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Original poster

Husband having open heart surgery tomorrow

123 replies

Myotis · 17/01/2024 19:44

That’s it really- anyone been through something similar? Worried and anxious obviously- he’s second on the list so just hope it goes ahead and is not postponed for any reason. No idea how long he will be in as it is complicated and depends how it goes. Advice and hand holding appreciated x

OP posts:
missnevermind · 18/01/2024 01:00

My DH still sleeps with the bedside lamp on now. He does have terrible dreams and I never considered it but the PTSD thought covers a lot of other things. It took such a long time for his sternum to heal and he is very proud of his scars 😊

Nat6999 · 18/01/2024 01:58

My ex fil had a quadruple bypass just over 20 years ago when I was pregnant with ds. Exh & mil were able to see him in recovery & when he was back on the ward. I went the day after & was surprised how well he looked considering he had major surgery the day before. You need to make sure there is somewhere he can sit & get up without using his arms as this puts strain on the wired sternum. Ex fil was back at cardiac based exercise classes at the hospital within 3 weeks of the op & was able to go away to their caravan for a weekend 10 days after he came out of hospital. He was 64 when he had the op, he had it in June & by the beginning of the new year exh had been diagnosed with MS, fil was fit enough to push exh around in his wheelchair.

MrsNandortheRelentless · 18/01/2024 02:21

Hey OP, how did it go?

One of my parents had cardiac surgery 3 weeks ago. Complex multiple procedures while they had the chest open.
One night and day in intensive care then to the cardiac ward for 5 days.
Home now doing cardiac rehab , walking to the shops, back doing housework etc.
A good experience all in all and quick recovery. Aged 73 so fantastic outcome for an older person after such surgery.
HTH X

Lwrenagain · 18/01/2024 03:57

Just sending some love and hoping he's okay and your anxiety is able to calm a bit now 💐

cudbywestrangers · 18/01/2024 06:15

@Myotis we are in the same boat. I hope you got some sleep. My dh is the only one in his surgeon's list and is due to go down at 8. They've said 1-2 days itu then a few days on hdu then ward then home. Likely 1-2 weeks in hospital. Fortunately we don't live to far from the hospital but juggling his recovery the kids and work is going to be a challenge...

I hope things go smoothly for you dh today. And we can both find a way to deal with the waiting 😬

Original poster
Myotis · 18/01/2024 06:33

cudbywestrangers · 18/01/2024 06:15

@Myotis we are in the same boat. I hope you got some sleep. My dh is the only one in his surgeon's list and is due to go down at 8. They've said 1-2 days itu then a few days on hdu then ward then home. Likely 1-2 weeks in hospital. Fortunately we don't live to far from the hospital but juggling his recovery the kids and work is going to be a challenge...

I hope things go smoothly for you dh today. And we can both find a way to deal with the waiting 😬

sorry to hear you are I the same position, but it’s good to know that some else is there too in a way. Hope it goes well and that you know soon. Yes, I am not looking forward to the juggling- our eldest has mocks again in February and while work have been supportive, he has been ill for so long there is only so much they can do. Will check in with you later- I can’t see mine going in before lunch so it’s the waiting which is just going to feel never ending x

OP posts:
Needapadlockonmyfridge · 18/01/2024 06:40

I hope all goes well today and that your husband has a smooth recovery x

cudbywestrangers · 18/01/2024 06:44

Thank you. Yes, let's check in later.

We've both managed to keep working so far (he probably wasn't really well enough but has a desk job and is stubborn). I've got some annual leave to use but will need to think about what to do after that and how best to eek it out.

I hope the mocks go OK, I find it hard to know how much our kids are bothered by what's going on- it must worry them on some level.

Best get the kids up and get going, hoping to catch dh briefly before he goes down...

whyamiawakestill · 18/01/2024 07:03

Good luck today, my dad have two surgery's, he was overweight, unfit and managed to recover really well from both.

I'd echo the mood, he was quite depressed after both procedures I think it causes trauma, but it sounds like he's had a rough ride last year as well so maybe surgery will be a relief.

Cornishclio · 18/01/2024 08:15

I hope all goes well today. The waiting around for news it is over is difficult so try and keep busy or get a friend over to wait with you. A friend of mine was in the same situation a year after my husbands surgery and I spent the afternoon with her until she got the phone call from the hospital to say it was over.

