Should i tell family about Breast clinic appointment

[Sallybudge]

I’ve got an appointment at the breast clinic Friday the 3rd feb for a sore lumpy boob. I’ve not told my children( 25 and 26) or my parents.
My breast is sore Doctor says it’s lumpy but says don’t worry but they would wouldn’t they. My question is do I tell my children or do I wait tell them when I have the results . If I need a biopsy do I wait till I get the results of that or do I tell them I’m awaiting results . I’d want to know if it was them but I don’t want to worry them
My husband and I trying to help my parents at the moment as my dad is having health issues himself and everyone’s worried about him can I add this . If I get the all clear Friday great if I don’t do I keep quiet anyone been in this position.
thanks for reading my essay

I’ve been loads of times and never tell anyone. What’s the point unless there’s anything to tell. You will just worry them hopefully unnecessarily

Hi @Sallybudge . Was in your exact situation-my DC were early 20's.

I didn't tell anyone. What is the point of worrying them when you actually don't know anything.
I found it easier to just get on with things and tell them when I knew. Easier for me not to have to deal with their worries and queries as well tbh.

Good luck

I don’t think there’s a right answer to this but maybe go for the biopsy then decide. Do you have someone else who could support you at this stage? Hope you’re ok!

Dd went over Christmas. We decided not to tell anyone and spoil their Christmas. Everything was fine.

I don't tell anyone anything like that unless there's a reason to from any results

No point adding stress needlessly to other people lives

Or if you like the drama and attention of it all which I definitely do not

I found a lump during lockdown and only told my hubby and best friend. Kept it from my 18, 20 and 22 year old. My case was very clear and they could tell from mamogram/ultrasound it was cancer. I didnt tell my kids until i got the results of the biopsy back 2 weeks later and i knew what kind it was and how it would be treated. That way I could answer all questions which made it much less scary for them.

Is the question you're really asking OP 'I'm scared and I want all the love and support I can get right now' ?

I would still hold off till you get any results and keep it between you and DH for now

Yeh you’ve all said what I was thinking why worry them. It’s not as if anyone can do anything and all anyone can say is don’t worry .It just felt a bit dishonest seeing them and not saying anything so wanted to see other people thought I was doing the right thing.
A lot of people in a worse position than me so don’t want to moan about it thanks everyone .

Redannie118 Can I ask did they tell you straight away on your first appointment. I’ve had a mammogram in the last 6 months and got the all clear from that Not sure if they’ll do another on Friday

I think in truth I’m finding it hard holding it together as well as supporting parents but don’t want to dump it all on the kids so I’m dumping it here instead where know one knows me 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I didn’t tell my dh until I’d been to clinic and had a biopsy but I had to have a mammogram yearly as both my days and drum had had it.Once I had to have biopsy I only send as u was 99% sure it would be breast cancer.my dm had a few weeks less if not worrying in the end.good luck xx

No idea why days and drum is there! Should say DSis and Dmum

Thanks everyone should have said hope everyone’s ok now .

If it's a one stop clinic, they will be able to give you a very good idea on the day. I'm a frequent flier at our local clinic and the vast majority of women get a response on the day.

In the event that they need more tests, they will still give you a good idea of what their thinking is.

The wait for the appointment is awful and I can sympathise with teh worry you are going through. What I will say is the GP wouldn't have told you not to worry if they thought there was something you needed to worry about. It's not just a platitude from them when they say it.

@Sallybudge as @ThreeB said yes, they did tell me same day( i was actually told while having ultrasound). I had heard that would be the case beforehand, so i was prepared.

I 'd keep quiet. My husband had heart issues & an op many years ago, and never told his elderly mother. So, as it happened, she died a few years later and was none the wiser - which totally justified the decision, as she didn't worry about him in her final years.
Plus, there's nothing to actually tell them yet anyway - just a clinic appointment. There is a lot to be said for keeping medical issues private.

Sorry - posted on wrong thread. Have reported myself.

It's such a personal decision, but when I was in this situation last year I didn't tell anyone until after I'd had a verdict and knew what the next steps would be. I knew my DDs and DS would be worried but at least by the time I told them they knew exactly the extent of the problem and I was able to answer their questions. They all said I should have shared earlier, so they could support me, but I needed to be clear in my head first.

I’ve had my appointment today and luckily I got the all clear. I’d like to tell people not to worry but I know it’s human nature everyone there look really nervous three people before me all came out looking very relieved. I still have a sore bust and no real explanation as to why but the consultant is sure it’s nothing sinister. Don’t panic if you have to have a mammogram it’s just a precaution in a lot of cases. I feel a bit of fool now .Hopefully everyone else waiting will get good news as well.

So pleased you got good news!