managing a hernia - any knowledge?

[ThingOne]

I had major surgery in December part of which was to make a permanent colostomy via keyhole surgery.

Before I had recovered fully I noticed a bulge just above my stoma which has stayed much the same. Sadly the registrar I saw at my post op check up was a bit crap and dismissed it and another complication which has since given me a lot of grief. Since major op, lots of other treatment, complications, unpleasantness and more surgery.

I have finally been allowed to get some proper physio and he asked me to get the bulge checked. The surgeon confirmed that it was a weakness, not yet a hernia. But the evil bastard said I wasn't to do stomach exercises or lift heavy things including my children (2 and 4). He said that stomach exercises would put more stress on the bulge and make it herniate sooner. Is this right? I thought I would be better with stronger tummy muscles to hold me all together.

I was a bit gobsmacked and upset as was looking forward to getting fit again so didn't ask enough questions .

Does anybody know anything about how best to manage this kind of thing, or any decent references I can find?

I do need to protect it but also want and need more muscles!

Bump! I can only find out about how to deal with existing hernias, despite reading stacks. Anybody know anything?

My 8 year old daughter had a hernia last year. The doctor said that these things don't go away or get better on their own, so she had surgery. It was a simple procedure and she recovered after a few days. I realise that after all you have been through you are reluctant to go under the surgeon's knife again. What does your GP say?

I only saw the surgeon on Friday. Going away tomorrow until Tuesday, so can't see GP until then.

Surgeon said it wasn't yet a hernia and they would wait until it was and then they would mend it.

I'd just like some practical quality of life in the meantime!