Mum in law has weeks to live, she's desperate to come home, but her husband can't cope

[charleypops]

She's stuck in hospital because she needs round the clock care. Dad in law is overwhelmed and can't cope with. She's so depressed and frightened, she just wants to go back home to where she's lived for 50 years. She has heart disease and her body's packing up - serious fluid retention now which can't be fixed.

They're hundreds of miles away and I feel crap because I can't help as I'm a full time carer for my son who has cerebral palsy and my new baby and there's no where for us to stay anyway.

Is there any kind of suitable care package I should expect and demand for her (from social services etc) that will enable her to live the last few weeks of her life at home? She's 74.

Thank you

Yes - speak to GP about pallative care at home. It can be done.

I'm so sorry for you and totally know how you feel - same happened to us with FIL last October.

Also, Google it so you and your DH understand what's available and can help your FIL to push for it, if he needs back-up and wishes to go ahead.

right. you need full and proper assessment done by palliatve care team at the hospital. they should be able to put care in place for her. she needs to meet criteria for 'continuing health care' which basically means she needs nursing or complex care needs and has a limited time left.
people should be able to choose how to end their days whether at home or in hospital. also contact whichever hospice is local to you. they may have outreach teams or hospice at home provision. Ask hospital if they have done this and if not can the do it now.

Thank you thank you, I'll call them tomorrow now I know what to ask for xx