Do I get DS circumsised?

[Kneehighinnappies]

My dh is off this weekend to see dss2 who is having the chop at the age of 17,(owwww) acording to my dh he should have had it done years ago but x wife was against it.
Anyway now that dss2 is older and sexually active he finds he needs the op.
Dh has now suggest that we get Ds done while he is a baby, just incase he has the same problem as dss2 is not the only one in dh's family who has had to have the op.
Do we get him done just incase or leave it and wait and see?

get proper medical advice from your GP .. tell GP about family history.

You won't get a sensible answer to a circumcision question on this board. It is one of the hotspots I'm afraid.

But is there anyway to tell weather he needs it done at a early age?

Agree if he needs it now, have it done now

If it so happens he needs it later, get it done later.

I wouldn't do it unless medically recommended.

(also suspect Twig is right and you should go on medical advice and not advice you get on here)

You just don't know whether your ds's willy is the same as his step-brother's. Would be OTT IMO to have your ds circumcised just in case. Also, from your profile it seems he's 11 months old. I would have thought that he would need a general anaesthetic for the operation and that's something to be avoided unnecessarily at a young age in my opinion.

Tbh, I know I should go to the dr and get it checked out, but I would like to hear the reasons why it is not a good Idea as dh is really set on having it done, and I don't know how I feel on the subject yet.
You make a very good point pooka.

at 11 months it would be under GA .. which I wouldn't do willingly

but on the flip side more quickly forgotten than an older child / teen

Am having DS done when he is 4 after DH having awful trouble with his and I am not just talking infections - it is your choice but you won't get a balanced view on here!

The GA and the whole operation idea does freak me out,I can't even hold them when they have their jabs, so I don't know how I would cope with that.

Twinkle1 do you know how long it takes them to heal after the op, by that I mean how long till it is comfertable for them?

We went to our GP for advice when DS was born...

The advice was basically have it done for religious reasons but there is no real medical reason why a child needs to be done...

There are those boys/men who are and aren't in our family and all seem to happy with their decisions... however, my brother needed to have it done when he was older..

There are also stories I heard about a boy who had it done and then had to have it re-done???

I think you will get a balanced view in that some people will post who are very anti, some will post who are already in the position of a circumcision being medically required, and some will post from a position of being in favour of circumcisions in general.

TBH of all posters who are in general wary of circumcision, I would have thought that most, me included, would have their ds circumcised if it was medically necessary.

DH had some problems when he was a teen with a tight foreskin, though with him it did improve over time (but made things painful for him initially). I know that ds might have similar, though equally he might not. I will wait and see how things pan out, but would want to avoid unnecessary surgery.

LOL at pooka saying that with a straight face

balanced view on circumcision on mumsnet

oh rofl

Glad I made you laugh - but what I meant was that you are quite right. Is a hot topic and one that if you are anti unless absolutely medically necessary (and I have doubts about ds in the future ref. dh as a late teen, but we'll see) you're never going to agree with it being done as a precautionary measure. There's no grey area really.

See your GP and ask for a referral to a specialist.

The advice on MN on circumcision is highly emotionally charged.

I went to ask gp about ds when he was born and was told flat out no!
My DH had to have his done as an adult (he was in hospital for 4 days)????
Also my brother in law and nephew.
All for the same reason that foreskin tightened and got infected and torn.
GP was not at all interested in having it done as a precaution, but apparently you can pay to have it done privately if you feel that you want it.

agree with pooka, you will get plenty of sensible and balanced opinions here, but in a situation like this, there is no right answer.

We are not talking of ritual circumcision, or "cosmetic" circumcision, both of which invite a LOT of comments, both for and against.

The question here is whether your baby needs a circumcision for medical reasons. Plenty of MNers are doctors, BUT none have seen your ds's willy so couldn't give a reasoned opinion.

FWIW, I think that unless your ds has a problem NOW, he doesn't need a circumcision now. A GA with its risks and an op with its risks "just in case" is not good medicine. Your gp, or failing that, a paediatric surgeon should be able to advise you of the chances of your ds needing it done.

Our gp mentioned it the other day when ds was suffering from balanitis for the second time. I practically froze.

No way, unless I have explored every alternative. He is four btw.

She said that a sore willy is often caused by bubble bath etc. so if we avoid that he should be Ok - also to watch for any 'ballooning' or dribbling, basically if the flow is good and constant he is Ok, but any stoppage needs looking at.

I thought I had finally cracked it, he was having baths and enjoying them!

When my ds was born his foreskin had not formed properly. I was quite happy to leave it the way it was but dh said he didnt want him to be ridiculed when he got older. Anyhow he started to have a lot of infections so had to have surgery to correct it. He has had no further probs and although the surgery was scary more for us than him at least he wont remember it. It only took him a few days to get over it he just cried everytime he had a wee but he is absolutely fine now

my ds had his circumcision at 7 weeks under local anesthetic.he didn't even cry!came home with a cleaning treatment and anesthetic cream and was told to water it down and after taking bandage off to apply cream. he was healed by the 3rd day and completely recovered after a week. i would definately do it early again if i have a boy, but make sure the doctor is reputable, mine was recommendation by everyone around me so that helped.

pfffffff! typed a long post and now gone!

Our DS was circumcised as a baby by religious tradition.

I don't see the rationale of doing it "just in case" referring to medical hypotheticals.
I'm even more at DSS 17 years old ( is he willing?) "having the chop" because he is now sexually active!!!!

I'm not saying religious motive good others bad. Just that we knew AND AGREED from the outset that we'd do it. We have witnessed it first hand with many jewish and muslim friends and family. It's perfectly fine when done on small babies by skilled practitioner. Heals well as kutilputil described.

I would suggest a serious discussion with DP about his motives. Maybe he needs to be reminded that the decision is not his alone and that he's got to have valid reasons. I also think that when a toddler can walk and talk ( actually as soon as they move about and communicate even non verbally and that is very early - a few months) they should be asked.

Our Ds had it at 15 months. Way too old. We delayed it because various family dramas came in the way ( car crash - coma - trauma of hospitals).

Anyway, DS now 4 remembers.

Here's the story to meditate:

I'm pg and we all went for a scan to meet baby. When in hospital, he saw the white coats and kept quiet. Later that day he complained of nappy rash.
I said don't be silly you don't have one. He replied yes but remember yesterday when we went to hospital and I had a nappy rash and you put cream on my willy to make it better?
I said you were a baby how can you remember? he said very matter of factly :I was not a baby-baby, I was a talking baby!

That was a complete shock! we did a lot of cuddling and explaining afterwards and never talked about it since.

Golly how bizarre slim. Saying that, dd 'remembers' when she fell over when out with her granny and her tights broke and she had to lie on the sofa. She was 16 months at the time and she is now 4.5. She has got a scar though, and I sometimes wonder whether the scar acts as a visual clue or reminder.

Anyway - I digress.