NHS don't care when you're an overweight woman

[TheSilenceisDeafening]

I just need a rant. Is anyone else sick of trying to get help via the NHS and not being listened to or taken seriously because you're woman and overweight.

I've been told to exercise and loose weight, because somehow being fat is the root of all my problems and nothing else is to be considered as a cause, so I've been dismissed again. I'm not massively overweight, 14st.

Yes I understand extra weight can cause problems. Until recently, I was always a healthy weight (Even then I wasn't taken seriously) I've only gained weight due to meds, used to control a separate problem. One that developed because doctors repeatedly dismissed my concerns.

Why are woman treated so poorly in the NHS? This has been an issue for me my whole life. I've had a few serious issues that could have easily been resolved before they reached a critical stage, if only they had listened to what I was telling them.

I have a feeling that my most recent issue will also reach a critical stage soon because all doctors see is a fat hysterical woman and dismiss me at every opportunity. Why do doctors in this country want to prove you wrong, rather than finding out if what you're telling them is right?
I have no idea where to go from here so I'll just need to suffer on, feeling miserable and unheard.

I agree. They hate women anyway, and if you’re overweight you’re not worthy of respect. But wait until you’re old! Then you’ll have the full bingo card of what the NHS least care about.

Thank you for replying. I'm so upset today because my health and life are in the hands of people that don't give a shit. I feel powerless and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it.

I can't afford private so it looks like I'll have to learn to live with the pain, and hope the cause of it doesn't kill me!

Honestly, the treatment from the NHS for my parents, husband and daughter had been absolutely terrible. Pretty much, go away, come back if needed. Live with the pain. You have to push and push and push.

No idea who to vote for, though.

What are your health problems you are trying to get sorted?
I'm very overweight and age 66
But gosh I've had loads of help.
Injections for my osteoarthritis. Twice a year.. promise of hip replacements when I'm stage 4 ( I'm at stage 3)
I have type 2 diabetes.. been offered mounjaro on NHS ( still deciding)
Urogynocologist for my prolapse.
Had my gallbladder removed last year.
My two GPs are amazing.
Not one of them has ever put anything down to my weight.
They know l used to be slim before l broke both hips and pelvis.
They know my mental health is nothing to do with my weight and I'm having a 24 weeks worth of CAT therapy and it's helping so much.
When I've been blue lighted to hospital ( been a good few times) no one ever mentioned my weight except me.. saying sorry to the paramedics carrying me put onto the trolley.
And they were lovely.
Can you elaborate more?
I'm so sorry it's happening to you. But l weight lot more than you. X

I'm fat, 52, 16 stone.

My GP is going all out to get to the bottom of problems I've had since my late teens. She's not once mentioned my weight, but two other 'specialists' have recently. I pointed out to them that I was 8 stone until ten years ago with the same issue.

I hear you.

God it's shit isn't it.

I am also overweight, with the weight gain caused by taking antipsychotics. So I've got the triple whammy of fat, crazy and female. I could walk in to hospital with a broken neck and I swear they'd put the symptoms down to anxiety and ask if I'd thought about mindfulness and regular exercise. Bellends.

Totally true and totally shit. I've had several negative interactions with medical professions over the years due to my weight. It's the root of all evil apparently, and has been the focus of appointments I've made for tonsillitis, shingles and headaches. I don't have any weight related conditions at all and am generally very healthy but I must be belittled, spoken down to and on one occasion made to cry because my BMI is higher than they would like.

@Moier none of my issues are due to weight. One was diagnosed and treated before I was fat, it's the treatment that's made me fat.

I have an ongoing new issue that is causing problems. I don't want to say what it is as it might be outing however, I can honestly say it can't be remotely linked to my weight.

I've raised this issue multiple times with a GP and each time they have dismissed it or claimed it was something else. No further investigation, just told im wrong and I can't possibly know my own body more than they do. I've been told to exercise more, eat healthy and loose weight and the problems will go away.

I do all these things that they have asked of me. I physically can't loose weight while taking these meds for this other condition (caused by medical negligence).

My voice doesn't matter. I'm am judged and treatment is decided before they have even heard what I have to say.

I’m overweight and suffered with joint problems due to a bone problem. Fobbed off for years. Now I have significant anxiety issues for other reasons suddenly I’m having an operation in a month. The ironic part is now I’m working hard and weight in coming off. I think they need to realise that many are overweight and ignoring us won’t make the problem go away. Good luck x

I'm sorry for all the other posers that feel the same and have been treated poorly 💐

It's infuriating when you're not taken seriously due to misogyny and prejudice.

