Constant ill and weight won’t budge, what am I missing?

[Limon22]

Looking for some collective wisdom please.

I’m 39 and a mum of one 3-year-old, and for the past year or so I feel like I’m constantly catching colds / flu-type bugs. As soon as one goes, another starts — and when I do get ill it completely wipes me out for a good three weeks at a time.

I’m also absolutely knackered despite getting plenty of sleep, and my weight has completely plateaued no matter what I do.

I’ve had bloods done and the GP says they’re normal. Thyroid is fine. I had a colonoscopy before Christmas which was all clear, and I’ve been tested for coeliac — not coeliac.

Lifestyle-wise, things are actually pretty good. My child is honestly a dream — sleeps brilliantly, happy, and I absolutely love being his mum, so it doesn’t feel like parenting stress. I’m not depressed. My work is balanced and flexible, I work from home a lot and set my own hours, so stress levels are low.

I eat fairly well, try to stay active, and don’t drink much — partly because alcohol really doesn’t agree with me anymore. Even one glass (or four!) causes horrible flare-ups afterwards, so I mostly avoid it.

I’ve also always felt very sensitive to lifestyle even from when I was younger. I’ve never been able to drink much without a huge physical impact, if I have a few bad days eating I get awful bloating, and I’m very sensitive to poor sleep — I have to work hard at getting enough sleep or I feel dreadful.

I constantly crave sugar, which doesn’t help, and I have mild PCOS — but my cycles are regular and I’ve been told my hormonal health looks “good”.

I just feel run down all the time and a bit fed up if I’m honest.

Has anyone been through similar and found a cause? Immune issues? Post-viral stuff? Allergies? Gut issues? Something obvious I should be pushing the GP to look into?

I had extensive fertility and immune testing in November so I’m pretty confident it’s not an auto immune or menopause. I do have a higher number of NK killer cells but believe that’s only an issue having a baby,

Any advice, things to ask for, or “this was me and it turned out to be X” stories very welcome. I’m just tired of feeling rubbish and not knowing why.

Thanks in advance ❤️

ME? (Chronic fatigue?) sounds v similar to- bloods all normal but still exhausted. Did you get Covid a few times?

When you say you eat “fairly well” what does that mean in reality?

I did think ME only I have the energy to run/do lots with my little boy etc. I’m not bed bound. I go into London twice a week with no major issues, I just feel wiped. I have had Covid definitely once but suspect more. However these issues are long existing since before COVID. I had glandular fever when I was 19 and SWINE flu age 21. I just find anything my son brings home floors me but my husband gets nothing.

I would eat really balanced, my only gripe would be I love a bit of chocolate daily and enjoy the odd coffee. But we cook all our dinners from scratch, I eat a high protein smoothie or porridge for breakfast, lunch is soup/salad/sandwich. Eat out little and not much fast food if at all really. I do find I’m constantly hungry which doesn’t help but I watch my calories.i try to eat 30 plants a week too which I’m good at

Is your bmi in healthy range?
Do you get enough sleep? (I noticed you have young children)
Have you looked at your bloods, especially iron, b12 and vitamin d. Fine and in range for the NHS doesn’t mean optimal.

If all that is OK, it maybe time to consider HRT.

How overweight are you?

No BMI is high but that’s my issue I am struggling to lose. I’m 14.5 stone and 5ft 7. Now I’m strong and I run so by no means unfit. But defo need to get weight down but finding it hard to shift.

I sleep 7-9 hours a night. Little boy is a great sleeper and wakes after 7am so no issues there. I just find it so hard to wake up.

Iron is low - I had a traumatic miscarriage last year where I haemorrhaged in the surgery and iron levels remain a challenge. Getting a full check of bloods again this week but last lot before Xmas were good. I am on Effexor for anxiety following a tough fertility journey which has been a bloody godsend so mood wise really good. Just my energy. I am desperate to lose three stone this year and just find my spark back. Really love my life and just want to energy to enjoy it.

You eat

a smoothie for breakfast
soup or salad for lunch
and home cooked dinner

and that’s all? And you’re 14.5 stone?

Step 1 is always going to be being honest with yourself

Yes that is all. I am really honest with myself thank you. I track everything. I have had a long standing issue with my weight due to pcos. I don’t gain any weight at all which I think is a clear indicator that I’m not overeating. And I burn about 2500 to 3000 calories a day so 90% time in a calorie deficit: Some people struggle to lose weight believe it or not, we’re not all huge fatties eating dominos on the hour. I’m not being defensive I’m just looking for tangible advice, not judgement or suggestions that I’m not being honest with myself.

