Help calm me down - health anxiety

[PatsArrow]

Forgive me for this splurge post but I don't want to annoy my family and friends too much.

In the past couple of years I've lost both my parents to late diagnosed cancer. My mum died in lockdown within 3 weeks of seemingly being fairly fit and healthy. My dad died of bowel cancer a few years before - he was 72, very fit (fitter than me) good diet, very health conscious etc.

Anyway, I realise I'm still grieving them, my mum especially, but I've been seeing a private counsellor for that which has helped.

I have gallstones. I know this as I had an ultrasound a few years ago. Although I was getting occasional sharpe abdominal pains and discomfort the GP said I wasn't really ill enough to go forward with any surgery or even on a waiting list etc. I also had a campylobacter gut infection at the same time and they put most of the problems down to that. It did seem to improve a bit.

Now I'm having problems again. Indigestion, occasional diarrhoea, pains in the upper right hand side of my abdomen, heartburn, wind, shoulder blade pain etc. The GP has sent me for another ultrasound (waiting on that)
However the GP took bloods which I had the results yesterday. She says everything seems fine but I have low iron. I need to do a stool and urine sample. GP said just to check for bowel cancer although she didn't seem too concerned.

Now the health anxiety has kicked in. Low iron can be an early sign of bowel cancer.

To complicate matters as I'm nearly 50 I'm currently very peri menopausal with seemingly constant pmt and lower backache. I occasionally skip a period but still feel all the cramps. Like now. Now I'm thinking all these period-like cramps are really bowel cancer.

I'm constantly tired and feel ill with something. I'm overweight which doesn't help either.

Sorry for the long winging post. I'm not sure what I want people to say really. I just feel so worn down and unwell and yes utterly terrified that I have have cancer. The only experience of cancer I have is totally sudden and devastating cancer.

I just feel so desperate and I'm just waiting.

I’m afraid I have no advice other than to say I have an inherited gene malfunction which can cause Bowel and other cancers.
I moved house and had to register with a new doctor. They did a mini health check and I was found to be anaemic. They asked me to do a fit test and it came back positive.
After further tests I was diagnosed with colon cancer.
I had no signs or symptoms. Nothing at all.
Go with your instinct.
Pester until you’re seen.
Good luck x

OP - I lost my mum to cancer as a teen so I empathise with your health anxiety

With respect, your beloved parents were old so whilst their deaths were heartbreaking for you, it's what happens when we age, our organs pack in for one reason or another.

However, you are 50 so (like me) you're in that grey (pardon the pun) area were it's unlikely to be anything sinister but might be. I know, as over the past few years I've been referred a few times on the 2ww and it's been fine.

Can you pay for a private consultation with a consultant (or two)? It's usually £200 without scans etc but if they feel you need further investigations they can either put you on 2ww or their NHS list. And you will have had the opportunity to discuss your concerns in depth.

Also have a look at the Menopause Matters website to get some advice on dealing with the menopause.

You know this is the time to make dietary changes to lose weight and join the gym to start doing weight bearing exercises. Remember - you and I had experience of cancer being untreatable but in many cases it is manageable and often curable. You're 50, 70 plus so time is on your side.

Be brave and good luck

That should have said you're 50 not 70 plus ...

I haven't lost my parents but I can do relate to the health anxiety when I was first perimenopausal. It was awful. I ended up being referred to 3 different consultants as I was convinced I was suffering from something terrible.

Of course, it's a vicious circle because the anxiety than causes many of the symptoms. It got a lot better once the full menopause hit although I'm going through it again, although a lesser degree since starting hrt.

For me, getting the investigations really helped. My GP said that once something was clear, I'd focus on another possible cancer but it wasn't the case.

I wish you the best, it's tough

Im very anemic at the mo( just had an iron infusion) and a lot of my symptoms( inc the shoulder pain) are very similar to yours.

Just to say, a lot of your symptoms could be gallbladder related. The shoulder pain definitely. Also heartburn. Pain in the right side could be a gallstone moving. I had all of the above. I wasn't aware of any of this at the time and suffered unaware for ages. It really helps to cut fat from your diet. I was told to cut it out completely when waiting for my operation. Discuss this with your doctor. If your iron is low your B12 could be low and your folic acid. I am not medically trained but these things happened to me. I hope this helps even the tiniest bit.

