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Original poster

How do you know your having a breakdown?

46 replies

Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:05

At the moment I feel sort of distanced from everything. Noises are too loud, if theres more than the telly on and someone talking I could happily scream "Shut Up" till the noise shuts up.
Im swearing like a trooper. Things To Do are building up and to think about what needs to be done is too much to bear but im slowly working through the pile about 7 days behind...
Im still funtioning, but only because I have to...is this a breakdown?
Or is it because its nearly Xmas and theres too much on my plate?

OP posts:
spacedonkey · 14/12/2004 12:07

I suppose it depends how you define a breakdown ... from what you've said, it sounds like you're still managing but feel as if you're on the brink of letting it all go to pot?

DingWongMerrilyOnHigh · 14/12/2004 12:09

get your thyroid levels checked.

SantaFio2 · 14/12/2004 12:11

i beleive my mum 'nearly' had a breakdown several years ago and for it was because she acted totally out of charachter. She just wasnt herself at all and went completely off the rails. Luckily she agreed to let the dr come and see her and she was reffered for emergency counsellking and took prozac for a short while. She cant even remember half the stuff she did whilst she was going through this period and certainly cant remember putting the fear of god into the royal mail delivery bloke () If you feel you are on the edge, please go and see your GP xx

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas · 14/12/2004 12:12

You sound like me Festivepussy and I may well be on the verge of a breakdown. I do think though that you have to start behaving irrationally first, and your behaviour sounds more extreme than irrational.

amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:13

Oh poor you Festivepussy. Sending you big hugs{{{{}}}. If you are managing to get through the backlog - however slowly- I think you are probably doing ok. Sounds like you definately need some time out to relax though. Are there things on you "to do" list that could wait? I get like this sometimes. It really gets to feel like I cant cope and I know exactly what you mean about noise - sometimes I feel like my head is going to explode! I find that by sitting down and prioritising what needs to be done and then planning it out in managable chunks over the week that it feels less daunting. It also means that when I have done the each day's tasks I can pat myself on the back and take some time out to relax.

amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:15

I agree with santafio - go see your gp if you really feel like you cant cope.

slim22 · 14/12/2004 12:15

Hi,
Sounds like you are pretty close, but if you ask other mums(I'm one of them) we all have these moments, for many, it's well..... most days!
Try and get some fresh air/exercise every day(a brisk walk will do) and if you have someone who can take charge for a few hours, take some "me time" and do yoga or any pampering stuff (no just a one off, but on a regular basis, say once a week)
Reassess after a few weeks/post christams holiday trauma.
If you need to talk more, we're here!
Take care.

Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:17

I am not thinking about the To Do list, I have wrapped some parcels to be posted and done some washing...that will do for now, anything extra will be a bonus.
What is behaving irrationally? I walked out the other night not wanting to come back

OP posts:
amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:19

What made you came back?

spacedonkey · 14/12/2004 12:20

I wouldn't say walking out is behaving irrationally, I'd say it's a rational reaction to feeling too much stress. How long have you felt like this?

Petesmum · 14/12/2004 12:23

Sounds like you've suffering from stress because you've got too much on your plate. However having recently witnessed my step-mum having a nervous breakdown, you don't sounds anything like as irrational / stranged / stressed as she did. If that's any help at all!

You post this morning sounded very positive - knowing & accepting your limits is really good. Just as long as you don't then spend the rest of the day worrying about all the other things on the to do list!

Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:24

Because I wasnt sure if dp would leave the kids with the neighbours the next day to go to work, the little one had a party to go to...the big one had school and i had work and i needed a bath..
I came home and said I am losing it, you need to help me with this shit...and he has..so thats good.
About 2-3 weeks. im used to having days or it...this doesnt seem to have lifted...and where i would usually be very PMT like this month there was barely a difference. PMT permanently.

OP posts:
Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:25

Petesmum thats what I thought, I thought when you lost it you just did...I think im standing on the edge here...trying to keep on the cliff.

