alcohol tolerance - is my DP a freak of nature?

[sandy4]

No matter how much my DP drinks, it doesn't seem to have any effect. He drinks at least a bottle of red wine & a couple of glasses of spirits daily (I think that works out on average 80 units a week).

I have a very low tolerance to alcohol, so don't often drink. (so maybe being a bit anal).

He had a health check last year & his liver is OK. he doesn't see the point in having alcohol free days as its something he enjoys. But he is very irritable until he has a drink and because he handles drink so well he thinks it's OK to drive after 3 large glasses of wine.

Do you think he has a problem or is it me?

I think it depends on whether the irritation is directly after work, whether he has a stressful job etc and whether he is irritable until he has a drink at all times - for instance, on holiday, weekends etc.

None of you know him or his lifestyle so are not exactly in a brilliant position to diagnose alcoholism!

Alcohol doesn't necessarily make you put on weight, either.

Alcholics don't eat much, for one thing.

The driving after three large glasses of wine would concern me greatly.

He may not feel drunk, but his reactions will be altered by the fact that he has alcohol in his blood stream.

I would find it extremely difficult to have a relationship with someone who drank that amount of alcohol and thought it safe to drive

I would have to offer an ultimatum - stop drinking and driving, or I'll contact the police.

He may think he feels OK to drive. I guarantee he won't feel so great when he stupidity has cost some innocent person or people their lives or health.

Idiot.

ggirl - no, he's only 5' 6'' & average build
IAmNotHere - saw the results, it was all OK
Desiderata - I also had alcoholic mum, but couldn't help her.

Agree with Bettenoire - also, what if he gets hit by someone (not his fault) but gets breathalysed and IS over the limit..........

Ah, my sympathies, sandy. It got to the point with me where I didn't want to help her, unfortunately.

Wisteria - his family are like yours - they can all handle large amounts of alcohol

It doesn't mean that they should though, does it....... well not and drive afterwards anyway - twattishness of the highest order IMO.

My Dad drinks too much on a regular basis but doesn't start until gone 10pm whereas I will have the odd glass or two of wine but not every night, it's rare that I finish a bottle these days but I know I can IYSWIM. Both my brothers don't drink in the week but do at weekends and sometimes to excess, given that they are only in their late 20's early 30's I think that's quite normal (not married, no kids).

Sometimes I do feel that I need a drink, after a particularly bad day at work to unwind and I suppose I could be irritable beforehand too - that does not = alcoholism!

No, I agree, I don't think that does = alcoholism.

We don't live together when he's working, but I know on work free days DP starts drinking mid day & work days he starts when he gets home. He doesn't have an especially stressful job.

It's the drink driving that is making me so angry.

I really appreciate all the comments. I'm off out to buy a breathalyser.

Feel like a complete militant. Keys will be hidden & balls will be kicked.

He has a huge problem, he is an alcoholic - he is irritable until he has a drink? His liver was ok??? Well maybe it was maybe it wasn't - there has to be quite a significant amount of chirrosis before symptoms and even raised liver enzymes in the blood occur.

I get annoyed with DP who will drive after one pint, but he will only do this if the pint accompanies food.

As someone else has said, i hope you don't live me, i don't fancy any one of my family becoming a statistic because your husband, in his arrogance, deems himself ok after being probably twice over the legal limit. His reactions will be slowed, even if he feels OK - sorry, he has a problem and he needs to get over himself im afraid.

Have had serious talk & DP has now promised to use a breathalyser before he drives & will NOT drive if over the limit.

As for feeling irritable until he drinks, his defence is that I'm irritable if I don't eat. I think there is a bit of denial going on there.

Sandy4 - ask him to have a look at this.

whomoved - thankyou, have added to favorites, will show him tomorrow.

"Have had serious talk & DP has now promised to use a breathalyser before he drives & will NOT drive if over the limit".

Well, that's a small concession, I suppose.
But still massively avoiding the issue.

It sounds like he may need other influences to highlight that his drinking is such a big issue.

Does he have any friends or relatives that are concerned about his drinking?

If others were to raise their concerns too, he couldn't put it down to you nagging him.

BetteNoire - I agree, ultimately, it is avoiding the issue.

No one else has voiced concerns over his drinking. They are a drinking family. Did try to raise it with dp's SIL but her opinion was - they are all like that, they have mediterranean blood