Whats the difference between Councilling (sp??) and talking at length with friends??

[Ladytophamhatt]

I think I prob do need to talk to someone about stuff but thinking about it today, theres nothing I wouldn't say to a councillor that I woudln't say to my best friend, close friends...any firends really.

I'm not embarrassed about all teh shite inside my head, I can talk about easily. The only thing I can't do is talk about with DH because its pretty much all about his mother.

What or How will acouncillor make it better?

Apologies if I'm being stupidly naive...

If all you want to do is talk to someone who will listen, and you have friends who will listen without judging, then I guess you probably don't need a counsellor.

Adavantages of a counsellor are - the counsellor is there for you and you only, and won't discuss your stuff with anyone else, plus you can go over the same ground as many times as you need without worrying about boring anyone.

also a counsellor can suggest and help you work out some strategies for coping with whatever it is you're dealing with.

About £75 an hour!!

Seriously, a counsellor is someone you can put in a box, so to speak, and only get them out during sessions. They are not part of your life. They won't mention to other counsellors what you tell them and they won't throw it in your face if you have a row! You also won't be trying to talk about your problems while the counsellor is trying to change the subject to their problems. It is your time.

non judgemental, safe environment for you to offload

it is amazing to get someone's undivided attention for an hour and for someone to really LISTEN to you

If you go to couselling, a million strangers on the internet don't get to read about your problems.

I do have one friend in particular who i know will listen and be completely ok with everything I say.
My best friend already knows all of what I think and how it affects me and it was talking to one of my RL post natal group mums that made me realise one huge factor in how MIL makes me think/feel.

So I really am able to talk about it.....but I suppose its the being unbaised and non judgemental thing thats missing with talking to friends.
(Not that anyone could possible side with MIL after teh way she treated me.)

A councillor will not just agree with you and sympathise as your friends will. She/he will listen but also come out with the odd thing which will make you see things from a new perspective or help change the way you feel or respond. Like little moments of inspiration or insight.

agree with shitemum ruby slippers
insight coping strategies recognising patterns if good counsellor it would be worth it

its great you've got good friends like this though

A counsillor is trained to help you think about and process the steps you need to take in order to move on imo she won't tell you what to do or suggest but will ask questions to help you find the answers you need.