Circumcision - 5 year old

[tomwill]

Hi, have any other mum's on MN had to face their little boys having to have this procedure on medical grounds (when he pees it goes in every direction and swells up at end of his little penis). Poor chap. Dr says it will be fine but I'm really anxious about him having this done.

How long will he be in hospital for? Will there be big bandages afterwards? And how will he pee after op? How long's the recovery? And will his penis hurt for days after?

Didn't want you to go unanswered. My stepson was done last year I think, similar reasons (family trait, DP and his father were also done, DP's was sealed at birth). I can't remember how he was with it, but I will talk to his dad in the morning.

My other stepson was born with aortic stenosis (some problem with the heart, can't remember exactly what it does) and has had to have a few ops for it. He said to his dad that they now have something in common, but he'd rather his heart was operated on than have that op! Bless.

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My Ds had it done aged 7. He was in first thing in the morning, then out that evening. No big bandages, very sore, you apply an antibiotic cream to the stitched area. He'll not want to wear clothes much for around 5 days or so. Ds says he's glad it was done as his foreskin was very tight.

If the foreskin is too tight it needs to be done and he will be better afterwards, though sore for a few days: can you stay home and basically let him run around bottomless?

I have cut and pasted this paragraph from a website here

Ballooning of the Foreskin
Ballooning of the foreskin while urinating can be a normal phase of development during childhood. It is not an indication for circumcision. Ballooning is a temporary phenomenon that arises when the foreskin begins to separate from the glans. It speeds the process of separation and disappears when the process is complete.

Maybe try the skin stretching bit of that website?

But it is very often not something they grow out of and they do need to retract the foreskin in order to clean it(or a parent to clean it)even at that age.
My nephews mother(incompetent 'mothering' at its best - another long story there)failed to get his problem sorted out for him(he has Asbergers)and he ended up ripping it back for himself because it was really bad, so now it is all scarred tissue and he's now 15, so it's unlikely to get sorted properly.
My friends son aged 2 kept getting infections and circumcision sorted it no problem...his little brother on the other hand had no problems whatsoever, so didn't need the op.
My own Ds started getting scar tissue and that's why he had the op along with the fact that it kept tearing which is really distressing for them. His father was circumcised aged 33 and he found it a dreadful experience...had all the nurses coming along to check his wound etc, which led to him getting an erection and that was both painful and embarrassing. Better to do it during childhood IMO.
I know there are many men and women that are against male circumcision, but if there is a problem that can be sorted out when they are children, surely that is better and far less embarrassing than it is for a grown man.

The foreskin should never be retracted forcibly, there is no need to clean under it until it comes back of it's own accord. I have this discussion so many times on American sites and you find that Americans don't tend to know how to look after intact boys because it's a new thing to keep them they tend to cause damage and end up being done anyway (then out comes the argument it would have been easier to have had it done in the first place [headdesk])

I'm against circumcision being done in the way it has been in America. I don't think anyone I know who is anticirc would say it shouldn't EVER be done even when there is a medical need.

Back to my DSS. His dad said he went in the day before so they could starve him, had the op early and was out later the same day. He was a bit sore going for a wee for awhile while it was bruised and was feeling a bit sorry for himself (I said was he licking his wounds and his dad looked horrified I did mean in the metaphorical sense of feeling sorry for himself). Apparently they had a father-son thing, his dad showed him his to show him it does get better etc and he declared his big brother was the odd one out!

No, not forcibly. And different medical personnel say different things. It should be retracted to be cleaned. It shouldn't, so who really knows. If my friend had been able to, her Ds1 wouldn't have had lots of infections...cest la vie.

It's been proven that retracting it before it's able to (which, yes, is forcibly) will cause it damage. Boys are born with it fused to the glans, to pull it back before it's ready is equivalent to pulling back their fingernail. It will happen sometime up to around 14 and if it hasn't already happened when they get to puberty it will soon happen as they masturbate.

There is plenty of modern evidence that the foreskin should not be forcibly retracted and the only "evidence" it should be are older HCPs who have always done it that way.

It shouldn't be cleaned at all.

Tell me, do you retract your foreskin to clean behind it?

tomwill - there is another more minor procedure, i think, called dorsal something or other - where a small cut is made to release the foreskin rather than cutting it off. if you feel anxious, ask for a second opinion.

But if it is medically necessary, I am sure the procedure will go well. No experience of circumcision, but plenty of a small child having medical procedures...your DS will be fine and spring back very quickly. But it is wrenching to see your child in hospital and you have my sympathy.

Agree Blu.
I cried when Ds had his GA, but I've just asked him now almost two years on and he says he's glad it was done, so if he's happy with that, so am I. Op, you'll know if it's right for your Ds or not. He'll be fine after a week and not even think about it after a month, though he may find it more sensitive until he's used to the new 'feel'.
The only thing I had to do besides apply the cream, was pull a stitch out that wasn't dissolving and was irritating him.

DS was circumcised when he was 6 for same reasons as your ds, tomwill.

The op itself was so quick he hardly seemed to be in there at all. It's horrible seeing your child anaesthetized - it was my 3rd time with ds but still hit me hard (and I'm pretty pragmatic about such things) - so don't be surprised if you seem to react more strongly than you thought you would - the staff expect it and will look after you!

He had the op in the morning and went home that afternoon. They like your child to have had a drink, a meal and a pee before they let them go home.

Afterwards he was a bit sore and didn't want to look at it, but peeing was fine (we let him pee in the bath at first - much more soothing!). It was the pulling up and down of his trousers rather than the actual peeing that worried him most.

He lived in baggy tracksuit bottoms and no underpants for a week or so, and was a bit 'sensitive' for quite a while, but he healed very quickly, and we didn't need to use any creams or anything.

The main side-effect was that, for months, he wouldn't look at his winky (family name for it - sorry if it's a bit cutesy!), as he thought it looked strange. We were very matter-of-fact and reassuring about it, but he did get a bit tearful sometimes and wish it was like it 'used to be in the olden days' , although he also freely admitted that it 'behaved' much better after the op. We were starting to wonder what to do about it, when one day he just shouted from his room, 'Mummy ! I'm looking at my winky!' - cue lots of hugs and a big treat, and after that he was fine - and he still is.

I'm really glad we had it done and so is he now. Hope this reassures you a bit

Thank you all so much for your messages. And Aniyan I love the family name 'Winky'!!!

I will certainly investigate a second opinion Blu.

Still absolutely dreading seeing my little boy under aneasthetic. Good advise about the trackie bottoms - I will definately get some ready.

Thanks all xx

Tomwill, my 3yo being 'done' tomorrow (for medical reasons). I have investigated alternatives and considered waiting longer but constant infections and antibiotics seem pretty damaging. Will let you know my top tips as I learn them! Think of me tomorrow.

on this topic, my ds who is 6 seems to have

oops