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Original poster

really embarassing foreskin problem!

16 replies

embarrassingsituation · 23/06/2008 07:46

i feel so embarassed asking for help on here but im not sure what else to do and need some advice from others who may have experienced this.
my dp has a very tight foreskin (and says he always has) he can't pull it back at all flacid or erect. sex can be very uncomfortable and get sore for him, as well as the fact he finds it hard to ejaculate. we find ourselves both getting frustrated, sore and cross with each other when attempting sex!
we were talking last night and i said he really needs to go the the gp but he says he's really embarraseed plus he's read stuff on the internet that says men really regret having it done.
are there any other options apart from circumcision and if that is the only route does anyoneknow how long the wait is on the nhs? does anyone have any positive experiences of this? its starting to make a problem in our otherwise brilliant relationship.

OP posts:

Hecate · 23/06/2008 07:52

Has he tried stretching it?

here's some advice

My dh is circumsised. It was done 'ritually' at the age of 14 (no anesthetic!!!!! ). He got over it! so done in the UK in a hospital with pain relief should be quite easy to recover from

Original poster

embarrassingsituation · 23/06/2008 08:21

thank you! no anaesthetic ouch! it seems like there is a year long wait on the nhs so thanj you for the stretching advice, as a year seems very long to wait!

OP posts:

umberella · 23/06/2008 08:24

i saw something like this on the 'embarrassing illnesses' programme - maybe you should look up the website?

Original poster

embarrassingsituation · 23/06/2008 08:41

thanks umbrella just looked but there's nothing on there about it

OP posts:

TheApprentice · 23/06/2008 08:54

My Dad and brothers have all had the op due to medical reasons (I have never enquired as to the details!), but its not been a problem, although obviously its not a pleasant procedure , but they soon recover!

Your dh must go to GP, you cant carry on like this, it sounds awful!

Furball · 23/06/2008 09:21

good info here

Twinkie1 · 23/06/2008 09:26

You need to get it sorted - DHs split the first time he had sex and by all accounts - because it wasn't me he was having sex with - it was extremely painful - cue years of associating sex with blood and gore and pain and lots of counselling - he is fine now but you need to get him to address this.

DHs family are quite a bit older than most so they didn;t talk about sex and things of that nature but DH says if only he had had it done routinely rather than as an emergency he would have found it a lot easier to handle.

My friends husband was done a couple of years ago though as his was very tight and he was fine in about a week - he had a local anesthetic and said it wasn;t that bad!

Good luck.

Wilkiepedia · 23/06/2008 10:34

I believe - rightly or wrongly - that they don't need a full cicumcision but can be 'snipped' at the base where the foreskin meets the penis. This wouldn't have a year long wait I am sure.

However, he needs to go to the GP or GUM to have it checked - not only for sex reasons but for health reasons too as if he cannot pull it back far enough then he won't be able to clean properly and there may be a risk of infection.

Drs have seen far worse than a tight foreskin!

HTH

Tinkerisdead · 23/06/2008 10:38

This happened to my DH, two years ago at 27 he finally had to be circumised. i can totally understand why your husband is embarrassed. My DH was trying to clean his and foreskin became stuck behind the glans. that then swelled obviously and he was in agony! he had to get his mum to come round to take him to GP who referred straight to hospital. He found that far more embarrassing.

having a circumscion in adulthood is indeed very painful, he had to sit for two weeks watching films as he couldnt walk etc. But he never shuts up about how it was the best thing to have done and he shouldnt have been embarrassed before as the consequences were far worse in waiting.

DaDaDa · 23/06/2008 10:50

He could have a frenuloplasty if appropriate and remain a 'convertible' Paper pants for a few days but otherwise not a big deal.

DaDaDa · 23/06/2008 10:50

He could have a frenuloplasty if appropriate and remain a 'convertible' Paper pants for a few days but otherwise not a big deal.

DaDaDa · 23/06/2008 10:51

Probably best to only do it once though....

DaDaDa · 23/06/2008 10:51

Probably best to only do it once though....

Original poster

embarrassingsituation · 23/06/2008 16:58

thank you all so much for your advice. im going to book him a dr appt and go with him as i think he'll clam up when he gets in there!

OP posts:

MaeBee · 23/06/2008 20:15

my partner got a partial circumcision cos of a similar problem that op described. sex is loads better for him now, cos he doesn't get sore. basically his foreskin was just a little too tight. it wasn't a long waiting list, he just went to the doctor and was operated on within a few months.

alittleteapot · 23/06/2008 20:30

my partner had a frenuplasty a few months ago because his foreskin felt uncomfortably tight during sex. so far i'm afraid to say it hasn't made him alot more comfortable, but hopefully as the scar matures it will. good luck to your dp

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