If you have / know about misaphonia can you give me some advise please?

[ontheedgeofwhatever]

DS says that he's really struggling with the noise in school (there's a lot else going on but this is about noise) We are not sure if he's got misaphonia - he's not bothered by chewing noises for example but something is certainly bothering him. He does get upset if anyone brushes their teeth near him though.

The thing is that the school say that often he's reacting in what is actually a quiet room - i.e. nobody is talking.

Is it possible that he's being triggered by people breathing or sniffing or coughing (that time of year) and if so what on earth can we do about it? I mean we can hardly say people should stop breathing in his vicinity.

I am honestly at a loss

How old is your son?

I suffer from misophonia. It could be anything. My "rage" is triggered by clicking noises in particular, and squeaky noises in addition. So a teacher walking on a squeaky floorboard with a clicky pen would just make me NEED to run from the room.
You need to work out his triggers and how to minimise both them and his reaction to them.

Once I realised it was a me problem it got easier to handle.
Refocusing on a physical activity can help... touching each fingertip in turn whilst concentrating on the task etc.
Now I'm old (60) it is a LOT easier... tinnitus smooths out the trigger sounds quite a bit.

my daughter developed misophonia as she entered puberty which is fairly classic.
Quiet environments are actually worse as triggers tend to be breathing, sniffing, clicking, chewing or other mouth noises,nail biting, scratching, just any' bodily' noises. Sometimes repetitive movements also trigger line jiggling legs etc.
With misophonia you get an irrational rage and fight or flight symptoms. It is very distressing.
Our son has some sensory issues with certain materials that he cannot wear and he cannot bear the sound of brushing. He is definitely neurodiverse but if he has misophinia, he copes better with it or is not so affected.

My 9 year old daughter has this. It is definitely possible that he could be affected by sneezing and coughing and sniffling - it is a very common trigger and makes them very angry and frustrated. As silly as it sounds, certain breathing can affect it too. Heavy breathers annoy my DD to the extent that it makes her cry. She also gets upset at the sound of people brushing their teeth but her main issue is eating.

Your son might have it if it clearly presents itself as something much bigger than normal annoyance. It's not just a little irritance at a heavy breather, it is genuine rage and upset.

It's really difficult to get help for this. DD is allowed noise cancelling headphones due to her anxiety as she gets overwhelmed and she is allowed to leave the classroom to go to the quiet room but it can still be difficult as she obviously can't do this all the time.

Sounds Like Misophonia by Dr Jane Gregory is an excellent book and very helpful. It's not a very well understood disorder at the moment, unfortunately but this explains it well and has some good suggestions for coping with it.

Yes what will seem quiet or innocuous to the teacher can be hell for a misophonia sufferer. Even certain breathing or sniffing or throat clearing can be horrific.

I would just try to ensure the teacher understands it’s a real condition and just how distressing it can be for people who suffer. It can provoke an intense desire to escape and the reaction can make other people feel very judged and defensive which then provokes shame feelings in the person suffering. I think he needs to know there’s a quiet space he can retreat to when needed, or see if wearing ear plugs or noise cancelling earphones could be an option for the periods in his class when he doesn’t need to be listening to the teacher ?

headphones is basically the only way I’ve managed to survive office environments or public transports. That and being able to wfh. Remembering back to working in an office 5 days a week with no headphones fills me with dread…. Every time someone ate or chewed gum it was agony. It definitely is better as I’ve got older and found some coping strategies - although they do say there’s no cure. So I’d focus on ensuring those around him understand him.

I too can recommend the book Sounds Like Misaphonia. Our DD was affected dreadfully by coughing, sniffing, eating and even breathing. It's caused huge problems in the family but we've all had to adjust and headphones have been a godsend.

Quite possibly. My daughter has autism & is triggered massively by clicking pens in a quiet room, especially in exams. My partner has misaphonia and can't handle me eating any crunchy food. I personally hate when someone eats a banana or the squeak from a balloon makes me feel sick. We are all neuro divergent so likely connected to that for us. Sometimes it really is a specific noise

I have misophonia, so does my DD. Eating sounds are the worst - we both can't stand hearing people chew, slurp, swallow etc. It makes us both angry, frustrated and snappy. So when we have dinner she puts on her headphones and I turn up the radio so can't hear my DH crunch. We avoid eating anything crunchy in front the tv as our evenings would be pretty miserable.

Speak to the class teacher and the SENCO possibly.
It's quite common for certain children to wear ear defenders to help them concentrate, this could possibly help your son. He could have auditory processing problems as well as misophonia.

Thank you for all these amazing responses they're really helpful. We just couldn't understand how anquiet classroom could be too noisy but I'm starting to see it now.

@gano Ds is 12 in year 8

Take a look at loop earplugs. They block out background noise but let voices through

Yes, Loop are brilliant and there are different types to choose from.

I’m a teacher with misophonia and can totally relate to your son’s feelings about quiet rooms. For me sniffing and the clicking of pens are the worst things - as someone else has said, it does tend to get a bit easier with age. I know quite a few students who have found the Loop earbuds really helpful - definitely worth a try. A chat with the SENDCO would also be a good idea. Please tell your son that he is very much not alone!

My son is autistic, no misophonia. Sensory Processing Disorder would fit what you've described. Mine can't deal with ticking clocks, fans, computer charging trolleys, strip lights, clicking keyboards, all things that most people wouldn't notice. His exam arrangements are to have none of those things in the room!

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