Is it worth paying for a yearly health check?

[Coppercreek]

Hi all,

So long story short I've been getting bouts of being anxious about my health and having a lot of nightmares about dying etc and leaving my kids (9,7 and 6) it's been something that has been building since my DS was diagnosed with autism and the worry of who would care for him etc.

I'm only 28 and in reasonable health but am wondering if a yearly health check up would help soothe this anxiety a bit?

Has anyone had them and do you find them useful? Who do you use? I've seen BUPA and Nuffield do them? Does anyone have any recommendations.

I'm not sure that would help if you have health anxiety.

Rather than reducing your anxiety it is more likely to increase it by reinforcing to your mind that there is a legitimate reason to be so anxious. "I need these tests because otherwise..." " if I miss these tests something awful will happen... " "they haven't tested for xyz, what if..."

It might be more useful to try counselling or CBT first. You can self refer through the NHS.

It's not constant anxiety as such but every couple of months I will have a nightmare about dying and for a couple of days after I do feel a lot of worry about what would happen to the kids if anything happened to me. Part of that may be that we don't have any family who would be in a position to look after them and I don't think DP would cope alone as he struggles now with me doing most of it.

I just felt like maybe having a checkup will give me a good idea of whether I am actually healthy and what changes I could make to keep myself as healthy as I can be.

That's what I mean though. Because then you'll be going away afterwards and worrying that you had less than perfect blood pressure or whatever. And then fixating on needing to change xyz to protect yourself.

And then you're in a vicious cycle of anxiety that feeds itself.

Plus no check up will look at everything which leaves more routes for you to worry about.

Anxiety doesn't have to be constant to have a detrimental impact on your life or to be worth seeking help. In fact I would say better to seek help now and nip it in the bud before it becomes a bigger problem.

Do you both have wills? Do they set out your wishes for your children?

If you were going to do anything practical in response to these feelings, that seems to me to be the most likely to give you some peace of mind.

We do but the person we had nominated to care for the DC is becoming rapidly unsuitable and have no other suitable family members. Both had pretty dysfunctional upbringing with our own parents and other than 1 sibling we wouldn't trust any of them with a goldfish.

The one we had nominated unfortunately has a terminal illness and I do worry about them having to go in to care / being split up / autistic DS not having the care and understanding he needs.

Or worse them being given to one of the other siblings. 1 who hasn't seen them for years and who outright said when DS was diagnosed not to leave him to them but they'd take my 'normal' kids

The other 2 have had social services intervention with their own children, infact 1 had her eldest removed due to neglect.

I know at 28 my chances of dying before they reach adulthood is slim. But keeping myself healthy is on my mind, eating a bit healthier, trying to excersize and lose some weight (I am classed as obese) and cutting down on the booze. I have already given up smoking.

I also have a good life insurance policy to ensure they are financially cared for should anything happen... and protected so that they are provided for without whoever is caring for them being able to access it all and make bad decisions with it.

This was upped last year as I hadn't changed it since we had our eldest. With DS needs i felt more would be needed and more weighted towards a trust for DS for care etc