Cancer Support thread #78 - Newbies welcome

[MrsPnut]

Welcome friends old and new, to the most supportive thread on Mumsnet. Everyone is welcome whatever stage you're at (fears, diagnosis, treatment). Introduce yourself and say Hi

Good luck to everyone having treatment this week. Hugs to all - especially if you're feeling rubbish (physically, mentally, or waiting for results - ugh

@FizzyOrange I’ll take that advice, I’ve had UC for years so always the opposite problem. I’ll knock it back quickly.

@JeanLannes Welcome to the thread, sit down and we’ll help you wait for treatment to start.

@BadEyeBri How many weeks are you in now? It’s a great feeling when you get to more than half way.

Welcome @JeanLannes sorry you are here but everyone is lovely and will support you all the way.

I have excellent news! I'm isolating before surgery and doing a major spring clean to keep me busy, I have a pretty wooden box on the table next to my armchair and as I dusted it I opened it and its fall of chocolates! Leftover from Christmas but not sure which year, I maybe should do cleaning more often.

@backformore I'll never forget your dh's bday now! Congrats on finishing chemo!!

@MrsPnut glad to hear you are recovering from surgery. I just ordered a couple of MS post-surgery bras.

@JeanLannes warm welcome. You and I have the same diagnosis - ER (neg) Her2(pos) and nodes pos. So I expect our treatments will be
very similar. I'm finished with that chemo and having surgery 22nd.

Good that they are cracking on with chemo. Waiting on the scan results can be scary but this is something they have to do just in case.

I think it's good to tell the kids sooner than later so they follow along bit by bit. My dd15 hasn't really reacted at all - that's just how she is.

My third wig is coming today! Not something I every thought I'd be looing forward to!

@MrsPnut dd was on Movicol for years and I used to mix it with apple juice - she won't tough apple juice now.

@KitchenFishCurry I'm jealous of your chocolate stash - our Easter choc is long gone.

@MrsPnut I'm so happy that your recovery is on track. The relief must be immense

I've just finished week 2. I feel better this week than last.
10th May is last scheduled treatment but I don't have dates for my brachy yet. I've been told I'll be treated as outpatient for these so no overnights hopefully

@JeanLannes hello, welcome to the thread, I'm so sorry you need to be here. That certainly is fast moving, no wonder you're in shock. It is good that there's a treatment plan in place already, although I guess it might be tweaked after the scans and MDT meeting.

There is guidance on the Macmillan website re talking to DCs about a diagnosis and I know other people here have found it useful.

Welcome to all newcomers. I hope you find the thread as useful and comforting as I have. I've got BC ER/PR+ HER2+ and had my penultimate chemo last week. In some ways it has gone quickly, but in the thick of chemo side-effects it goes very slowly!

We've booked a short break to Devon after my last chemo & before mastectomy. The place has a hot tub which I guess I shouldn't technically go in but you try stopping me

For those of us facing mastectomy, there's a fab facebook page called Jen's Friends where you can order an underarm heart-shaped pillow for a min cost of £4. They are sewn by volunteers and look so cheery.

@MrsPnut Sending good wishes for your continuing recovery.

@HauntedDishcloth I just ordered an underarm pillow that has cats on it from another site!

Hi. I posted here a few weeks ago them felt a bit overwhelmed. I, feeling a lot better now and more ready to post. I have grade 3 invasive ductal breast cancer with low grade DCIS, oestrogen receptor positive. Will need Herceptin so starting with Chemo and Herceptin, then surgery then more treatment.
I’m starting chemo on the 19th. I have a couple of questions. My hairdresser can’t fit me in to give me a short cut, so will probably get do to shave my head once hair starts falling out. Did any of you do this or do you think I should get an interim cut? I’m also 8nterested in recommendations for head coverings, good sun cream for my head and tips for what to take to chemo sessions.
Thanks for reading.

@JeanLannes welcome to the nicest thread on MN with the kindest ladies you will find. There is so much friendship and support here. You must feel very rushed with the chemo starting so soon but it is good that they are starting treatment, I had to wait 3 months from my initial gynaecology appointment to starting chemo and it was dreadful. Once I started treatment, I felt that at least something was being done to help me and hope you feel the same.

