Talk me into going to dentist... I hate my teeth

[WaterBottle123]

40 years old, not been to dentist in 8 years. In my defence I was widowed when pregnant 7.5 years ago and self care hasn't been much of a priority.

But now I'm terrified I'm going to get yelled at and told all my teeth are falling out. My lower teeth are moving together at the front which I understand isn't massively unusual for my age especially with two kids and many years breastfeeding. Teeth are yellow, I've never had white teeth, dream of getting them whitened.

So I have crocked, yellow teeth and would love cosmetic work, but I'm scared and paranoid that I've left it too long and they'll just tell me my teeth are riddled with decay.

Any experiences? I can pay for treatment, I don't mind the pain, it's just the yelling and the fear of unknown bad news...,

Should add - the DC do go to the dentist of course, I wouldn't neglect that!

If you tell the dentist when you book that you are a nervous patient and haven’t been for 8 years, I would expect them to be very gentle with you. They will just be pleased you have gone rather than delaying even longer. Any dentist worth their salt will not yell! Maybe ask on local forums for dentists who are extra gentle or good with nervous patients?

They may find some decay (although perhaps not if you have brushed and flossed) but they aren’t going to yell at you about it, they’ll just tell you what needs to be done.

They can also advise on whitening. The usual process is trays you fill with whitening gel and wear at home for a certain number of hours for say 2 weeks. However you may well find that once you teeth have had a thorough clean by the dentist or hygienist, they will look so much whiter you won’t feel the need. A lot of the yellow is likely to be built up plaque and tartar which has stained and can be removed.

Overlapping lower teeth is pretty standard due to wisdom teeth (annoying!) You can use Invisalign or train tracks to correct but then you have to wear a retainer at night forever or it goes back, apparently! I’ve learned to live with mine.

Thank you @minipie! Is decay actually treatable then?

I hadn't been for a number of years (got messed around by previous dentist with them cancelling appointments and never got around to registering with a new dentist).
Anyway, my teeth were discoloured in places. There was nothing needed doing except a hygienist visit. She cleaned them so well and got rid of all the discolouration and stains.
When I told the dentist it was a few years since I'd seen a dentist; he just said not to worry, you're here now. No judgement at all.
If will be okay.

@Vinorosso74

Thank you and I'm glad your visit was successful

If there is decay you may need fillings but unless you've been experiencing pain it's probably not bad.
I finally got an appointment at the dentist last week after last years' was cancelled. I've got to have three fillings replaced (20+year old ones) & one new but I'd rather it was done sooner rather than later.

@APurpleSquirrel no pain, thankfully!

I wouldn't mind a load of fillings if I could then have some whitening and alignment work.

I've before so bad at just burying my head in the sand since DH died, about many things, including teeth!!

Have made an appointment for next week, can't wait for it to be over with.

In my anxious brain they'll tell me all my teeth need extraction and I need dentures at 40.

Bloody lockdown induced anxiety

Oh well done OP! I expect they will recommend a follow up appointment with a hygienist for a thorough clean (unless the dentist does that themselves) so bear that in mind.

They can’t reverse decay but if they find decay then having a filling will remove the diseased part and - most importantly- stop it getting any worse.

It’s very unlikely you will need all your teeth extracting! If your teeth were that awful you would know... you’d be in pain for a start.

Breathe! It will be ok.

Thanks @minipie!

I know, rational me knows if my teeth were that bad I'd be able to see/feel it. So easy to obsess during lockdown isn't it?

Keep frantically starring at my gums..but they aren't bleeding or red...

Honestly I'm boring myself at this point!!

Oh gosh, this was basically me a couple of weeks ago! I hadn't been for about 6 years! Luckily the dentist was lovely and there were no issues with my teeth. Got booked in with the hygienist afterwards and that was fine too. Now determined to keep up with check ups so I never have that dread again!

Yay! That is the biggest hurdle

@Ithinkhedidit

Thank you for sharing and so pleased you had no issues :)

Well done on making the appointment. No dentist is ever going to judge you or shout at you. They got into the profession to help people. I would imagine you prob need a few fillings but if you aren’t in pain or missing chunks of tooth I wouldn’t expect any more invasive work. My bottom teeth are on the move too. Pregnancy and age. I go to the dentist regularly and nothing would have stopped it.

My New Year resolution was to get my teeth sorted out, as a very nervous patient who faints in the chair I hadn't been in 6 years!
Off I went to the dentist on 29th December to prepare, expecting a big long list of things that needed doing that we would have to spread over all of 2021, and he said they were fine! I was so surprised I asked him to repeat himself.

There's a good chance you won't need anything other than a clean, so be positive :)

Thank you @Dgall and @Hardchoices this is all very reassuring.

It's a sod how children impact our teeth isn't it?

I was terrified of going to the dentist for the first time in years. I was convinced they'd shout at me too. At previous dentists (in years long past) I've always had the check up followed by the hygienist, but this one booked me in so I saw the hygienist before seeing the dentist. I'd ask to do it that way around again in future.

The hygienist woman was lovely too. I told her I was worried I'd get in trouble for the state of my teeth and she laughed. I realised how stupid it was... We are grown ups after all! The dentist didn't shout at me either, and I felt much more confident seeing her after my teeth had been scrubbed and polished by the hygienist!

I still want to get my teeth professionally whitened and possibly straightened with Invisalign, as they've gone a bit crooked since having my dd and now overlap in places, but they really did look a lot better after they'd been cleaned by the hygienist and I felt a lot less self conscious about them. Oh and I was very surprised to find out that I didn't need any fillings. I had assumed my teeth would be rotting as I'd had a difficult few years leading up to that appointment and really had not been taking good care of my teeth.

@BaggoMcoys

So glad all was ok for you and thanks for sharing. Definitely the same here with a difficult few years, lone parenting newborn and tot, full time work etc. Being 40 has motivated me to sort teeth, hair and weight out!

I, too, was ashamed at how many years went by without a dentist visit once I no longer had to arrange it for the children, now grown up... a combination of my lovely dentist retiring, one or two bad experiences with unnecessary fillings years ago which made me suspicious of the 'pay per job' nature of NHS dentistry, and not having any pain or mouth symptoms.

When I did go (quite recently), I was dreading it, but all is well! 👍 Xrays show no decay, a good session with the hygienist, and I'm good to go.

This does make me question the shibboleth of '6 monthly checkups for everyone' but that's a separate issue!

Thank you @Walkacrossthesand and glad everything was ok for you!

Appointment is tomorrow at 9, I don't think I'll sleep tonight

I went for the first time in 7 or 8 years, because I was terrified - I wasn't at all scared of my old dentist but he left and the new one was awful. I was the same as you, convinced I'd need all my teeth out! I found a new dentist, and I only needed 2 fillings.

Oh well done WaterBottle! I’m sure it will be fine - the anticipation is much worse than the actual visit!