Spincter injury, fistula - support eachother?

[Cyee]

Hi everyone,

Wonderful weather we're having

I am propped up in bed post-hospital and I was wondering if anyone out there knows of, or would enjoy/benefit from, a thread or support site for people who have experienced the above (sphincter damage, fistula etc.) as a result of childbirth.

In my own experience, this whole area is a bit taboo. In fact the consultants reckon there are many women who have some symptoms related to the above, who never seek treatment. The thought of women embarrassed to discuss these matters is awful, yet that seems to be the case.

So - this (while souped up on painkillers) is a call to arms:

• Is there a site out there for women like us?
• If not, would you like there to be?
• Would a thread on MN especially for this, be useful?
• Would it be useful to share experiences with consultants/physios/hospitals/procedures?

If these matters resonate with you or anyone you know, it would be great if you could point them in this direction. I'm going to post in the 'health' and 'childbirth' sections too.

I know too well the taboo around this. I posted on MN when I got my diagnosis and used a different name...

Hope to hear from some people soon.

Cyee
(successfully repaired as of last Wednesday (fingers/legs crossed))

it sounds gross but here goes
it is where your rectum basially falls into your vagina because of very weak vaginal muscles. it can cause many problems especially problems going to 'poo'. some ladies have to manually help themselves to get it out by pushing the bulge back in . very unpleasent but needs must.

it can show as a bulge coming out of your vagina.

I asked what the surgery involved and i was told i was cut inside down the vaginal wall and externally along the perineam. the rectum was then dissected and push back to where it was meant to be then stitched in place then the skin on the vaginal wall was 'trimmed' (not sure if it was a short back and sides haha) and stitched together. they then carried on stitching down and then externally.

see told you it sounds gross. Mine was a large one to so dont know if that means it was a larger area or what does anyone else know.

OMG kentmumj, "short back and sides", I am PMSL!!! Since my pelvic floor still isn't as strong as I'd like it to be I will leave it to your imagination whether I mean that literally or not!

kentmumtj have you tried sitting on a "Rubber-ring"? Have your DC's got an old one,or can you borrow one?

It might help redistribute the "pressure".

Yes I would say thats normal to be sore when sitting,I did get sore,especially in the first couple of weeks.Nothing helped much,except changing position,Salt baths,and going to bed.

It gets less sore each day.

I'm now 5 weeks post op. but still have a slight discharge.Just finished my 2nd week of Antibiotics,which were specific ones to the infection.

My Rectocele seemed to be less severe,just a weakness in the muscle wall,so it was "prolapsing" or leaning into the wall of my vagina.

I didn't have any External repair or stitches,just internal.

I didn't have a Tear (AFAIK)just an Episiotomy,and then another Traumatic Ventouse delivery 8 years after,with another Episiotomy.

sawyer - i have thought about the rubber ring and i dont have any old ones my youngest is 8 now. My friends all have children old enoug to swim, howeer i might edn one of them to the shop to buy me one as it may help as im sick of being on my side or lying down.

has you infection gone? Can i ask you how you knew you had one in the bgegining?

Jacksmama - apparently i will be brand new down there after all of this, so my hubby may if hes lucky be in for a good time if i ever get to doing 'things' like that again.

Lol at "things". I too am hoping for a fantastic designer vagina after all this shit. I suspect DH is just trying not to hope too much .

Now that I would like ThingOne!

kentmumtj - thanks for the explanation. you really have my sympathies. I am torn with being relieved my consultant said surgery is not an option as what you are going through sounds so rough to say the least! but disappointed too I suppose as I would love to get it fixed
Sawyer64 - can I ask what your symptoms were. Or should I read further back, sorry if I am asking you guys to repeat yourselves!
Not sure if I am turning into a hypocondriac (sp?) but I feel so let down I am worried I'm not getting all the answers and want to make sure I have really been checked out.. I can feel a small bluge in my vagina that I don't remember always being there...

PMSL at the short back and sides!!

