Drugs education: what do you think is the right age for this?

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Dp has just come back from a drugs education lecture (he works at a college and this was aimed at adult students) and is worried about drug dealing among children. The lecturer said he had recently given an anti drug talk to 9 year olds locally since he believes there is plenty of drug dealing going on in playgrounds at that age. It was also pointed out at the lecture that some drugs are actively aimed at children - Bart Simpson and telebubby tabs for example and that it is often older children approaching younger ones and offering them drugs for free at first and 25p thereafter.

Anyway, dp wondered what I thought about talking to ds (aged 5!) about drugs and I've said absolutely not! He's too young, I doubt very much there is drug dealing going on at his very small primary school and I don't want to saddle him with an unnecessary burden of worry about the evils of the adult world etc. So when is the right age to have this conversation? Dp wanted me to ask you here, such is his faith in the wisdom of mumsnet. So I am! Interested to hear what you think. When, if ever, do you think you'll have this conversation with your children? And what will you say?

Well WWW, I'm afraid to say that I have already had this conversation with dd2 who is nearly 4. Mainly because about 1 mile from us is an estate that alot of drug dealers live on. I have told her basically than on no account must she take any sweeties without mummy or daddy being there and also both inside our home and where ever else she may be must she put any tablets or anything into her mouth with mummy or daddy saying it is ok. She seems to have accepted this and when she sees people taking them on tele she will always say that lady or mister shouldn't do that without her mummy or daddy. I know people may think nearly 4 is too young, but I would rather have her prepared.

WWW I wouldn't talk to a five year old about drugs either, unless s/he asked a question. In fact I've only a couple of times talked to my ds who has just turned 11. I know they will be 'doing' drugs (iykwim) in their last term at Primary school and that seems like the right sort of age to me. We live in inner london, so I'm sure that there are kids at school who know a hell of a lot, but I wouldnt want to worry my kids about this unless they specifically asked or showed that they wanted to know.
Mind you, this approach of 'waiting to be asked' doesnt neccessarily work: its what I've always planned about sex too, but then ds1 never really asked, so I ended up having to deliberately introduce it into the conversation when he was 9/10. I am trying to be a little bit more proactive about talking about it with dd. She has asked more questions anyway, I guess thats down to personality.
I saw a boy in central London a few weeks ago, about 6 or 7 years old, apparently with grandparents, wearing very trendy clothes including a bandanna with a design of cannabis leaves all over it! Hmm, seemed a little odd.

I'm with you on this one, 5 is a bit early, there's not much point. However, I don't think 9 is. IMO I would say it pays to have an openness about drugs (That includes alcohol) within the family. That way the subject isn't taboo and should ds be approached by anyone, he would be more inclined to mention it. If you were the type to start banging a big drum 'you must, never, ever even think about touching drugs blah, blah' then if and when the thought or issue arises, and it will, your the last person he would come to for advice.
Have you or you dp ever experimented with any illegal substances? Now of course you don't have to answer that but I would be interested to know.
I promise I am not a police woman ha ha!

Chiccadum, hadnt seen yr post when I wrote mine. You are right, very sensible to warn yr child. I suppose I have done that about not eating 'sweets' they find, but without directly relating it to drugs. The other issue is needles in playgrounds and parks, and thinking about it I have spcifically said to my older 2 never to touch them etc, so perhaps I should really have given them a bit more background info about what they are and why. I think I may have skirted over that.

It goes without saying that we should warn them very early on about taking sweeties from strangers etc but I think the question was more about talking directly about drugs.

My mum is a teacher of 5 year olds and has been on drug awareness courses. The aim for 5 year olds is not to teach them about drugs but to enable them to say no to people and not to feel pressurised into anything. I have no idea how she teaches this but I think it is a great idea to increase childrens self-esteem so they don't feel they have to do something just because everyone else is.

I've talked to DD who is now six about drugs just because the opportunity has come up. We talked about it some time ago.

When we lived in Melbourne there were lots of drug messages on TV and there were bright yellow needle disposal things in every loo we went into. I suppose it was then I first mentioned it - perhaps she asked about something.

I realised we were using the word 'drugs' for drugs taken appropriately or inappropriately so I pointed that out to her - that it's okay to take soem medicines or drugs when you are poorly but some people use drugs for the wrong reasons, when they aren't poorly.

We've done a lot of work on saying No. I think it's essential. We often talk about it when she comes home from school saying so-and-so did such-and-such in the playground. I always ask what she said and she used to say 'Nothing' so we worked on saying. 'Don't do that. I don't like it' which tells it as it is, doesn't plead and sets her up well for the future, IMO. If she can get into the habit of this now, it can help with all sorts of future encounters.

