TRIGGER WARNING - cancer diagnosis final stages

[mummydoingamasters]

Sorry if this is the wrong place to post, I just did a search and posted in the best matched group.

I've just found out my step dad is in his final stages of cancer and has weeks to live.

Our relationship used to be good but when him and my mum divorced and he moved away, we drifted and barely kept in contact. That was both sides, I tried to keep in touch but had resentment that he'd forgotten me with the divorce.
He's my 'dad', he's the only person I know as a father figure but we didn't maintain it after the divorce and now I am just overwhelmed by regrets and 'what if's but obviously keeping this to myself because what selfish arse makes someone's else's cancer about them?

My mum is going to say good bye at the weekend (she has been isolating) and I want to get a feel for whether it's appropriate to send her with a message for him? I just want him to know that it's ok, he's still my dad and I'm going to really fucking miss him.

I'm not trying to make it about me even though it sounds like I am, but there's no hope of me going to see him as I work in a school with positive cases and I would never risk anyone's else's health.

How terribly sad OP.
I imagine he’d be glad to hear from you. Follow your heart and write him a message or pass on what you want to say via your mum. It’s never too late to say what’s important

I think nearly everyone wants peace at the end and I'm sure that would give him peace. It may have played on his mind as it has yours.
Personally I would write a short message your mother could read to him, and she can gauge whether it is appropriate or not (he may not be able to comprehend enough for it to be the right thing or he may be too emotional). My father was too ill to understand much at the end.

Yes I think a heartfelt message, maybe write a couple of good memories, that you have some regret that relationship drifted. Write it in a card. Ask your Mum to read it if he’s not fit to.