Need to talk, just called in sick, think I am losing the plot

[chocolatemummy]

anyone feel able to prop me up before I fall?
sitting here in tear after what I'think' was a massive panic attack?

Hello, just read OP and had a quick scan but wanted to give you some {{hugs}} before I read anymore. Firstly, when I am on verge of exploding/imploding I find a few things can help - firstly, it's pants to try and relax first if that makes sense, have a good cry and get it out of your system. I find if I try and relax when I am really anxious/panicy it just exaggerates it almost. THen have a bath or something, don't really try to relax because then you won't (I find anyway) , just concentrate on that. Then write down everything seperatly that is on your mind/worrying you and hit each one one by one. tHAT'S WHAT HELPS ME ANYWAY i FIND, IF THAT IS AT ALL RELEVANT TO YOUR SITUATION {{HUGS}} X

Pants, sorry, DS hit keyboard

You could look into paid post grad training maybe? There will be a society/association for whatever career which may list paid training opportunites?

But - what do you feel like doing now?

You could take the afternoon to look into paid training/finance for courses etc. You may feel better if you start getting a real idea of opportunites, pathways to follow etc..

OR

you take the rest of the afternoon to have a bloody good rest/chill/tidy/watch a film/read a book/play some isketch. Get yourself in a better mood for when dd is home and make a note to look into all the other stuff later.

Sorry you're having a crappy time

Bach's Rescue Remedy might be worth a go for panic attacks.

agree with lady of waffle, write things down! what are you struggling with? write down a plan to deal with it.

i.e. set routine for dd (as much as possible with your work)
reward chart to encourage good behavior
would any one be willing to commit to taking her for an afternoon after nursery/school?

as far as a career change goes open uni does courses that are subsidised if you are on a lower income (dont know how much you earn) i think as a family you need to have £30 000 before you dont qualify for any help, but that varies depending on the amount of dependants.

panick attacks i had these once, there is a mild sedative that you can get from your docs but it would go on your medical record. another way is next time you feel one coming on, sit down and breathe deeply and calmly, do your best not to let it scare you (i know thats hard) and focus on breathing slowly.

I am trying to look at places/subjects to study now because when i get my daughter back i dont want to be on the computer and I never have time off work without my daughter to do this stuff.........part of the problem.
Nearest place for osteopathy is oxford or London, London school of osteopathy do a 5 year weekend only course which is great

but it costs £25,000 !!!!! bloody hell
bachs rescue remedy?....where would I get that from?

any chemist/boots etc.. Usually round by where the vitamins are. Its just a herbal remedy but it works wonders for me

Chocolate

firstly {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

Please don't put off getting help for yourself because you are worried about it impacting on your future job prospects. I work in health care and nearly everyone I know (including me) has (at some time or another) suffered stress or depression. It has not impacted a jot on their career paths. What will impact is allowing yourself to become so unwell that you are literally incapacitated, which is a long way from whwre you are at currently by the sounds of it.Unfortunately working in social or health care is incredibly stressful and if you dont get the support you need to do your job from somewhere it is sooooo hard not to burn out. Things can kind of build up and build up quietly then ne day you tip over the edge When I was ill I did seek help from my GP who was really supportive, I had a course of medication (anti anxiety) and had 5 weeks off work. I have since gone on to progress into better jobs so it can be done. The fact that you left one job to go to a better job shows you must be good at what you do The gp may also be able to refer you to some counselling, honestly it can be so so helpful just to get everything off your chest!

Sorry am probably rambling but am trying to point out that you are ding a really difficlult job, in the background are facing job uncertainty (any chance they will extend/ renew your contract btw?) and do no wnder you are feeling crappy.You are the main breadwinner and have a little one too,who is obviously going through a difficult patch.

If you want t change career direction there really is always a way but it ususally does take lots of investment of time, energy, and money, all of which will come easier if you can get yoursdelf feeling stronger NOW!!

let us know how yuo get on

choc - i know how you feel. I am crently off with work relted stress, work in child protection, anf felt that all my time was spent sorting other peoples fmailes whilst mine was falling apart.
Had recently increased hrs and had awful guilt about not being there for DS's.
Can you reduce or compress your hours at all? ARe you able to take time off sick?
I am so glad i did as i was on verge of nervous breakdown.
Might be worth visiting your GP?
CAn you get a grant to retrain?
I would love to do a less stressful job but can't afford to take a paycut, I am reducing my hrs slightly though ehn i go back.

look on internet bach flower remedys.They deliver .I have had rescue remedy from them.It does help.If you are feeling nervous etc.You need to have a positive out look as well.Easier said than done.Good luck.things do sort them selves out.Just have to get through difficult times.It does make you stronger.

will def try these Bach remedies, my go off and buy myself some in a bit.

Anyone got any good websites for reward charts etc? I really need to sort my daughter out, she was just terrible this morning and has gone through a wrecking spree last couple of weeks costing us £200.

here or here supernanny officail website mioght have some good tips for you

How are you today chocolatemummy? I hope you had a better evening.

Hi Chocolate sorry to hear you're having such a rough time, I can empathise I work in CAMHS and am seriously considering leaving, the amount of stress and pressure is really affecting my relationship with my dd and my dh, I have "mad sundays" because I'm so wound up and anxious about going to work on Monday I get really irritable and agitated.

With regards to practical help for panic, I'm part trained in CBT so here goes, ladyofwaffle was exactly right, trying to relax/deep breathe will actually prolong and intensify the attacj, any concsious focus on physical symptoms such as deep breathing will heighten the sensation and therefore the catasprophiv thoughts and therefore the appraisal and then the anxious arousal. That's a v potted version of about 3 sessions.

When in an attack the best thing you can do is just go with it and try to distract yourself with normalising activities. Also remember that although it's a horrible physical sensation it's actually a psychologocal symptom and it can't harm you.

When you're nit having an acute attack then take some time out to explore what the main issues that are affecting you are and practical "SMART" ways of addressing them.

I don't think there would be any adverse effect on your cv if you asked for an NHS CBY referral. But if you'd rather not you can try the www.babcp.com where you'll find a lsi of accredited local therapists. If that's what you'd like to pursue.

Thinking of you xxx

Hello Fanella etc, I feel a bit better today, had a much better morning with my dd but its getting closer and closer to work time (2) an I can feel myself getting anxious. I seriously thought about just not going back this morning when I got up, I am only there til the end of Sep anyway.
I got some Bachs remedies which I took one lot last night and one lot this morning nad will do another before I go to work.
My chest still feels a bit uncomfortable like it has pressure on it. I never realised how scary panic attacks were.

Hi Chocolate, sorry I've not checked back in a couple of days - don't want you to think I've forgotten about you.

How are you feeling now? I hope work wasn't too stressful for you on Tuesday. How are things with dd?