I'm terrified of surgery

[BubblesGalore81]

I have been offered surgery that will give me a much better quality of life and I really want to go ahead with it but I am terrified. It is quite major surgery back/chest, will take around 6 hours if no complications and around 4/6 months to recover hospital stay expect of around 7 days. I would have to have 6 months off work, this would be on full pay so not worried about that.

I am in my 40's and never had any kind of surgery before, only been in hospital when I had dc and I didn't stay over night then. I'm scared of being put to sleep and not being in control, what if I don't wake up, what if complications happen? But then it will have a massive impact on my quality of life on a condition that is getting worse. I have appointment after Christmas with the surgeon where I will have to make a decision.

Ex-nurse here. I can't comment on the specific surgery, as I have neither the information nor the knowledge. What I can say, though, is that being under an anaesthetic is a very safe place to be - you have at least one highly-skilled medical professional watching you at every second; that part is definitely not an area to have any fears over.

Again hard to say without knowing the type of surgery about risk of complications etc. I am an anaesthetist and as previous poster has said we stay with you the whole time with continuous monitoring of your condition too. The two things that people are generally worrying about when I see them are waking up before surgery is finished and not waking up once surgery is complete. Both of these are very unlikely. Have a look at the Royal College of Anaesthetists website search there for “information for patients risk infographic” a great summary of the risks most of which are minor.
Hopefully you can be reassured and you will of course meet your anaesthetist on the day of surgery feel free to tell them your concerns.

I have just had my first ever operation. I was beyond worried about all of the things - it was a spinal with sedation so worried about it hurting going in, not working, not being sedated enough so I would see/hear/smell everything, being too sedated and not waking up etc. I articulated very little of it because my rational head told me I was being dramatic but my subconscious head had me physically shaking in the anaesthetic room. My anaesthetist could not have been more amazing. He was so calm and professional and conversational and reassuring without being patronising, and basically told me that he would look after me and he did. He was just brilliant. We had a really good debrief after which was helpful as well. Anaesthetists are my new medical heroes.

Up until a couple of years ago, I was in the 'terrified of GA' camp. To the extent that when I broke my hand I talked them into letting me have a nerve block and staying awake while they screwed my hand back together.

Then I got a seriously infected gallbladder due to gallstones and GA was the only option.

It was fabulous!

Seriously loved it, they told me to count it before I'd even got to 3 I was out. A second later I woke up, no feeling of any time having passed at all, just like I'd had the most restful sleep of my life.

I can't comment on your recovery because I don't know anything about your surgery, but what I've always found about recovery is that while it may be painful, it's a different pain to the one you had before. There is an end in sight, it gets gradually better day by day and it feels like a productive useful pain, rather than never ending and hopeless like it can feel when you are damaged and have no action plan in place to be fixed.

I've had a GA a couple of times and the most fabulous anaesthetists both times. The first one realised I was petrified (had young children and was terrified I'd die and they'd be motherless!) He came to have a chat with me, let me air my (irrational) fears, then reassured me with a big smile and twinkling eyes that there was no way he'd let me die in surgery because 'the paperwork is a nightmare!' That made me laugh out loud and I'm here to tell the story!

Discuss the potential complications with your surgeon so you are fully informed when you make your decision. Write a list of questions and take them with you, make notes about the answers. They wouldn't advise surgery if you didn't need it and it could be that if you don't have it now it won't be possible later so take that into consideration too.

Thank you very much for the reassuring replies. It's spinal surgery but going through the side and removing a rib. I've joined a support group and lots of people on there have had surgery with this surgeon and can't recommend and praise him enough. I'm just worried about the being put to sleep

Please have a look at the infographic I mentioned upthread - sorry I don’t know how to do links!

https://www.rcoa.ac.uk/sites/default/files/documents/2021-12/Risk-infographics_2019web.pdf

Hope this works for you

I understand why you might feel fearful. But please also remember your age. There are people in their 90s having anaesthetics all the time. You are a young woman and any risks are vanishingly small.

I used to feel like this.

Ive had surgery 3 times now.

Its honestly worth it just for that amazing feeling of going under. ‘Count back from 10’ I’m always determined to get to 6 but never do.

Oh, this was me a few months ago. I had to have major gynae surgery. Not as major as yours, but open surgery that required me to be in hospital for a few days after, and 8 weeks off work.

I was PETRIFIED. Like absolutely beyond scared. And I can say now that the fear was 100% the worst part of the whole thing.

You will wake up. You just will. The chances of not waking up are ridiculously small, almost non existent for elective surgery. You're surrounded by doctors and nurses at all times, they're constantly monitoring you.

All I remember is walking down to the theatre, laying down on the bed. They put the needle in my hand and said "this might make your arm ache" and I said "oh yeah it does"....

Next thing I know I'm in the recovery area. I had a morphine pump for pain relief and they were telling me to press it. It worked like a charm.

You'll be okay. Its really, really not as scary as it seems. I nearly passed out walking down to the theatre because I was so scared, the nurse had to hold me up. I wish I hadn't wasted so much worry over it all.