You could buy some iron tablets, or ask GP to prescribe something - that might help with the feeling of being warn out.

Get some exercise most days, if only a bit if toning at home and a good walk.

I'd be starving on that, I have to admit. Having said that, I don't like creamy full or semi skimmed milk as it's too creamy, not I to spread so get extra calories elsewhere.
When you say a nit of chocolate coffee, are you talking a whole bar or 2/3 pieces, same with coffee it could be a black coffee or something containing higher fat milk. Again, evening meals can vary in calories depending on size and content.

Either way, hope you feel better soon

It might be a two finger kitkat or a twirl?. I actually am doing couch to 5k and I pretty much hit 10k steps on top of that 6/7 days a week (we walk to preschool, have a dog and the days im in the city to lots too). It’s all very disheartening as the scales just don’t budge in either direction. I’ve dropped a size from change in composition but am still overweight. That’s a recent picture of me from three weeks ago. Size 14 to 16.

And you’re eating about 1500 calories a day? If that??

No about 1500 - 1900.

im sorry im really not clear on why you are so focused on my calories? Like I am asking about wider health/how I can feel better and you just seem to have honed in on being overweight and assuming that I am lying. It’s extremely odd. I am working with a PT and my GP. If I was lying to myself I wouldn’t be doing any of that so kindly unless your next post is helpful, please don’t reply.

I’ll preface this by saying I am on WLI but that was after I lost 3stone going slimming world. Work out your TDEE, to loose 1lb per week, you need to reduce your calories by 500 per day (1lb =3500cal). There are a lot of calories in food, and it all adds up very quickly. That dash of oil, the squirt of sugary vinegar sauce or spread of butter, glass of wine all adds up. Make an accurate food diary and calculate the calories you are consuming, drink plenty of fluids (most say water but honestly any water based liquid helps metabolise the fat away!) I know it’s difficult when you are ill and tired all the time. If you are persisting in your exercise when you are ill perhaps take a break from it to give your body time to get over the illness. My doctor suggested magnesium supplements and I’m also B12 deficient which adds to tiredness.

Just seen you photo, you have a lovely figure, I am dreaming of getting up that!

Physiologically if you burn more calories than you eat then you will lose weight. Isn’t that what these fatty jabs are all about…they stop you eating therefore you lose weight. No rocket science involved.

Would it be worth considering focussing on the tiredness and feeling well first, and leave the weight loss until you are feeling better overall? You are working with a PT, presumably they are setting your target calories in a deficit in order to lose weight, but maybe a period of eating at a maintenance level might help with your overall wellbeing.

Something is not right - are you sure you’re describing your diet accurately? Maybe start weighing and using my fitness pal. You might be surprised at home many excess cals you’re consuming. You shouldn’t have a high BMI if you are truly eating the diet you describe

Yeah, I lost two and half stone myself and track everything. I am in a calorie deficit but. I’ve hit a plateau. I track and weigh my food, aware of the calories in oil etc. And I am very active. Contemplating WLI but would really love to not have them.

Yes I am sure I am describing my food accurately. I use my fitness pal and have an Apple Watch.

have to admit finding the obsession with my weight on this thread fascinating and odd. It’s like it’s the only piece people have focused on. Very strange.

For what my opinion is worth, op, I think you look great at your weight. But I get wanting to lose some weight to feel right for your frame.

Have you considered upping your protein and aiming to get more at every meal? And add weight training to your cardio routine? Even body weight- push ups, plank variations,squats - and then progress to weights for extra resistance. More muscle helps with hormonal regulation, insulin sensitivity and regulating appetite. And as you are running a calorie deficit regularly then you will lose fat and gain definition.

Wow a reply that hasn’t just accused me of lying about my food and actually addressed the concerns in my post about my energy and wellbeing - thank you 🙏 This isn’t a bad idea. I just wish I could feel a bit more energised. I do my activity and gym etc but I can be so floored after it all. It’s just all very hard at the moment. Feels harder than it should do.

Will try magnesium and b12, haven’t looked into that I have asked for my b12 to be reviewed this week so that might help!

Awh thank you so much that is so very kind of you. I work very hard at it just so disheartened with the plateau and feeling rubbish. Just wanted to show some of the posters on here that I clearly am not a lazy person who’s secretly eating crap all day. Weight loss sadly isn’t black or white is it. I hope your journey is going ok x