I'm hoping I will find some people here who know what it is, because it's a rare genetic condition, and I don't really know who to discuss this with.
My mother was diagnosed with this condition some 8 or 9 years ago, I grew up witnessing her having recurrent migraines, and TIAs.
Since I was a teenager, if I have a headache, I run through names of people I love, their DOB, and things I hate because I remember my mother being offered food she didn't like by my stepdad when she would have her attacks, she wouldn't be able to remember our names, or other small details.
When she got her diagnosis, I tried to distance myself from the chance I could have it.
At the time she told me that it was a 1/2 chance that each of her children had it...again, I didnt really want to listen. I was in my early 20s and didn't want to complicate life with the thought of any illness.
The thing is, I have recently reached 30, and I have to face up to the fact that my memory has been shocking over the past few months. I keep losing things, forgetting where I've put them, I lose my shoes all the time.
I keep forgetting words. I've been putting it down to tiredness.
I've now got a massive migraine, I've had it for about 9 days. I obviously can't drive in this state, I can't get rid of it, I'm in pain from the minute I wake up until I go to sleep, it's affected my eyesight. The pain is increasing.
I know that migraines are a part of Cadasil.
I also do have some mental health disorders that I know my mum said could be a part of the cadasil when she was diagnosed.
I don't know what to do.
I'm scared because I don't want this, my mother was abusive to me, and I have nothing to do with her now, and I feel like this just brings me closer to her, and I'd just prefer to pretend she doesn't exist.
I'm worried that the GP will want proof that my mother has this to send me for a test. I'm worried about how life will change. Will it stop me being able to have a mortgage? Will it stop me having more children?
I have just been quite happily ignoring the possibility that I might have it, but this migraine has just stuck around and its making me confront the possibility.
I. Sorry this is so long and rambly.