Feeling really scared

[marykateashley]

Have rejoined under a different name, I'm a regular lurker usually. I'm hoping for someone to give me some words of wisdom to just help calm my racing brain.

I'm going to give all details so any help is fully informed.

3 weeks ago I woke up with a sore boob, lump appeared. Within 3 days I was in so much pain that any pressure on it caused vomiting. So off I go to doctors on a Friday morning. No redness, no temperature or anything. Dimple has by now appeared at one end of the lump. Diagnosed as deep seated abscess and given flucloxacillin for a week. By Tuesday whole half of boob is hard, still crazy painful. So Wednesday morning, back I go. Doctor sends me straight to local hospital boob surgeon. They had a poke around and did US scan. No liquid in there, not abscess. So given another 7 days of flucloxacillin and appointment for 7 days later.

I went back this Wednesday and the pain is greatly reduced, swelling also not as bad but still huge lump in there that is tender. Strange marble size lump on one end of the lump. Dr has a poke, says oh that's strange I need the consultant. Consultant comes in and has a poke and says oh yes very strange. Do core needle biopsies.
So I have had biopsies done, given some coamoxiclav for 7 days just in case a different antibiotic will help, and told I'll get a phone call on Tuesday with the results.

So here we are, I'm terrified. The kids went off to their dads last night and I completely fell apart, I don't have a solid support system and hate to ask for help over trivial things. I've said to all friends that I'm not thinking one way or the other because what's the point until I know the results but my god Tuesday is so far away!!!!
Is there anyone who had similar and can reassure me that it's probably going to be nothing? Also, is there anyone who had the bad news from biopsies who may be able to tell me what I need to expect next? I hate not knowing things and I'd really like to know what process is followed with each option.

If you've made it this far, well done and thank you

Hi OP,

I completely understand your worry. I'm currently waiting for a consultant appointment on Tuesday to make a decision on whether to monitor or remove what looks to be a benign brain tumour. My whole earth went from under me when I heard the words last week after the initial CT scan but thankfully after the MRI etc it looks to be a growth that could have been there possibly my whole life or slow growing and not sinister but the last week has been the longest of my life and I keep second guessing the doctors who I've dealt with so far. What I'm trying to say clumsily is you are not alone. I truly hope the best for you.

It is scary, I was in same situation a few years ago, waiting for the results of biopsy is horrible. I had an appointment at the breast clinic one week after biopsy, but that morning the consultant rang to tell me that it was a fatty lump and nothing needed to be done further. I hope it’s good news for you.

I'm sorry you're both facing these issues.

When I was waiting for breast test results I read an interview with someone who was diagnosed with breast cancer - her words were 'you can be as scared as you like but you must gather your strength and take a run at the problem'. That sustained me. Best of luck to you both.

Another Mnsnetter Bacdoc ( as doctor herself) once advised not to meet trouble half way when waiting for results.

Sorry that was meant to be Babdoc

Thank you. I've obviously been on Google and I'm 37 and with everything else I tick all the boxes for inflammatory breast cancer so that's in my head now. I had an awful bruise and small lump on the other boob 3 years ago but was told immediately when they scanned it that was nothing to be worried about and it went away. There wasn't this level of pain, or this massive dimple, or the lump the size of a tennis ball. The doctor the other day said 'well its not in the lymph nodes yet' while talking to himself through the examination so I guess at least there's that.

Hi OP, there are a wealth of ladies on the cancer support thread who know so much about BC, signs and symptoms. We are more than happy to support people in the waiting period and happy to offer comfort on diagnosis or send them on their way with joy when they turn out not to be on the cancer journey. Please feel free to post in there. I have no other advice, but I know the wait is the very worst time, try and remember that no amount of worry will change the outcome of Tuesday. Whatever it is it already is so try not to allow it too much thought until you need to.

If it's any help, I worked two weeks in the breast clinic, usually straightaway the doctor knew by looking at the ultrasound that it was cancer, I never saw them uncertain about something and they would always relay their concerns during the ultrasound.

Hi OP

Im on the cancer chat thread as also waiting for results. Am afraid I don’t know anything specific about breast cancer ( I’m waiting on review of MRI for fibroid that may be uterine sarcoma - which has very poor prognosis) but I am also a single parent without much real life support ( no family near by and friends have their own kids etc). My DC only to their dads for sat afternoon but I have also broken down as soon as they left!

My results were meant to be next Tuesday but delayed a week now.

Anyway I just wanted to say I understand the fear, and how hard it is going through it as a single parent without much support. Putting on a normal face for the kids and trying not to let the panic take over. And the fear for the DC.

Sending you strength virtually.

The waiting for results is the worst bit, once you know you can focus on and deal with whatever it is. I had breast cancer last year and can reassure you that if you do get the worst news you will be treated swiftly and efficiently with great care from everyone you meet along the way. I cannot praise the NHS enough for the treatment I received. Please remember though that 3 out of 4 women who attend the breast clinic are not diagnosed with breast cancer. Good luck for Tuesday, I hope you get good news.

@museya15 that would help massively except the scan was done on one end of a lot of swelling and the consultant and doctor both said that result (that just said normal) was very obviously wrong because the small lump at the other end very obviously felt abnormal. They both said it several times on Wednesday. But didn't consider scanning again. Just said biopsies and that's that. Seemed daft to me, I'd have scanned it again, but what do I know 🤷‍♀️

@marykateashley what happened? I’m struggling right now after finding a lump and sort of dumpling :((

Hey, totally forgot I never updated. The biopsy showed old abscess material. So they said to leave it 3 months and if any lump still there to go back. But it gradually went down and had no issues since. It's such a worrying thing to have to go through but it really could be anything. The only thing they said was odd about mine was that abscesses are usually within a short time (??) of breastfeeding and I hadn't breastfed for 5 years I think. Keep your fingers crossed and I hope all is well