Asking for advice (again) re phoning in sick

[ByLimeAnt]

I'm really struggling with low ferritin levels (being investigated by excellent GP). I start work at 8 and by 10 I am crashing. I sleep at lunch, try and get through the afternoon then early bed. Today I was shit at work and I know it.

I'm also struggling with my MH (bipolar, stable for ages but tried to come off my antipychotic after discussion with my psychiatrist and turns out that was a big mistake).

Work know about physical but not MH (and have no intention of telling them).

Cons:
My manager will go into a flat spin due to our current workload.
Noone else is trained or qualified to do my job so it will end up in her plate
My probationary period is 6 months. I'm way past it but yet to have review meeting as they are pants less organised. Worried about being let go/pay issues.
I'm letting people down, especially my manager

Pros
I can't carry on like this but if I can rest I might be able to avoid another MH admission.

Advice and thoughts very gratefully received.

Don't think you should go in to work if you're in no state to do your job. Especially if ot is a responsible position without a lot of supervision. If you make a mistake at work or have an accident, you could be liable. It is much better to own up to the situation. I would also consider owning up to your mental health issues. If you think you could be heading towards an admission, how can you possibly keep it hidden?
There are legal protections against firing someone because of mental illness. It would be discrimination. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

If you don't have enough people to carry out your tasks if one of you is sick, that's a management issue and that's for them to sort out.

Thank you both for your responses, much appreciated.

If I make an error it's purely admin. Annoying but not critical.

I'm very good at masking. I was held on a section 135 once dressed to go to the office- no one at work had realised. I don't see any value in telling work about my MH. The adjustments I need, I have (work in a quiet location remotely).

I think my MH is spiralling partly because of the medication change and partly becuase I am so overwhelming fatigued.

I've had 2 jobs in the last 3 years and both precipitated an admission under section. I'm not going to say how many sections I've had. I try so damn hard to work and lead a normal life but sometimes I think I'm just too weak and lacking stamina. When I'm well I'm good at my job, I get promoted and get good results. Just can't sustain it.

Please feel free to be blunt with me. I just want to manage this and provide for my family

Yes- I've told them a million times to sort out their succession planning.

Bump please help

Are you taking high dose iron to try and get your ferritin up? Are you back on your meds? Just wondering how long this might last

You need to put yourself first, in this instance. It sounds like you really need time off while you get back up to the right level of medication for you.

Try to stop worrying about how your manager will cope, and cut yourself some slack.

Yes - your manager might go into a flat spin, but it’ll be a lower overall impact if you take appropriate sick leave when it’s first required rather than battle on for longer and crash harder. It sounds like you already know that for yourself.

Message to manager -

Hi,
As you know I’m really struggling with ferritin levels at the moment and not yet got things to a functional range. The impact is increasing and until get it under control I don’t think I’m safe to be at work. The likelihood of me collapsing on you is getting too high. I’m already going for lie downs at lunchtime and even thats barely helping.
I’ll finish off xyz this morning / show you where ….. is up to, get a lie down so I’ve got enough energy to head home and then head home. Still working with GP on a solution, but feels like it’s going to take more than a couple of days to get back to a properly functional level. I’ll be in touch with an update after next speak to GP.

take the time off , your health and wellbeing are more important x

Short term - call in sick for rest of the week (handing over where you are at is a thoughtful touch).
Long term - are you in an industry you can do contracting, maybe an average of 6 months of the year?

Thank you SO much for replying, my head is lost, my psychiatrist is the only person I've told and I'm trying desperately to hide the fact that I'm spiralling and I don't want to worry my mum. Yes, back on medication and saw psychiatrist and he doubled it today... won't be instant though. He wanted to get the home treatment team in but i have not had good experiences with them. He also said i was heading towards another psychotic episode which scared me I hate my condition so much. It takes so much away from you and the stigma is huge.

Yes to high dose iron. I really want an iron infusion as apparently that's much quicker. I've got a GP appointment tomorrow morning and will bring it up.Unfortunately I'm seeing the crap GP not my normal one.

Thank you again to everyone, especially the kind poster who drafted a message for me. I'm still very open for any advice. I think I'm going to ring the CMHT in the morning anyway because I'm not doing ok

You need to stay on your meds. Strongly suspect you may have a pattern of being sectioned, getting ‘cured’ ie stabilised. Come home. Resume life. Come off meds because you feel well, then eventually spiral and unwell again. OP with kindness and care you need to stay on your meds. Your condition is long term and recurring - the sections tell me that. Be kind and proactive = stay on your meds. Good luck.

Get yourself signed off to give yourself some breathing space. This isn’t right but when I’ve been honest about mental health struggles at work it has hugely backfired on me, so I would keep some information to yourself. I do hope you feel better soon x

@DoloresDelEribayou are absolutely right. The thing is, i'm actually really good at my job when I'm well. I just can't sustain it. I cycle about every 6 months and I hate being on so many medications (antipychotic, x2 mood stabilisers, antidepressants, beta blocker, diazepam). That was why I wanted to stop the antipychotic- psychiatrist was on board with trying with caution.

Saw the crap GP today about my iron levels. He told me I shouldn't be that tired with ferritin of 12 and it was due to my MH. And because i am "emotional ". So I bawled my eyes out to my mum on the phone in the car park.

Not before I told him that he needed to read "Unheard" by Dr Rageshri Dhairyawan though.

I hate this. I hate bipolar, I hate that if affects every part of my life when I'm trying so goddamn hard to keep it all together.

And I hate that ECT helps. It's horrible, it's demeaning... and it bloody well works for me. Lay time I was sectioned the ward psychiatrist said there would be no discussion next time and straight to ECT.