Ref the rubber ring, I hired one of those Valley Cushions that the NCT and others hire out. It's basically an adult rubber ring Designed to let you sit without pressure on the perineum. I also took a while to be able to sit for long on my tush. I was reclining (should really have got a chaise longue!) for a good few weeks after the op.

As for... ah... DOING IT My DH claims its as 'good' as before baby if not better. So bring on the designer vaginas!

Interesting about your mum also having had a rough experience Bubblejet. Mine also had a rough time, and so I wonder if connective tissue or other inherited issues have contributed to these situations...

Have a good evening all!

kentmumtj Not sure if my infection is gone yet,although it should be,as I've had 2 lots of strong Antibiotics now.

I guess i suspected I had an infection as I was quite uncomfortable and the bleeding was discoloured ie. not red,and the odour wasn't pleasant.

All these things could have been "normal" though as it is obviously sore for quite a while,and the bleeding does change colour,and the odour of blood isn't pleasant,and one you "forget" when you use Tampons I guess. But as I'm a nurse,I took a swab and got the results sent to my surgery,and the nurse contacted me re: the result.

Bubblejet My "symptoms" were just that I was having difficulty pooing,(pushing it out) a little like my labours really All push and no action!!

When I used a Tampon I felt like I was pushing it backwards and horizontle IYSWIM

Needless to say things didn't feel "right" with sex either.

Cyee..hellooo!...Think you could be right about the "tendency to tear" might be heriditary,but I guess the way you carry,and how big your pelvis is etc. is also heriditary and would affect your labour.

Lucky you getting things back to normal.I'm dreading looking forward to 6 weeks+ when things should have healed. At the moment though I can still feel stitches,hope that will change by then.

I'm curious what will happen when I see my surgeon on April 1 for my check-up. As I've never seen any stitches come out yet, I wonder if they all obediently dissolved.

Also wondering [slightly quivering emoticon] if she'll tell me it's okay to "do the deed" again... DH would be ecstatic if yes, I'm not so sure. We waited four months after I had Jackbaby and my God, it was painful! Much, much worse than way back when I was a virgin. So, I'm not expecting this time to be much better. Although maybe it will be since the recovery from the op was so much better than from Jackbaby's birth. I know for sure I wasn't even walking upright yet whe he was 5 1/2 weeks old, was still crabbing along with teeny-tiny steps, hunched over like an old crone.

I have been giving a lot of thought to putting in a complaint about the OB who left me to push for four hours and then did such a shit job sewing me up (missing a 2" tear in the pelvic floor muscle, FFS - where did she get her training, on a weekend course???). On the one hand, I'd like it on record how badly she messed me up. On the other hand, I just don't know if I can face revisiting it all.

I hear you Jacksmama that is exactly how I feel. Its funny hearing someone else say it makes me really want to encourage you to make complaint - how many other mums could she be messing up? But yes what puts me off doing it myself is having to go over all the gory details... its a tough one.

Thanks Sawyer64, I seem to go from one extreme to another and i think I need a good biology lesson to really understand. I either can't control my poo and its accident city (guessing this is outer muscle). Or if I am trying to poo its like its there and I can't get it all out - completely getting your all push no action comment! so thinking this is the inner muscle. My consul (is there an abb I should be using for this!) showed me my ultrasound and pointed out the 2 muscles so maybe it does depend how far down the poo is - sorry really is TMI

thanks again though guys this is doing me the world of good!

No problem Bubblejet. Just glad you've found somewhere to share this "TMI".

Repeat to self: "no TMI on this thread, no TMI on this thread"...

sawyer - i to had an infection nasty smelly discharge have only needed one course of antibi and i guess its alright as im not noticing it anymore
an i have another rather embarassing question to ask guys so here goes im noticing that when i need to go 'poo' i have to go immediatly i get the sensation. I didnt have this problem befre the op. Could this just be a normal part of the healing process.

cyee i did contemplate telling my work i was going to have a designer vagina but didnt, lol could you have imagined the stares when i do go back lol how funny.

as for stictches i havent noticed any coming out at all should i see them soon?