OP posts:
spacedonkey · 14/12/2004 12:30

It could be christmas-related FP? Make sure you get as much help as you can, take some time out for yourself as much as possible, and see how you feel after christmas. A visit to the GP might be a good idea as well X

amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:31

Those all sound like rational reasons to come back and 2-3 weeks is not really that long although I appreciate for you it feels like a long time to be feeling so stressed. You must take some time out to do someting just for you - even if its just 1/2 in the bath with no interuptions. Look after yourself - things will not fall apart if the house isnt tidy or there are jobs waiting to be done. Xmas is always stressful because we want it to be good but when you think about it we put are selves through so much stress and then its over in a couple of days.

Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:32

Will Do SpaceDonkey. Thanks x

OP posts:
ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas · 14/12/2004 12:33

Festivepussy - are your children new to school etc? I find the round of parties, nativities, concerts, Christmas card writing (for me and getting the children to do theirs) buying presents, wrapping presents, doing decorations, etc ,etc got much worse when my children started school and playgroup. It is still bad now. You are bound to feel pressurised and as though you are sinking. Just keep your head above the water for now and then see how you go after Christmas. I really feel for you as I am going through it myself at the moment. Now is not a good time to be sure of what is just the build-up to Christmas and what is you having a breakdown IYSWIM.

amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:33

Sorry meant 1/2 hour in the bath and not 1/2 a bath

spacedonkey · 14/12/2004 12:33

Yes, I would say go through your To Do list and lower your expectations of yourself - delegate anything you can and just cross some out. e.g. I haven't sent christmas cards for about 3 years now and haven't lost any friends over it!

Gobbledigoose · 14/12/2004 12:44

FP - it sounds like it's all just getting you down and tbh, you sound like me at the moment.

I'm really struggling and I know it's because I've just got too much on. Got the 3 kids (all under 4) all day then have to work at night and weekend (work freelance and while dh is saying 'just turn work down' I don't feel I can because we are moving house and need the money and don't know when a 'quiet' spell will come) and on top of that, I've done all the Xmas shopping myself, still stuff to get, wrap etc and we are doing Xmas lunch so there's that to sort out....then we move house on 5th Jan. Add to that all the usual stuff like housework, paperwork, washing and I'm running on empty with practically no time to get my head round anything.

Yesterday I could quite happily have walked out. I considered ringing dh to say if he wasn't home in 10 mins I was leaving the kids in the house. I know I've not completely lost it because I know I wouldn't do that in a million years, but I am definitely getting down about the level of stress I'm under at the moment and I'm worrying about ds2 (2yrs) whose behaviour is really challenging at the moment.

Sorry, I've hijacked your thread a bit and it's upsetting me now but I feel better for getting it off my chest.

I think there will be a fair few us at the moment whose plates are just overflowing and we are buckling under the weight. It sounds like you are coping with it by working through your 'to do' list but if you can tonight, get a nice glass of wine, run a bubble bath and just chill out.

Wish I could take me own advice but I've got work, work and more work

Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:44

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas Its hard to pinpoint it yes, and to pinpoint why everything is suddenly so irritating and difficult.
My dds are 4 and 7 and we spent one night doing thier cards which was nice except i wasnt quite there with them, its like im there in body but mind is...fuzzy and elsewhere but i dont know where...and im aware of it but i cant do anything about it???

OP posts:
Gobbledigoose · 14/12/2004 12:46

I really think it's everything we have to do for Xmas that is exacerbating the problem so I'm sure it will get better come January!

Like SD idea of doing no cards. I'm only up to B in my address book and I just can't face any more. Will everyone think I'm really humbug!?

Original poster
Festivepussy · 14/12/2004 12:46

Feel free to hijack, its nice to know its not just me...the funnything is inbetwwen posts here in running up and down sorting stuff out where once upon a time i would have just sat here and let the stuff fester but now im manically trying to keep on top...

OP posts:
spacedonkey · 14/12/2004 12:47

GdG, like I say I haven't lost any friends over it, and it's a blessed relief not to have to think about it tbh

amynSaintnixmum · 14/12/2004 12:48

You really arent the only one Festivepussy. I often go "fuzzy" when i am really stressed. I think its just that I feel like I cant take any more brain stimulation - even if its good stuff - I just feel too wrung out and drained.

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