@MrsPnut pleased your surgery is over and I hope your recovery goes well.
Welcome @JeanLannes I'm still fairly newly diagnosed with my BC.
My surgery is the same day as yours @Acinonyx2
I find it quite daunting coming on here, not because of the people, it's just the fact it's cancer stuff. I think as I've not started treatment or had surgery yet, I still feel slightly removed from the reality of it.

@Vinorosso74 I'm feeling the same my head knows I'm having surgery but keeps forgetting that the reason is because I have cancer. I'll be having radiotherapy later and hormone blockers but they don't think chemo.

@KitchenFishCurry, I'll also be on hormone blockers, very likely radiotherapy, unsure on chemo until they've checked the lymph nodes during the surgery and they need to do tests on the tumour.
Apologies if I've missed it but when is your surgery?

My surgery is this Monday, I'm having lumpectomy with reconstruction and lymph biopsy done as a day case so should be home Monday night all going well.

I hope it goes smoothly on Monday.
I'm having a mastectomy and reconstruction plus the lymph node biopsy as a day case too. They started doing it as a day case when Covid hit last year and apparently has worked well.

It's hard to believe it can be done as a day case. When DD was born 23 years ago I had to stay in overnight because I had 2 stitches. I don't want to stay in it will only be if my surgery starts later and I'm still groggy (how will they know). The nurses are going to ring each day to check how much fluid is in the drain and then the drain should be out on Friday

I was a bit worried about the drain but the nurse assures me it's ok.

The nurses gave me a bag to carry the drain in and DD has customised it .

@Vinorosso74 surgery buddies!

I'm not crazy about drains either and I have warned them I am a big baby wrt surgery and very squeamish!

@KitchenFishCurry thinking of you Monday.

The drains are fine, I was shown by the BCN at my pre op appointment how to empty them and revac them and then the nurse went over it again before I came home. I have 3 drains in and 2 pico dressing pumps so my bag is quite heavy.

The only painful part is my node clearance site, my two breast reconstructions are not at all painful but that may be due to the pico dressings which provide negative pressure. I’ve reduced my pain relief down to just paracetamol, with the odd 5ml of morphine once or twice a day.
I was given a drain bag by the nurses and a heart pillow as well as a surgical bra to take with me that they put on you after surgery and before you come round.

Just popped in to catch up.
Bridget sending hugs.
@Lunificent, I just saw your other thread. I had a similar diagnosis almost 2 years ago. I had shoulder length hair when diagnosed and got an interim pixie cut. I would recommend that if you can. You may then have a few weeks after you start chemo before your hair goes. It varies depending on type of chemo. I bought a couple of wigs , which I wore for " best" but basically lived in little hats. Just search for chemo hats. I bought dozens.

Thanks Skap. I will see if I can find a hairdresser to fit me in.

@Lunificent I also had a couple of weeks after my first chemo before my hair started to shed. I currently wear a scarf 24 hours a day as the sight of my bald head really distresses me. You can buy all sorts of headwear very reasonably on Amazon. I recently bought a couple of ready made turbans which you just put on like a hat. I think I will feel even more self conscious in a wig but may feel differently in the summer so haven't bought one yet.

I don't take much for chemo - they have pillows and blankets, as many as you want, but you do have to ask for them. Food and drinks are supplied constantly in my unit so I just take my phone and something to read. One thing I would say is to wear elasticated trousers for the loo as you only have one free hand with the cannula in the other.

Thanks for your reply Fizzy Orange. I live in jeans so will have to buy some more comfy clothes.

@Bloodybridget good luck on 24th April. I am still waiting on mine. It better not be late May as su am banking on early to mid-May.

Re: head gear, I recommend Eadiechops turbans. I tried a scarf from a Breast Cancer Niw recommended site but I just looked like a total cliché of a cancer patient. My preference for turbans is because they almost look like a conscious choice of head gear. With a bit of a wig fringe poking out I looked totally “normal”. I know I shouldn’t be so secretive about the fact I have had cancer but I just can’t help it. I know it’s not my fault I have developed it (f genetics!!!) but in a weird way I want to keep it a secret from all but the closest family (and work). I don’t want sympathy of strangers, however well meant.

This cancer shit sure messes with my perception of the world around me, that’s for sure.