So how incontinent are you?

[VoluptuaGoodshag]

I'm trying to gauge my own against others to see if I need medical help. Never had any problems up until being a mother. First child was a CS but still significantly incontinent compared to before. Second child was a VBAC and now I'm hopeless.

I have to go to the loo before I do anything. If I'm slightly constipated then the pressure makes it even worse. I find that if I lean ever so slightly forwards (like if I bend over the basin or sink to wash my hands) then it leaks and there is no amount of squeezing can stop it even if I've just been to the loo.

Pah! So how does this compare to anyone else?

while having a wee, tense your muscles to stop the flow of urine

that movement is the one you should be practising (but don't practise while weeing, just do it the once to make sure you are on the right track)

you sound alright tbh princessmel. It's really only a problem if you leak while coughing, laughing, sneezing etc or while exercising or other everyday activities

oh and I don't think getting up in the night is related - that is just having a full bladder, ie your bladder may not hold huge amounts or perhaps you just drink a lot of liquids in the evening

the problem is leaking when you didn't mean to, not needing to go

Thanks f and Z, I think I do them ok but I'm never sure. I don't do them often enough though.

I never needed to wee in the night before I had babies. My bladder ahd changed Now if its not one of the dc waking me its my wee!!

3 weeks and 3 nights omg princessmel I am very sorry for you both

I do find though that if I get up with the children I need to go for a wee, but if I don't (usually the case) I am fine. I can stop the flow of urine while at the toilet but still have the other issues (coughing, running).

VGS, imo (an outpatient physio who has done a bit of womens health Rx) I would definately go and see your GP and ask to see a women's health physio, with the symptoms you are describing. You need to be taught how to switch your pelvic floor muscles on again. the stopping mid wee is OK (as a test) if the pelvic floor is Ok(ish) but you may be squeezing away for England but not getting the right muscles going.

Get thee to a PT!

Don't feel sorry for us f and z!!

I'm feeling ok usually. Sometimes I feel sadder than others. She's still cuddling my tummy when she sees it.
Bedtimes have been fine. No more mentioning of it from her.
And she's still sleeping great.

Dh is very pleased with us.

I'm proud that dd had coped so well. I do feel a bit like I connned her to stop though . She just didn't mention it for a few nights then that was that for her.

I leaked a bit after going to the loo for about a year after DS was born (getting slowly but progressively better as the year went on). I'm OK now, although my bladder feels full a lot more quickly these days, and a glass of of water will go through me in 5 minutes. I was useless with my PF exercises though. Next time I'll be a good girl, honest!

Not at all
I did pfe's in the weeks after giving birth to the dc's but don't do them now.
Agree that you do sound like you may need medical help.

(yes sorry princess mel I phrased that badly. The OMG bit was because how can it have gone so quickly. The very sorry part I just meant to convey sympathy for the mixed feelings I know you have, but it came out all wrong, sorry. Tbh I think 'conning her' to stop is about the best thing you could have done in the circumstances. You felt you wanted to stop and this was a gentle way for her. I am sorry for you both but only in a 'isn't it sad sometimes when they leave a certain stage behind them' way)

yes I am about the same, have to wear panti liners full time, I don't a leak big amount but I do leak and have no control over it really. I did go to the nurse and all they said was to do excercises but I already do, quite distressing but I think thois is just it?
I hate to expense and hassle of wearing PL all the time

link that describes how to check you are doing them correctly

Hi F and Z , I can't believe how quickly it's gone either. Its feels wierd that she had bm for so long and now its been 3 weeks + with nothing.
I know excatly what you mean about sadness at the end of a stage. I hate change with most things in life so this was hard for me.

We're ok though

Mumsnet are you listening?????

Flashing a pelvic floor exercise reminder at the top of the page is a brilliant idea!

Sympathies VG - do get help. I had baby that was over 10lbs and back to back - ended up with episiotomy and bad 3rd degree tear. Sewn up on table with 1 shot of something like you get at dentists. Wasn't told extent of injuries until booking in for 2nd baby 2+ years later. In meantime had been pooing pants occasionally, having dreadful urgency panics (usually in supermarket queue). Used to get stared at for usuing disabled loos when alternative was to poo my pants in public. During this time I had been given fibogel, told I had IBS (which I had years ago but this wasn't the same) - I am a pushy cow and still got fobbed off by a several GPs. The overriding attitude was 'well you've had a baby what do you expect'. Midwife was the answer - everything fantastic after physio involving bio-feedback (equipment up bum, do excercises, see results of doing excercises on computer screen whilst doing them). My brain had needed 're-potty training' - it was processing messages as tho I still had scar tissue or summat. Am not saying this to moan - it's a long time ago. Only written to say that if I hadn't sorted it would be in a right mess by now. Also posting as I think my problem may be more common than I thought - if this is you you are not alone-get help it can be fine.

I definitely have problems now that I never had before my 9lb baby and her big head!

I don't leak when I cough, sneeze, etc. But when bladder is full and I get the urge to go it has to be IMMEDIATELY. I often leak if I can't get to the loo fast enough or while underdoing trousers. I haven't had a major incident. But worry that it could happen if caught short. Strangely sometimes I can use mind over matter and the desperate feeling of urgency will pass. Not sure what I do about this - still PFEs?

Daffodilly I think you may have urge incontinence. Lots of advice on this link

i think my pelvic floor are good
when pg they seem to get much worse (is that normal?) when i retch in the morning i have to concentrate

however i did buy the dc's a skip rope and we all did double dutch - only i felt quite upset after a few minutes

op i do think you should seek help but you can buy continence aids over the counter

i intend to start using them in a few months whether or not i have a real issue - i wan to skip and bounce!

I sneezed twice and very violently on the way home today and had to shut my coat while I mentally assessed damage

was ok

lol franny - its so sad
i feel so unsexy retching and clutching myself!

PFE's very good - and also the basis of Pilates. If you can find the time (!) it would definitely be worth seeing if you have a class locally to you.

I know

I was on phone to dp at the time and told him

thought afterwards "he did not really need to know that did he"

but yes Paula I am sure being pg is not helping us

1. muscles all slacken don't they? or something

2. extra weight on pelvis / pressure on bladder

Your not alone. Mine have not been right since DD 5 years ago she was a 9lb er.

Try PFE but to no avail. Can't run, walk fast, cough, carry heavy things. Infact it makes very depressed. When I had a referral they came checked I was doing them right, checked my bladder was emptying - it was. I am not over weight and when I go doctors on Friday I am going to say its not good enough, I do not want to have to wear a pantyliner and not be paranoid about bathing every day....

Should have probably name changed