OCD

[Nosleepclub13]

Not entirely sure what I'm after to be honest, maybe just a rant.

I've "officially" had OCD for about 4/5 years now, but it goes way further back. OCD for me is constantly overanalyzing every single situation, constant intrusive thoughts, everything in my mind is always "worst case scenario". I'm also a checker so I constantly check things are off or locked and to be honest it's exhausting.

I've been prescribed various medications, currently mirtazipine (hopefully spelled correctly) which helps to some extent however if this is as good as it's ever going to be I can't imaging living my life like this. I'm in my 30s and have two children, one in primary school and the other is 18 months. I will need to return to work soon as financially we can't afford for me to be off any longer, and I would love to return to work however I don't know how I will cope with the constant OCD 😭

Has anyone else been in this position? What helped? Does it ever get better? I'm currently having come counselling through the NHS which is great but it'll be coming to an end soon and I feel no better than when I started. We can't really afford any private therapy and I'm worried when it ends I'm on my own with it again.

Sorry for the rant and thank you if you made it to the end!

Mine did improve massively, and I was pretty much fine for a number of years, so have hope!
Unfortunately the pandemic caused it to flare up again and I was worse than ever, it has improved again slightly but I feel I will just be living like this now tbh. My recent NHS counselling consisted of 4 telephone calls and her telling me to try to desensitise myself by holding something for 5 seconds before rushing to wash my hands 🙄
I take Lofepramine and propranolol.

How did you manage to get yours to improve? I feel like mine has just got worse over time and although the medication helps ease it ever so slightly, just one thing happens and I'm rock bottom again 😭

Do you find that combination of medication helpful? I want to feel better than I do now without feeling completely numb.

First time around it was a combination of a change from previous medication to Lofepramine, along with life suddenly becoming less stressful due to a change in circumstance.
This time, being as it was triggered by the pandemic, the easing of that has lessened it I suppose. The Propranolol stops the panicked feelings so I suppose it’s stops me feeling so driven to do the things I feel the need to do.
Maybe a dose increase or a change in medication would help? Do speak to the dr again if things aren’t improving.