliant - well done. he sounds like nice fellow.
total respect to you for getting that sorted.

it'll be a breeze next time.

fantastic well done sounds like you have found a really nice dentist.

where was the sharp tooth you had ground down?

I have two pointy teeth at the front that I would love to get sorted out if it could be done quickly - think vampire and you get the picture.....