Always in pain and always tired

[ShatteredMum23]

Im just after a bit of advise / a moan really.

Im 36, nearly 37. Mum of 2, work part time but do long hours with a longish work commute on foot.

Im always tired and everything always hurts. Lots of headaches, painful joints, laying down, sitting up hurts, even walking now. Minor issues such as catching the base of a nail on a table top or lightly bumping into a door frame seem to cause lasting pain. Muscular pain, restless legs and night cramps are a common theme too. I’m so used to paracetamol and ibuprofen that they are not worth taking now as they don’t work. My husband is fed up of me “being constantly ill” (his words) and now doesn’t believe me if I say I feel unwell.

No matter how much sleep I get, or what my diet is like, how much water or exercise I get, nothing makes a difference, I’m still exhausted and in pain.

My weight is increasing, my periods are all over the place, im constantly feeling nauseous and have an upset stomach. My mental health is at an all time low, I’m so tearful all the time, I feel worthless and not good enough. Whilst I’m not suicidal I can sympathise with those who do it and can see how things can get too much. I have brain fog and can’t retain information very long. Putting on a brave face is getting harder and harder.

I feel like I’m letting my family down as I’m not good enough. Feel like I’m letting my work down as my confidence is at an all time low. No one has said anything about my performance at work but I’m just paranoid everyone is better than me and they are only keeping me on as it’s incredibly hard to recruit to my role.

We’ve just come back from a 2 week all inclusive holiday where I’ve not had to lift a finger and had plenty of rest and if anything I’m worse than before.

I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I just feel awful. Can anyone advise me what to do? My GP surgery is awful, 6-8 week wait for an appointment.

I could have written your post, I'm so sorry that you are struggling.
Have you always felt so ill or is it recently?
I can tell you that you are not letting anyone down, you are doing your best, and that is all you can do.
I would go ahead and book an appointment with the GP, or you could ask if it's possible to get an appointment anywhere else sooner for example an out of hours GP that's what ours do. Alternatively speak to 111 and ask their suggestions.
Feeling ill is horrible and I hope you soon get to the bottom of it.

@4catsaremylife it's been a while to be honest, just getting progressively worse. I'm just so fed up.

I'm sorry you are feeling bad too. It's awful when ill health affects your day to day life

Textbook early menopause??

A lot of what yiu are describing I experience. I have fibromyalgia =-widespread body pain. It so unpredictable. Is this something you have heard about/ considered perhaps? Hope u get sim9e answers. Start keeping a diary re activities/ effect on your body so u have something concrete to tell GP. Good luck OP

Possibly. My mum was young too (before 40) so could be. Worth a suggestion to my GP I guess

As a PP suggested GP first...could be thyroid based or something else immune system based. Blood tests should find or rule out the most common which hopefully will help if the GP doesn't have a eureka moment after having spoken with you

Yes, it's so unpredictable. It doesn't even depend on activity levels either.

Some days are better than others pain wise but not a day goes by where I don't have some kind of pain. Today it's my hips, pelvis, lower back and upper thighs but I think that's due to the long haul travel the last 24 hours. A day or two ago it was my knees and ankles. Heat is helping a little now as is being back in my own bed. But I'm in pain and it does affect my sleep. I'm either struggling to get to sleep, or struggling to stay asleep. Average about 5 hours a night usually which isn't great.

I've not even considered fibromyalgia, but I probably should have, I know others with it. I'm going to have a read and see what it comes back with.

Trouble is, I don't know if the mental health is due to the pain or just general lift or a combo of both. But I need to address that too.

I'm so done with this pain. I've got to work today, an 11 hour shift and everything hurts. I cannot wait for the weekend when I can just sleep, rest and do nothing. Though, why I am I don't know, 2 weeks of doing nothing didn't help on holiday. Another night of not much sleep hasn't helped my bad mood either

Op did you ever speak to your GP and have any tests done or come to any conclusions?

Yes, I did in the end. It took a while and backwards and forwards with blood tests. I have anaemia and also depression and anxiety. I've been on medication for the anaemia and the depression and anxiety for a while and also the mini pill which should hopefully mean no more periods which will in turn will prevent anaemia coming back.

Im still not totally better but much better than I was but it's a work in progress.

That's great news that they worked out a contributing factor or two and you are able to treat them. I'm glad you're improving, sounds like a step in the right direction x

Poor gut health is the norm these days, and can cause a mixed bag of symptoms. It can also cause food sensitivities, especially gluten or dairy, which make symptoms worse - tiredness, brain fog, pain, twitching, feet burning etc.

definitely get yourself check out by the doctor, but it might be worth cutting out dairy and gluten for two weeks - there’s no test for sensitivity. If that’s an issue you will feel like a new person within a fortnight. If not, at least it’s something you have ruled out.

also, it’s a good idea to take probiotics and eat plenty of fiber to boost your good gut bacteria. It might not be the silver bullet for you, but for me this has been life changing. I was diagnosed with fibro and cfs, and suffered for years before cutting out gluten and I’m now trying to fix my gut health.