We went to a soft play area today which was busy and she came running over a couple of times to tell me she'd stood up for herself against the boys throwing balls up the slide when she wanted to come down and said 'Stop that. How would like it if someone threw a ballat you when you were ocming down the slide?'

Her face lit up when I told her she was doing a great job and before too long she was back saying she'd done something similar.

Thanks for your responses so far, really interesting, keep them coming! Enchanted, I'm sure you're not a policewoman but anyway, the answer to your question is yes, between us we've taken most drugs (socially etc, in the past when younger etc). I reckon even now ds would be bound to ask 'why do people take drugs?' and also 'have you? and what were they like?' and I don't really want to go down that road yet. Yes, we could lie but I'd rather leave it until later. I can barely remember what they were like anyway, it was so long ago

I think it's horses-for-courses, really. When dd1 was 5 I tok a job which involved daily contact with drug users, so drugs were a tea-time topic of conversation. With dd2 we don't have that impetus to talk about the subject, esp as we're living in a country where drug taking is very much a covert activity, due to the existance of the death penalty. (Even alcohol is pretty undercover - I must say, it is very nice not to see drunks on the streets!)

I think that talking to young children about refusing 'sweets' and being wary of syringes, needles etc is a necessity these days, sadly, if there is a chance they will be in such a situation. It isn't unknown for needles to turn up in school playgrounds, for instance.

I don't think it's ever too early to talk to your child about drugs, sex etc. Just make sure you8 couch it in terms they can understand. E.g. don't talk about drugs and getting high to a five year old, but talk about some things are not nice to swallow adn that's why you don't swallow things unless Mummy or Daddy or the Doctor says it's OK. Schools regulalry teach Reception adn Yr 1 children about the dangers of the medicine cabinet and the under the sink cupboard - this IS drugs education, but couched in terms of what they understand and the likely dangers facing a child of that age. Once they've grasped this then move onto prescription drugs and when you can / can't take them etc.

I agree with you titchy, it's never too early. We teach the children in our school about drugs in terms of who and what keeps me healthy; what do I put onto and into my body to keep me healthy? Let's face it, drugs covers such a huge range of things, it has to be in the broadest terms for young children. I had a child in my class who came to school last year ( he walked everyday on his own) who had picked up an opened bottle of WKD with ironbru on the way to school and drank the lot!!! It could have had anything in it, never mind the alcohol content!!!!!

WWW, thank you for your honest response and just for the record, so have we. The difference is we both got into serious trouble with both drugs and alcohol and ONLY JUST lived to tell the tale. Niether of us drinks or uses drugs now, in fact we have never had so much as a shandy together. The point I was going to make was that in a home where there is an openess about these issues, there seems to be less trouble. My Mum and Dad used to say 'do not smoke' yet they were both on 40 a day. They also said 'do not drink' my father was an alcohol abuser. It was do as I say, not as I do and there was no room for disscusion.
DH and I often sigh when people like Leah Betts father do anti drugs talks. Dont get me wrong he is a very passionate and well meaning chap and this is how he has chossen to deal with his grief but I'm doubtful about how much good it is doing. He has probably never taken a drug in his life. He is absolutley right that Extasy can kill however, these kids are thinking 'no it doesn't I know loads of people who have taken it'. Now if you had someone that they could relate to, perhaps someone just a little older than them who could tell them they have tried it and although it wasn't fatal they are suffering long term depression, I feel that would have more impact. More facts!
I heard a comedian on R4 talking about the things parents say to their children and it really rang true for me. 'Don't touch that grid' say's Mum 'Why?' 'Because a child died once touching a grid' says Mum. ' Dont sit too close to the TV'...'Why?'... 'Becuase a child died once sitting too close to the TV'. Ring any bells!
DH and I intend to be honest with DS about our experiences when the time is appropriate. I think if we don't have any personal experience then we can educate ourselves so as to give accurate information and back it up with good example. Most of all, a childs self esteem is directly proportioate to them being able to say 'NO' and thats goes for everything, drugs, alcohol and anything else that someone may try to get them to do against their better judgement.
DS is only 2.5, so in the mean time we work on his esteem, he knows how special he is because he is shown and told often. He knows that what he has to say is important because we make an effort to listen to him. (not all the time of course)
I am with Sue W one this one teach them how to say NO. At the end of the day it'll be the child who is confident that will tell the drug dealers or letchy boss to bugger off, then call Mum and tell her all about it.

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