My dad has just had a major op to have a melanoma removed from his head. I feel very low.

[Gingerbear]

He was diagnosed with malignant melanoma just a couple of weeks ago. It started with a small brown patch on his head, and it has grown to 3 inches diameter in days. He had a CT scan on Tuesday and today he had a 4 hour operation to remove it, along with a number of smaller cancers surrounding the main one. Haven't seen him yet, but mum says he is on morphine but still in a lot of pain . They needed to take a large piece of skin from his thigh and graft it onto his head. They have also taken away the lymph nodes in his neck below his right ear. I am going to see him tomorrow. I am praying he manages to get some rest tonight.
I have just spoken to mum. She is shattered and weepy- they have been up since 5am, and she got back from the hospital at 8pm. I can't even go over to her house as the kids are in bed and DH isn't home from work until 1030.

So sorry to hear this Ginger...sending you hugs...xxx

Wow that sounds really tough gingerbear. Fingers crossed for a speedy recovery.

It's so hard not being there but he's doing the right thing having the surgery and the first 24 hours is always the worst.

Try and stay calm and optimistic. These things can work out. Fingers crossed for you

Thanks for your support. I feel so helpless, I wish I could kiss it better. (DD said, 'I am going to kiss grandad better')

You are not helpless. I know it can seem that way but keeping your dad's spirits up. Being able to go see him and cheer him up will actually improve his immune system and aid his recovery. A positive mental attitude really can help healing.

Take your mum for a cup of tea and bun at the hospital cafe and talk about ANYTHING else for ten minutes though, she'll have been through the mill a lot too today

I will, I think they both need lots of support. Mum is one of those folk who is always thinking of others, never herself. She hasn't even let herself cry.

Hello Darling.

'Tis LGJ

My DDad had his bladder removed last October, he is now as fit as a flea.

I had all my lymph nodes removed on the left side of my neck when I was 30. Did you really miss that huge scar on my neck. ??(Marks GB down as a true friend)

His nerve endings, will grow back, some of them may reconnect randomly, if I scratch my back in a certain place I feel it in my neck.

He will be fine.

Much love

LGJ

XXX

Thank you all, thank you so much.

LGJ, what scar? I thought that was where the bolts had been removed The doc has told dad that his eyebrow will be fixed (as though he has had botox, lol) and as you have said, the nerves may partially repair. Dad even managed a joke about having a french polish to his head now instead of a haircut.

Ah Ginger,poor you.
Sounds harrowing.
I'd get the children working on some nice get well cards to cheer him up when they visit.

sorry to hear that gingerbear
my mum had an op on her arm to remove melanoma a year ago, also lymph glands removed and tested but luckily it hadn't spread there, despite mole being fairly large and 'well established' as gp had not referred her for a year beforehand (a whole other story)
it is a scary time
will be thinking of you all

good idea moondog.
Morocco - does your mum have to have regular checks now? Dad will have to wear SPF 50 cream daily from now on, and never go out without a hat.

my mum has checks every few months and they are very careful about any moles, she had a few more removed afterwards as a precaution but was fine. she is not as careful as she should be about sunscreen either, I go mad at her to keep it covered up (is on lower arm so that would mean long sleeves in summer). she didn't tell me she was using fake tan either so one time I went mental when she turned up looking all brown
how is your dad doing?

I have been to see him Saturday and again today. Yesterday he was exhausted, and very down as he hadn't been able to have a wash or a shave. They had catheterised him as the shock from the op had made him unable to pee!! His pain was OK until last night when he had the mightiest headache, and for several reasons he was only able to take paracetamol for pain relief. So not much sleep. Today he has been catnapping, had had a wash and a shave and seemed much better, but still had the headache and catheter. Hopefully the catheter will be removed tonight. He was really pleased to see DD - she made a lovely card and did some drawings for him
My sister took mum out for Sunday lunch - she needed a break. She has gone to see him again this evening.
Fingers crossed he will be out Tuesday.

poor thing
bet your dd cheered him up no end, can't beat a lovely grand daughter with home made card for putting a smile on a grandad's face
hope he is doing better tomorrow