Advice please - DD age 2.9 holding her wee in ALL Day - we're both stressing about it now

[debbiewebweb]

DD2 who is 3 in July, is not really potty trained - well that is she doesn't really use the potty or toilet - but she has has now stopped weeing in her pull ups or nappy unless she's asleep. She'll wake in the morning with a wet nappy and once its taken off she'll wear pants if we are staying in or pull ups if its school run or work day nursery. But after a few hours when she wants a wee she'll start running around, crossing her legs, crying, holding herself - anything but actually wee. Some days she goes right up til bedtime when she will finally wee on the toilet or potty or nappy after what seems like hours of crying / moaning about wanting a wee
We've tried the reading a book on the toilet, watching the tv on the potty, singing songs, giving her privacy, giving her cuddles, even offering bribes in desperation - any advice / experience please

Relax - if she sees you getting stressed it will cause her to be anxious.

She may not yet be ready to potty train, let her go back to nappies then try again in a months time but be very calm and relaxed about it all.

We plan to potty train DD2 this summer as she is showing signs of being ready, however if it doesn' worh tne we'll put her back in nappies and try again at a later stage.

I'd back off on the potty training for now, but also take her to GP to check for urinary tract infections - if its stinging or sore when she wees, there may be a physical reason for her holding on?

It sounds as though she's scared of weeing for some reason, and I'd check that out first. Good luck, sounds upsetting for both of you

I'm happy for her to wear nappies as I would rather that than have her stressed, but she doesn't want to wear them and if she does even in nappies she will not wee without crying and stressing first.

sorry elibean, missed your post. I agree, I think she's scared she says it feels funny but doesn't hurt and to be honest when she finally does let it flow by mid flow she's grinning from ear to ear - with relief probably. I've put her to bed for a nap - hoping she'll have a wee whilst she's asleep. Perhaps it is an infection and I guess that gets more likely if she continues to hold it in (or is that an old wives tale .

I wouldn't put her back in nappies. If she can hold on for ages, she is 'toilet trained' even tho' she's reluctant to go.

I would definitely get her checked out at GP.

Is she happy to sit on the toilet/potty? Could you take her regularly throughout the day - or when you go - for a couple of minutes of just sitting there and under no pressure to wee? E.g.You could be on the toilet and she could be on the potty.

I hesitate to suggest running a tap to get her started, tho' it does work. My Mum did this to me and now the sound of a running tap has me nearly wetting myself .