bloody childhood obesity again (sorry)

[misdee]

dh wont discuss it with me.

am getting extrmely worried about dd1 again.

she wants to eat all the time.

even when i direct her to the fruit bowl she wants more and more.

she has outgrown her brownies skort. just measured her and her tum is measuring 30". according to the charts on the guiding online shop that is for children 164cm tall. dd1 is just 125cm tall.

what do i do?

it is time to see the GP isnt it?

feeling like i have failed.

i now soupdragon. he was put on an 'eat whatever the hell you want diet as long as it high in calories' diet for years to counter the extra calories he needed to maintain his weigth wheilst in heart failure (heart failure causes the body to work harder, hence he losing 1/3rd of his body weight when first ill). now he needs to eat healthily, but i can tell you he wont. i just feel like i'm hitting my head against a brick wall. i know i have a weight problem and was combatting that before falling pregnant (am now almost opver morning sickness so might go back to slimming world next week as they do a programme for pregnant women).

i try and set a good example. but feel like i'm losing.

dd3 used to shout for fruit, now she shouts for crisps.

Have you heard of this? It's aimed at families and is supposed to be fun! No idea whether you have any groups near you - you could register and see?

www.mendprogramme.org/

looks good. wil ldelve deeper into that site.

I meant mostly that he needed a stern talking to about how it's affecting the girls. Might he change (or at least hide!) his eating habits for their sake?

Maybe if he missed out on time with her because he was ill, this is his way of sort of reclaiming her and showing his love, and there might even be some guilt in there. Does that make any sort of sense?
Since he has been so ill, do you think appealing to his desire to see his daughter grow up healthy would be more effective than any focus on her weight (though clearly the two are interlinked).
Also, though I think you are totally right to be aware of her weight, my oldest went through a very podgy stage at about this age, and has grown and lengthened out and is a very slender teenager. And now she monitors her own diet to ensure it is healthy, her portions are quite small and she eats healthily without starving herself at all.

Exercise is important but the healthy eating is paramount. She needs a healthy diet much lower in fat that she is currently on. I would recommend a trip to a GP and a referral to a dietitian.

Set a good example for eating and exercise and trust that she will learn from you.However don't stress to much, my son was chubby to say the least when younger and had to have teen clothes that I shortened to fit ,now he's so thin that jeans for his age(13) need belts and we even had one neighbour who thought he was ill or something.
If you make your child too aware then she may become paranoid about her weight when older, better just to explain that sweets and crisps etc. are ok in small amounts but can make you unwell if eaten to often.
Also if worried about how much fruit etc. she eats or water she drinks try doing charts that she fills in and gets stars/rewards(obv not sweets etc) for at end if she say has her 5 a day or drinks lots of water.This works well even with older children

The other problem with crisps of course is that they are very high in salt and that itself can become almost addictive. Bad for kidneys and likely to lead to high blood pressure later in life.

You need to sit down with her and in a manner she will understand all the problems she will face if obese - not the fact that other kids will rib her but the health issues!

Did you see the programme about the obese children that was on TV a while ago - the main problem is portion size - is your daughter eating the same as you or what a child of their age should be eating - I think they should only have a handful - thier size hand - of each food group in each meal.

Agree with singing mum about emphasising they are ok in small amounts. Multipack portions are smaller, and you can choose the lowest fat/salt options. Then say that multipack has to last the week?
I would go to the docs if only to have your mind put at rest if nothing else. My husband was morbidly obese until very recently and am very conscious about not making food a big issue with DS.
I love the idea about making your own snacks from scratch too.

that mend programme is ace, my friend is doing it and I can't believe the difference in her and her kids. also, she says her kids now nag her if she buys unhealthy food!
how about an exercise programme as well to get the flab burned off? sign her up for a few classes if you've got the cash, if not,how about a family walk every night or something like that, as a family?

you need to be really strong about this if you want to turn your family's eating around.

The first is don't buy any junk food - one of the things that happens to people that eat rubbish is that lose all tastes for natural food, so trying to offer wholesome food whilst junk is around or in a 'treat' box, is never going to happen.

Get the family together & explain that you're all going to be healthy & fit & it's going to be great because you'll have lots of energy & look fantastic. Don't make it more complicated, just be matter of fact.

Write a menu for the week, do this when you've got a quiet time over the weekend & then tell the family from Monday it's going to start. I wouldn't bother weighing anyone, because as weight comes off, you'll see it.

Stick to 3 healthy meals & 2 snacks a day - cereal (will they eat porridge ? , semi skimmed milk, apple or pear slices

Snack, have a banana, a qood quality snack bar (goodies, eat naturals, or make small savory muffins)

Sandwiches (wholemeal bread), chicken/tuna/egg/cheese with cucumber slices, cherry tomatoes. Another piece of fruit or a yogurt ( I prefer the organic ones because they have, as well as organic milk, less variations of sugar)

Have a smoothie or more fruit after school.

For, ditch the meat, eat red/green/brown lentils in bolognese sauce, make your own tomato sauce (tin toms, tsp sugar, dried basil + onion). Use wholemeal pasta always. Brown basmati rice. Use natural yogurt instead of white sauce in lasagne.

You can still have puddings, cook fruit crumbles & have a small amount of cream (unless you buy a good quality ice cream)

Get the kids cooking oaty biscuits, little fairy cakes (made with butter)

The key thing is not to say we're on a diet, but to re-educate their tastes & they will (eventually) enjoy it.

Failing that, she can come & spend the week with me !!

just one little thing don't get too hung up on the measurements on the online guiding website (you mentioned in your original post) I am a scout leader and have to buy their uniform for myself and also for my dcs, I always have to buy one size larger than what I buy anywhere else in their trousers, the shape and cut is so wierd, and the same goes for my ds2 who is in an age 13 at age 10 because only an extremely skinny child actually fits into the right age.

i'm gonna send dh and dd1 to mojo for a week lol.

Hi misdee - think about what you've all been going through the past few years - it's hardly surprising if dd (or dh for that matter!) take a bit more comfort from food than they should.

Why not get her to up her exercise rather than worry too much about her food intake just yet.

Have a look at her Body Mass Index using this calculator that works for children as well as adults. She's only obese if it's 30 or more.

BMI calculator for kids

A weight of 30.4 kg and a height of 125 cm for an 8 year old child indicates that they are overweight. Being overweight as a child increases the risk of gaining too much weight in the future. However, children of this age are still growing in height, so they should not try to lose weight - just keeping their weight steady will make them thinner in time. Therefore the primary aim should be to slow down your child's weight gain.

You may think that your child looks no larger than other children his/her age - however, this could be because more children than ever before are becoming overweight.

REMEMBER:
. Children should not follow restrictive diets
. They should eat in a healthy and balanced way. This will help to ensure that they get all the nourishment that they need to grow and develop healthily and also help to control weight gain
. Being active will also help to control weight gain.

she needs to grow just 4cm taller to be considered in the healthy range.

phew!!!

panic over.

That's great!