Cancer diagnosis - Can i ask- how do you tell people?

[wontbepreggersagain]

Please help, i have only just found out, this morning in fact, i have downloded lots of information but can't quite work out how i am supposed to tell people, i haven't told my husband yet, i'm dreading it, i can't quite see how the conversation is going to go:

"hello love, good day at work, i've got cancer, but here's some information off the net"

equally as it is a non-invasive cancer (DCIS) can i get away with not telling people?

I honestly wasn't expecting the diagnosis this morning- if i had even thought it was possible i would have taken dh with me, now i'm in a position where i can't find the words to tell him or my parents or even my closest friends!

You must still be in shock. Take a bit of time just to get your head around it. You don't have to tell people if you don't want to and I don't think there's ever an easy way. Don't give hubby the info off the net, he won't be able to take it in. Wait until you have some time alone, if he knows you've had an appointment and asks about it just be brave and tell him that it didn't go as you expected it to. Tell him that they can sort it out and that it is a non-invasive cancer. You don't have to tell anyone else unless you feel up to it. One at a time.

I'd send you a massive hug if I could.

Poor you. I am afraid that I don't have any good advice but I did not want you to be ignored.

Did your husband know you had tests? If so can you say yo ugot your test results back today and they show a form of cancer, but to panic as it is a pretty "good" form of cancer?

I think you need to tell some people because you will need the support and they will want the oppurtunity to support you .

Wish I had an answer for you. Big hugs from March08 board. xxxx

wontbepreggersagain

How are you? I see there has been quite a bit of time between posts.

Would you like to talk about it now?

My Nan dropped it in the conversation very casually when she told me cancer had come back and I am sure she thought I already knew.

I would say, I have had some tests and I have cancer. Leading up to it or beating about the bush, is worse than the actual telling imo.

Oh sweetheart

I can't remember your email address, have been trying to find you to see how you are in general for a few weeks now .

I can't say I hope you're ok, because I very much doubt you are!!! I am always here if you want to unload

xxx

Sorry to hear this.

My dh knew I was having tests so he said how did it go? It was awful telling him as he was away but I needed him and I imagine you need your dh too.

Other than my mum and close friends I only told people as I saw them, if I felt like it. People would say Oh, I didn't know but it's not the sort of thing you ring round as an announcement is it?

I think when you see close friends and parents it tends to come out or it did with me as I just burst into tears. I had dreaded it but was so relieved to have their support.

You need and deserve support now.

(((preggars))) xxxxxxxxxxxx sending much love and strength xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sorry to hear your news Preggers - hope you've managed to tell your dh. There's no easy way to break the news and I think it's harder for others to deal with than yourself.

Look after yourself.

{{{preggers}}}, hope you're surrounded by positive people as the last thing you need now is any negativity. Keep focussing on the fact that it's very treatable, tell people if you want to but remember we're here for you when you need us.
x

I had the same diagnosis last August. It is a horrible shock. I couldn't quite believe it when I was introduced to a paliative care nurse. I was alone when I found out, so it was odd going home and telling dh that I had been diagnosed with cancer. In fact I was terrified. Anyway, I had a mastectomy and reconstruction and the team are very very nice. I have my next check-up in a couple of months.

I was told by the surgeon NOT to look up too much on the internet because it would only serve to worry myself. There is a breast cancer thread on here - do join in. You are not alone!

breast cancer support thread