This thread does cheer me up and make me laugh thanks guys

I'm beginning to think that,based on my very dated Theatre experience,that depending on the surgeon and the extent of repair,it may affect the type of stitching done.

Not being a surgeon ofcourse,I am guessing here,that they may use a continuous (sp?)stitch,in which case there probably wouldn't be any stitches to come out,if they were "interrupted" stitches,they'd be individual ones that would then come out maybe.

kentmumtj My urge to go seemed much more urgentin the beginning,but only when my bowel was full.Initially it was a bit "Rabbit dropping-like" ie. constipated,and that still didn't want to be passed,and I was very tender and nervous to strain IYSWIM.

Kentmum, I am 5 1/2 weeks post-op (Feb 9) and have not had any stitches come out either.

As for the "no warning, must poo now" - I had that after I had Jackbaby. It was horrible!! Fortunately my first cup of coffee in the morning usually gets things going, but there was many a time when I had to break off mid-conversation and rush off to the loo (praying I was in time). It's not too bad now but I still get anxious when I have an upset stomach because holding in wind or diarrhoea is much more difficult than holding in a solid stool.

One thing I've noticed (found this whilst washing in the shower, and also when using a suppository) is that my anal muscle tone is much slacker than it used to be. What I mean is that the anal ring just feels much softer and slacker - not like the tightly pursed "cat's bum" it used to be. I suppose that's nerve damage - I wonder if it will ever recover.

ouch ouch ouch ouch

im crossing my legs wishing everything was 'normal' again lol.
i today felt good. I decided to hang my washing out and jumped off a wall. then spent the rest of the day lying down with painkillers. I am feeling quite sore and am hoping ive not caused any damage as it doesnt feel right. maybe ive just done too much too soon.

i did have a continuous stich now come to think of it so i guess thats why i havent seen any and i guess i wont.

jacksmama - what did you have done (im being to lazy to read through the thread. and is there no op they can to to re tighten that particular area.

i hope i feel completly normal again very soon and for all you guys as well......oh to be a man

I had a wedge resection of my vagina to excise the horrendous scar left by an equally horrendous tear, as DS was yanked out delivered with forceps after 36 hours of labour and 4 hours of fruitless pushing. He was stuck solid with his head crooked. Which they knew 16 hours into my labour.
The OB who stitched me did a shit job, and missed a huge gap in the underlying muscle, so I've had no pelvic floor to speak of for a year.
But should be all fixed now. Hopeful anal tone will regenerate over time.

Lie down woman and quit jumping off walls!!!!!!!!!

Jacksmama did you have that prob post babies pre op or is it just post op? That is exactly what I am like and is a result of third degree tear - so where you tear goes into that muscle. I know you had really bad tear was it 3rd degree? I always thought 2nd, 3rd degree etc meant how bad the tear was but learnt its about where it tears. A 3rd degree (if spotted and repaired at the time grrrr) can be a lot simpler than a very bad second degree tear. Apologies if I am repeating what everyone on this thread knows anyway! was a bit of a revelation to me!

and yes - jumping of walls!!! you crazy lady kentmumj! you're just trying to show off now! If I did that it would be fart city!

I had my incontinence problem after I had DS. My tear was an undiagnosed 3rd degree. They thought it was "only" a second-degree. fuckwits

Don't know anything about specific "Anal Nerves" but IIRC nerves can take anything up to a year to repair/heal if they are going to.

I've just started bleeding again tonight.I've had a tummyache all day,had last period on 6.03.09,but now confused....

Have I done something internally?

Or am I having another period 2 weeks after the last???

Its not heavy,but bright red.Time will tell I guess.Still haven't seen a doc since my Op though.

Don't know what to say - I don't know of any way to tell a period from other bleeding.

Sorry for unhelpful post

Don't worry Jacksmama,wasn't really looking for answers.I will know I guess from length of bleed,and colour etc.

Guess your cycle hasn't been affected then?