Original poster
Myotis · 18/01/2024 09:55

@whyamiawakestill
I will keep an eye on his mood so thanks to those who have flagged that- but you are right, he has had a very tough year with 7 months in hospital due to a separate condition, so this feels like at least as long as it goes well, should be a fix for this bit. Hoping that assuming it goes well we can look forwards x

OP posts:
Ihavenoclu · 18/01/2024 12:14

Thinking of you and your dh today @Myotis

Original poster
Myotis · 18/01/2024 14:25

Operation cancelled 😢
So upset, cannot believe we will have to go through this stress all over again

OP posts:
Hedjwitch · 18/01/2024 15:54

I'm sorry it was cancelled. This happened to dh and its a huge psychological blow. Hopefully he'll get on tomorrow's list.

MILTOBE · 18/01/2024 16:09

Oh no. That's such a disappointment.

Original poster
Myotis · 18/01/2024 17:13

Just when you get built up and prepared for it- totally gutted
Not being done tomorrow, probably next week so I have to collect him now- and try and sort the kids out

OP posts:
Hatty65 · 18/01/2024 17:27

Oh how disappointing. Hope things are rescheduled soon.

cudbywestrangers · 18/01/2024 18:24

I'm so sorry to hear this@Myotis we had a cancellation last week and it's so disappointing and frustrating. Plus all the rearranging you have to do in the midst of feeling totally gutted. I hope you get a new date without too much more waiting...

things have gone smoothly here and dh was awake when I popped to the ward before coming home to get the dc. He's drowsy and sore but the team are happy with how things have gone, and I think he's fingers look a bit less blue already. Hoping for a settled night and some tubes out tomorrow...

ManchesterBea · 18/01/2024 18:25

So sorry to hear this for you, after preparing for it. Hope it goes well and goes ahead next week.

Mumdiva99 · 18/01/2024 19:47

Just came to see how he got on. Sorry for the disappointment. Fingers crossed for next week. X

Original poster
Myotis · 18/01/2024 22:16

cudbywestrangers · 18/01/2024 18:24

I'm so sorry to hear this@Myotis we had a cancellation last week and it's so disappointing and frustrating. Plus all the rearranging you have to do in the midst of feeling totally gutted. I hope you get a new date without too much more waiting...

things have gone smoothly here and dh was awake when I popped to the ward before coming home to get the dc. He's drowsy and sore but the team are happy with how things have gone, and I think he's fingers look a bit less blue already. Hoping for a settled night and some tubes out tomorrow...

This is great to hear! So glad it went well, hope he keeps recovering well x

Thanks so much for all your comments, it’s much appreciated. I’ll update once we know what’s going on

Just glad we held of letting the in laws arrive until we knew for sure it had gone ahead otherwise I would have been disappointed and had them to deal with too 🤣

OP posts:
Reallybadidea · 19/01/2024 12:29

Really sorry that it didn't go ahead. It might be worth asking for him to be first on the list when it is rescheduled. Hopefully this would happen anyway, but it is worth explaining the impact it's having on the whole family. IME this is taken into account when scheduling the list order. I'm in a different centre but we're really struggling to get any second cases done at the moment, particularly towards the end of the week.

Original poster
Myotis · 19/01/2024 14:33

He has been rescheduled for Monday- will know on Sunday if he is first on the list. I really hope so as that was my concern on Thursday too. Fingers tightly crossed.

OP posts:
cudbywestrangers · 19/01/2024 16:22

@Myotis glad you have a new date and it's not too much longer to wait. And good thinking holding off the arrival of the inlaws!

Things going quite well here. Stepped down to HDU today and has been sat out of bed for a couple of hours this afternoon. He's very tired and very sore and its clearly a major op to recover from. But the surgeon is happy and hopefully things will get better day by day.

Will be thinking of you as you prepare for monday

FlamingoFloss · 19/01/2024 16:26

Really sorry to hear it was cancelled. Fingers crossed you hear on Sunday. Our granddaughter had to have open heart surgery at one week old. We knew before birth this would be the case . It’s a scary time but….try and have faith. I am in absolute awe of the surgeons who operated on what was a heart the size of a grape, as well as all the other doctors and nurses who cared for her. If it can be done, it will be done. Hang in there xx