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Original poster

Dh at the Hospice

57 replies

Blandmum · 15/04/2008 13:55

Well, I took him back to the hospice this morning and with luck they will sort out some of his more distressing symptoms, in particular the pain, which is really wearing him down at the moment.

We are very Lucky, he has a beautiful side room, this time with a lovely balcony over looking the garden. It is nice and sheltered, so we got to sit out for a little while. They try to give us a side room, so that we can have a little privacy, with the kids etc. He has his own TV, with a DVD player, so I've been told to bring in series 2 of the Sopranos and Band of Brothers

The amusing thing is that twice he was mistaken for a visitor....for a dying man he is in remarkably good shape. This was a source of some black humour for us all.

As I left him, he was tucking into his 3 course lunch, and his doctor had told him that he would happily wait until DH had finished eating before he did the first assessment. they really are amazing there, and we are very forturate to have access to it.

If I'm honest I could use a few days respite from seeing him in pain all day and night.

OP posts:

Peachy · 15/04/2008 17:14

Your Dh is pretty fab isn't he? You both have some serious bottle to keep going all the time, and I really admire that- but am also glad you have gifted yoursef some time, none of us are able to carry the world for ever.

corblimeymadam · 15/04/2008 17:15

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Swedes · 15/04/2008 17:23

Mb - sending good wishes to you and your family.

suedonim · 15/04/2008 17:40

and MB. I'm sorry that your dh is having such pain but glad he can find somewhere that caters so well to his needs. I've been feeling 'poor me' today as I also have a headache, but I'd be happy to take on your headache as well, in a heartbeat, if I could.

Your mention of MrMB looking like a Dr, not a patient, puts me in mind of a tale I heard today which your dh might laugh at. A friend was telling me about her student nurse days in a psychiatric hospital, when she and another new nurse were detailed off to bathe a reluctant patient. He fought like a lion, claiming he was the deputy director of the hospital, to which she replied 'Yes and I'm a monkey's uncle.' Having more-or-less stripped him of his clothes, a third nurse burst in and shouted at them to leave the man alone. He really was the deputy director!!!!!

Califrau · 15/04/2008 17:48

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brimfull · 15/04/2008 17:48

MB -hope you're dh is pain free atm.

I worked in a hospice for a while as a student nurse,it was really an uplifting and cheery place to be ,which really surprised me.

Glad you're all getting the best care.

Christie · 15/04/2008 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pinkchampagne · 15/04/2008 17:52

Hope they can help your DH with his pain, MB. It sounds like a lovely place, and you & your DH are remarkable people.x

Original poster

Blandmum · 15/04/2008 18:03

Just come back from visiting him with the kids at the end of their school day.

The hospice is very welcoming of families and has a toy box and a play corner, the helpers offered the kids home made biscuits and juice.

Ds was fine but dd wants dh to be home and was a bit tearful, which is understandable. Ds did his homework there which helped to 'normalise' things a little.

They are sending dh for an Xray tomorrow and are looking into his symptoms. I feel fairly sure they will let him home for the weekend, if not before.

In some ways dh is a little vexed, because he feels they could do all of this on an outpatient basis, but the Macmillan nurse wanted him to be admitted, and I feel happier that if they are changing things, like his anti emetics, and it all goes horribly wrong, there are medical staff on had to get things sorted out quickly. Dh does see that too, but understandibly wants to be home asap, well we all do.

But he is in, reasonably comfortable and I'll visit him again tomorrow

OP posts:

notjustmom · 15/04/2008 18:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cocolepew · 15/04/2008 18:07

enjoy your spa day and hope your dh is comfortable xxx

PandaG · 15/04/2008 18:09

with my love and best wishes as always MB. Enjoy your spa day, and hoping and praying that Mr MB continues to Exceed all Expectations

ahundredtimes · 15/04/2008 18:09

Yes, it must be frustrating for him, but you are both right about being in the right place especially if it isn't for long.

'as they say at Hogwarts' made me LOL.

And you got the homework done.

Important Anti-Headache day tomorrow I think. You are allowed to shout PLEASE TURN OFF THE RELAXING MUSIC as that really doesn't help.

Massage.
Swim.
No more Enya.

Original poster

Blandmum · 15/04/2008 18:11

We do the Hogwarts gag because the dining hall was filmed in our collage. I always tease the kids that I was in Ravenclaw but that dady was a hufflepuff

OP posts:

Blu · 15/04/2008 18:11

The hospice makes absolute sense for times like this, MB - if medication is changing...and the Macmillan nurse knows, too, that it's not just the marking you can't do with a headache. A little respite for you has to be part of the process of keeping things good for all of you.

Enjoy the spa - and I hope the pain and change of emetics are all dealt with smoothly and succesfully.

WanderingTrolley · 15/04/2008 18:12

Hope MrMB is home very soon, and you have a lovely spa day.

Might I suggest MrMB dons a white coat a hangs a stethoscope around his neck? Just to wind up confuse folk further, you understand.

Blu · 15/04/2008 18:12

I have dinner in that Hogwarts Hall once a year - will think of you from now on!

TheMadHouse · 15/04/2008 18:14

MB - I just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you.

I hope that MrMB keeps exceeding expectations and that they make things more tolerable for him and that you enjoy your spa day

ahundredtimes · 15/04/2008 18:14

My dcs always say I would be in Hufflepuff. I am very put out about it and have campaigned for Ravenclaw for years now.

Have you arranged for someone to pound your shoulders tomorrow? I wish you would.

Original poster

Blandmum · 15/04/2008 18:17

I have deep tissue massage booked and a facial. So I will be too relaxed to drive home!

This is a christmas gift, and I've only just got around to getting it sorted!

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yurt1 · 15/04/2008 18:19

I'm not surprised he's mistaken for a visitor. He is quite amazing.

Hope the deep tissue massage is wonderful and really hope dh is home with you all soon. xx

MoreSpamThanGlam · 15/04/2008 18:20

mB - it seems like you too are exceeding all expections.

I nursed my grandfather at my home until he passed away and I have to say that its the pain that I couldnt handle. I could do the washing and wiping and cokking and cleaning but the pain is so unbearably frustrating. I had fabulous help from a hospice at home team who were there at a moments notice if need be.

Im really pleased that you are having a spa day, sounds like you need it!

Pixiefish · 15/04/2008 18:20

Thinking of you all HMB

Original poster

Blandmum · 15/04/2008 18:21

The pain is awful, since even when it is mosrly controled he groans with discomford, and it quite awful to hear.

Poor love.

OP posts:

ahundredtimes · 15/04/2008 18:23

Yes, sounds awful, for everyone. Are they going to try and sort that at the hospice? Best case scenario?

Good on deep tissue massage. That's the one.

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