Dad diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Can anyone give me some hope?

[MistleSQUONKandWine]

They have found secondary cancer in his liver but haven't as yet found the primary one. They think it is probably in his stomach and will do tests in the coming weeks to try and find it.

They said that his liver cancer is inoperable, which he is taking as they mean that there is nothing they can do for him and he's started saying goodbyes.

Have told him it is a bit early for planning his funeral, at least until the docs have given him more information.

Can anyone with any knowledge of this advise me please? I want to know what to expect and I'm a bit frightened to google it.

Thank you.
xx

Squonky - had obviously heard the news but only just seen this thread . So sorry.

I have no experience of this or advice, but please know that I am always here if you want to have a chat / cry / laugh.

Very sorry to hear this squonk.

I said this on LilRed's thread, which is linked below, but here goes again: my mother was diagnosed with a large lung tumour and two brain mets, and privately the oncologists thought she would survive for about six weeks - but in fact she survived for more than five-and-a-half years (and the state of lung cancer treatment in this country is absolutely pitiful - the treatments available to your dad will almost certainly be better and more freely available).

The period between diagnosis being made and treatment starting is absolutely gut-wrenching. I hope you'll all start to feel more positive and strong when treatment starts - I did. Cote is right that there have been many significant advances in cancer treatment in the last few years.

So sorry, squonk.

Thanks everyone for your heartening messages. Thinkone, it is very kind of you to share your story with us. Wishing you all the very best,

Spoke to my stepmother this morning, he has finally seen another doctor! (A full week between them giving him this news and him seeing someone. Twas only his GP though, not an oncologist but at least someone has spoken to my dad about what he can expect over the next few weeks)

He doesn't want to see anyone until he knows more, I suppose he wants to either take support from us all, or say goodbye or whatever. At the moment I am respecting his wishes but I will deffo be going over to see him in the new year (he's in Wales, I'm in Yorkshire so we're not exactly on each other's doorstep)

He still does not have a mac nurse or a date for any kind of further test or treatment

I will keep you all posted as and when we have some news.

Thanks again for all your kind thoughts, and sage advice, I shall certainly be passing it all on.

Dear Squonk,
I am so sorry to hear your news, I lost my Dad to cancer 8 years ago, two weeks after he was diagnosed. We are going thru it again, my husband was diagnosed last March, very hard for us as we have 10 yr old triplets. He had the primary in his bowel and has liver secondaries. The primary was removed in April, then 3 months of terrible chemo, then he had liver surgery in Oct which they told us was 100% successful. Then a few days before Christmas they phoned to say the latest ct scan has shown they did not get all the lesions in the liver, so we are now awaiting an appt for him to go back in to have that removed, then he has another 3 months of chemo, then more surgery for ileostomy reversal! It has and is hell. On the plus side do look at the Cancerbackup site as someone else mentioned. I am on their almost daily, I started my own thread under bowel cancer and have now many friends, either patients or partners. It is so supportive and has helped to take away the fear. It is not all doom and gloom, we have people on their who were told they had months to live and are still here in remission years later. There are several cases of people like your Dad who were told their liver secondaries were not suitable for resection, treated with chemo and the scan shows all clear! He must not give up, there are so many options out there, many new drugs that unless you know about won`t be offered, again Cancerbackup forums are brilliant for this. Also we got Attendance Allowance and the Blue Badge for the car, a huge help financially. Please cat me if I can help you in any way. Lots of love and strength. xxx

My husband has secondary liver cancer,with eight to ten scattered tumours, diagnosed in late November 2009. He is now in the middle of eighteen weeks chemo. The chemo is hard but a recent CT scan shows this is shrinking the tumours and some have disappeared. When the chemo finishes his oncologist is hoping to refer him for a treatment called Radio Frequency Ablation.
I was very cheered to read about someone recovering. Go for the Blue Badge - it makes a lot of difference and Attendance Allowance which I've only just heard about.
Thanks for the help your thread has given me and the best of luck to your dad.

I have a relative who was diagnosed with bowel cancer just over 4 years ago, it had spread to the liver and eventually they found to the spleen too.

To cut a long story short, she is still alive after a couple of operations and masses of treatment. She has currently survived over 18 months longer than the doctors said she would.

Cancer is just so unpredictable, you never know if you are going to have weeks, months or years. I and my family have learnt to just take each day at a time and be thankful for all the time you have.

Er...ummm.....

Anyway, what might help in this awful situation you're in at the moment is Cyberknife radiotherapy. Well worth asking about. It can work on liver mets, as I understand it. Expensive, so some places 'forget' it's there.

Chemotherapy regimes are getting better at targeting stuff and really slowing it down to pretty much a halt, too.

Hmmm...the op was written 3 years ago so current advice may not be relevant.

Yes, an archeologist was fishing old posts to promote some new age rubbish.