Problematic heavy periods, appointment with a male GP - is it unreasonable to tell him I don't want an internal exam?

[policywonk]

My periods have gone a bit nuts (I'm beginning to suspect fibroids) and the only appointment I can get for the forseeable future is with a male GP (the only female GP at my pracice is mysteriously unavailable, seemingly for ever).

I don't want an internal exam - I just want him to refer me to a gynae. I know doctors have seen it all before, blah blah, but having this man give me an internal exam would make me incredibly uncomfortable, and I think I'm right in saying that you'd usually be referred for a case of suspected fibroids anyway? (I know the gynae might well turn out to me male, but at least he'd be an expert.)

Plus, this GP has a reputation among the mothers I know for being a bit creepy (unnecessary breast exams, according to at least two women I know).

So am I being unreasonable to turn up, describe my symptoms but tell him I don't want an internal, just a referral?

Or is this something that could be dealt with at a Well Woman clinic?

Just ask for the referral
If he offers you an internal simply decline

When's the appointment?
I'd pop to Well woman clinic is poss first to see if they can do something.
It's not at all unreasonable to not want to be examined by a male dr, but like you said, he's seen it all before and is a professional or wouldn't still have a job.

Appointment is Thursday morning - but I wouldn't mind cancelling it if a Well Woman Clinic could definitely deal with it instead. Maybe I'll phone them and ask.

I'd give them a call for sure. I'm sure they would, if they can do smears and test for STI's, but I wouldn't know.
Nothing to lose by asking though so might as well

Righto. Thank you and thanks to TheBlonde also!

I asked for a similar referral - no internal required
Not been for appt yet but it's at the hospital and they will do a scan etc not sure they can do that at a well woman clinic

You are likely to get a male gynae of course

but they will always have to have someone in the same room as them to chaperone them - for their safety as well as yours

Thanks Blonde. That's what I'm not sure about - whether WW clinics can refer you. I'll phone tomorrow and ask.

How long will you have to wait for your referral appointment - do you know? I've felt so shite this month, I'd really like something done

MP - I'm pretty much reconciled to the gynae being male, but as I said below at least he'll be an expert and not just say 'hmm, could be a number of things, I'll refer you' as he removes his elbow hand from my nethers.

The appt was via the choose and book NHS system so it was 6 weeks from when I saw my GP but it's been moved back a week now

The hosp here has a menorrhagia clinic

policywonk - I went to male GP with the slight problem of an average of 2 periods a month. Fibroids was only one of the possible causes, and I was referred to hospital where I had internal and external ultrasound (and am fibroid-free). Wasn't a gynae - female ultrasound woman. If your issue is frequency as well, then you may also need a smear - but I just made an appointment with practice nurse for that.
In my case I'm left with possible early menopause - yip .

Thanks Blonde.

Thanks also Hassled. I know it could be a few other things - early menopause is another one I was wondering about. Mine aren't unusually frequent, just stupidly heavy (when they weren't before) and with strange stabby contraction-type pains for the first couple of days. Plus my cervix feels a bit weird.

I'm due a smear anyway so I'll get on to that.

Sorry to hear your inconclusive result - it's crap when there's not much to be done.

I had this two years ago, no exam at all by GP just took history and referred me to gynae. - had exam there then hysteroscopy, all fine.

I've never been asked to consent to an internal for painful heavy periods. A diary was requested, a blood sample etc. But there is nothing to see so not much point in looking up your fanjo (except with a hysteroscope which your GP won't have).

Just go and say you don't want one if he asks.

Tbh I don't think many GPs (male or female) would do an internal exam for heavy periods as a first step.

Where I live you can refuse to have a male health professional examine you unless there is another female present (could be a friend, a nurse, an appointed chaperone)

And of course the only woman GP is unavailable!

Good luck policywonk, I'm sure you will be fine

Any other symptoms btw?

greenlawn - what happened in the end then? Have things changed for the better?

WMMC - thanks.

Mercy - I am really, stupidly, completely exhausted for about five days before the period and about three days at the beginning of it. I've been in bed at 8pm almost every day for the last week. I also seem to have pregnancy brain - I became quite startlingly stupid.

I feel a lot better today, thankfully. But I don't want to feel like that for a week every month.

No cause found for me - quite common I understand. Problem was heaviness and frequency - more bleeding days per month than non-bleeding days! The hysteroscopy ruled out fibroids so was reassuring.

I had a mirena for some time which was wonderful for stopping the periods but awful in terms of mood swings. Just had another baby so I'm waiting to see if I get the same problems back again!

Oh pooh. Sorry to hear that greenlawn. I really want a definitive answer, and then some entirely successful treatment... I guess that's not likely to happen though.

How do you all deal with feeling so bloody exhausted? I really could have cried with tiredness. I can't be like this, I've got a PTA to run

The tiredness is relentless, and I'm glad to hear I'm not alone with the stupidity. I have sorted out mood swings at least (Magnesium supplements - don't understand the science, but it worked).

You would be incredibly young for an early menopause - fingers crossed it's something treatable.

Sorry to hear you are feeling crap policywonk. I'm pretty sure you could ask for referral and decline internal. And I'm positive you can require chaperone.

My GP never examines me without chaperone. I've even become a bit anxious that he thinks I'm some kind of de Clerambault (sp? sp?) stalker type who would insist, in absence of chaperone, we had made passionate love.

My gp is the same as Threadworm's. He never does internals etc. without a chaperone. In fact, he always encourages his female patients to ask to see the female GP for anything like this. It is more time efficient for him and his team.

Thready

Thanks LittleFish and Hassled.

I'm guessing the tiredness is something to do with the blood loss - but not sure what to do about that other than eat raw steak. I'm hoping the GP will test my iron levels.

when I was referred I wasn;t given an internal first, altho I was given an internal at my referral appointment, by the same man who was my consultant for each of my pregnancies.....and he had mahoosive hands

Having said that, it is actually now standard practise that any male doctor giving internals also need to have a female nurse in attendence.

They will probably test iron and thyroid.

The chaperone thing makes me laugh - yes I'm sure its mostly for their protection, ie to protect them from us naughty housewives who just love dropping our knickers for those dashing docs (sorry - mine is 70 if he's a day - very nice man and all that, but really ....).

Ps my ds1 has massive hands - DH thinks he will either be a gynae or a goalkeeper.

My friend was like this- her GP didn't look at anything physically- just referred to gynae.
She had ablation, adn has been brilliant since!
Hope all goes well pw.