There are studies that show gender and racial bias in medical treatment, its an issue in many countries not just in the UK. Places like Australia and the US have the same issues. One example is that women are less likely to be prescribed strong pain medication when presenting with the same level of pain as a man. In America there's also a bias in medical treatment against African.Americans and Latin Americans.

Maybe they just don't know what the problem is.
That won't make you feel better. Most people, especially those in the NHS, don't want to be nasty.

TBH the NHS has little interest in treating anyone - they just want you out of their office as quickly and cheaply as possible.

It's bad for everyone. Neither DH or DD can get the treatments they needed. We have to go private. It's impossible to get a GP appointment. YABU to blame it on your sex and weight.

If they don't know what the problem is then why wouldn't they conduct more tests or ongoing investigations? Instead they told me what they think it could be (weight related) and told me to get on with it.

Yep. Endometriosis, you need an op
Oh sorry your BMI is over 40 so we can't do it

Me "sorry? You didn't weigh me?!" My BMI is 34!

Absolutely. Ive just had an appointment through for orthopaedic spinal clinic and it showed where all the clinics wdre in the area. It said next to all the clinics but one: No appointments for people with a BMI over 40. I was appalled. WTF would you do in that situation.....just die?

i'm overweight.. 20st to be precise. My spine is crumbling.

I get a lot of 'lose weight' but i've found the trick is to look the dr in the eye directly, and firmly say "I am not here to discuss my weight, i'd like you to treat me the same as you would if i were a normal weight presenting with this problem. If you refuse to do so, i want you to write it in my notes, with your name to it, that you are refusing to treat me due to prejudice over my being overweight, and your refusal to see past that."

'YABU to blame it on your sex and weight''

They have refused to investigate my issues repeatedly and told me to loose weight, so I do blame it on my weight.

I was previously treated like a hysterical woman, this resulted in a serious medical problem. Still waiting for that apology.

My husband spoke with the same gp via telephone, regarding a small freckle. This wasn't causing him any issues, he just thought it looked a little funny. The red carpet was rolled out and he was referred, seen and treated within a 2 week period. It was indeed a harmless freckle.

Where was that treatment for me when I was repeatedly calling the surgery begging for help due to an undiagnosed chronic condition? Or told all my latest issues are due to my poor weight management and diet?

‘Do you know how many middle aged women moan about being tired and their joints aching?’ Said my male Rheumatologist ‘How were we to know you had a rare disease’

And that misogynistic attitude delayed me getting treatment and becoming very unwell. For the record BMI 21.

So YABU - they hate all women!

I took was always slim until prescribed meds that are known to cause weight gain. It seems like the NHS don't want to acknowledge the huge impact of prescribing on weight

@TheSilenceisDeafening

Why do doctors in this country want to prove you wrong, rather than finding out if what you're telling them is right?

It's not just women though. The NHS, particularly GPs, have become a national fob you off service.

My husband had numerous appointments with various GPs at his surgery over 2 or 3 years with a succession of different ailments. This was after never going near his GP surgery for about 30 years!

Bone ache, fainting, constant nausea, random huge unexplained bruises, broken bone in foot for no reason, joint pain, and a succession of infections and even a broken rib again for no reason.

None of the GPs took any of it seriously.

Until, at one appointment he saw a random locum, who actually listened to him and looked properly at his medical history, and suggested a different kind of blood test (he'd already had the bog standard ones). She phoned a few days later to tell him she'd arranged an emergency appointment with a haematologist! Turned out he had bone marrow cancer and it was so out of control, he was started on chemotherapy the following week!

Now we know what it is, a quick google reveals that all the signs were there - just that a succession of GPs couldn't be bothered to join the dots. Luckily the locum looked at the bigger picture and was spot on with her idea of what it was!

What a ridiculous thing to say. I can honestly say I’ve never met a GP, clinician or nurse that has shown little or no interest in treating me. At my age, I’ve met a fair few!

ftr, i've been complaining of back pain for 26 years, since i was 17.. it took until i was 34 for them to pay attention, and another 3 years for them to FINALLY put me through an MRI scanner.. to discover my spine is crumbling and my disks are desiccated.. and it has fuck all to do with my weight.

So i point that out and don't take their crap any more.

I’m happy for you that you can say this. I can’t.