Thanks to everyone who has replied. It helps just to talk about it.

I have an ultrasound on the 9th on upper abdomen and uterus (I think the Gp wanted to scan as much as she could if I was there!) so that's not long to wait.

I think I have a few things going on - with gallstones causing indigestion and general grumbling pain, plus cramps lower abdomen pains that just feel like period pain to me.

Hopefully I'll get up the bottom of it soon. It's exhausting constantly dying of something! But you're all right, the only way to deal with it is to just tick it off one by one.

It's exhausting constantly dying of something

oh god I know what you mean!

@PatsArrow how did you get on with your scan? I hope all is ok. Your symptoms sound just like mine and I've been diagnosed with gallstones, however I was told to watch and wait.

Thanks for asking EII82.

Well I had my bowel cancer test back. Good news there. Nothing suspicious. The scan revealed yet again my gallbladder is packed full of stones and sludge, but because there's no stones stuck anywhere they're not too interested in doing anything.

The worrying thing now is, when I got there my GP had asked them to do an internal ultrasound. They have got back to be to say that the lining of my uterus is thicker than it should be for my age and they're fast tracking my to a gynaecologist to rescan and take a biopsy of lining. A thicker lining could mean cancer of the uterus, or the lining may develop into cancer of the uterus. Sometimes women are offered a hysterectomy.

So now I'm beside myself with worry. I had had lots of grumbling period pain wise but I'm in Peri-menopause....my periods have been pretty regular right up until June.

I'm a bit shocked this has been found.

Good news that your bowel test was clear, that’s a huge relief for you. I wonder why they haven’t suggested removing your gall bladder as it’s full of stones? Perhaps they wait until one stone moves and then deal with it.

I also have health anxiety which started with becoming perimenopausal so have been in and out of our surgery with various aches, pains and worries so know how you feel. I am currently obsessed with a mole on my back that is sore when I have a shower but no problem the rest of the time. Have just contacted gp online so hopefully they will ring tomorrow!

I would say try not to worry about your womb lining but I know that impossible to do so just try not to google too much…

@PatsArrow, I'm sorry to hear about you internal scan results. I completely understand your worry, please keep us updated, will be thinking of you.

That's annoying that they won't do anything about the gallstones. I'm in a similar boat, I have stones with similar symptoms as yours but been told to adopt a watch and wait approach

A thicker lining can be completely and utterly normal you know. I think it's called a bulky uterus. Especially common in women who've had children and those approaching menopause.

It is overwhelmingly likely you have a bulky uterus because ... you have a bulky uterus. No more than that

However you do know you have gallstones and all your symptoms point to that. It's a bit of a shame they won't remove your gallbladder

PercyPigandMe that's reassuring. I think the GP described it as a 'uterus lining thicker than we would expect in a woman your age'. They've fast tracked me for a hyroscopy on the 27th. This must mean they're checking for cancer.

I had my 'period' at the normal time this month but it was not normal. It was blood like I'd cut myself, bright red rather than normal period blood.

I'm absolutely crapping myself. I lost my mum not even a year ago to cancer. She died within 3 weeks. I still have the Whatsapp messages telling her it would all be fine.
How on Earth am I going to be able to calm myself down?

Sorry I know there's not much anyone can say really.

I can totally understand why you're anxious and you've done exactly the right thing going to your gp and getting it checked out rather than putting your head under your pillow. Your gp has been very cautious, getting you fully scanned. You're now on a two week pathway because there are a list of symptoms that if you get one, afford you to be be fast tracked. It doesn't mean if you have one of those symptoms that there's a serious problem. The strong likelihood there isn't, but if there is, you're then in a position to get treatment for a problem they've caught early which gives the best prognosis.
Health anxiety is a bitch but you have been proactive which is absolutely the best thing you could have done. Good luck and let us know how you've gone on.

Thanks NightlyStroll. You speak sense thanks.

I think I've lost my mind. I was doing really well with my councellor and feeling all positive and looking to the future then this....and I feel like I've melted.

But you're right. I just need to go through the tests and hopefully it will be ok.