Cancer support thread #72 - come in, we're here for you

[Bloodybridget]

Welcome to the new support thread for anyone who has cancer, at whatever stage of treatment, is worried about symptoms, or is waiting for tests or results.

This is the place to worry, moan, ask questions, share experiences and good and bad news, and celebrate milestones!

If you've got a loved one with cancer then your best place for support is probably on the Life-Limiting Illness board.

Our previous thread is here

Current members, please do introduce yourselves

Bloodybridget - sorry you’ve had such a tough day. It’s so horrible seeing those percentages in black and white. I know you’ve said you don’t want to discuss with your oncologist but is there a possibility it might stop your mind racing? Even to say “I saw these figures and I’m freaked out?”

Everyone’s different so you need to do what works for you. I couldn’t find up to date stats for my stage of melanoma so asked my oncologist - she told me the latest research results and said “these are reliable stats”. I don’t think having the numbers made things better or worse, but I did know that they were more accurate than anything Dr Google would tell me, so there was no point searching any more!

Hope your appointment goes ok tomorrow

Am I allowed to send you virtual hugs bridget or will I be mocked elsewhere on MN 😂? Anyway, take them if you want them. Reading the stats/research papers is like picking at a scab, you know you shouldn't do it but some days you just can't help yourself. The Stats for Inflammatory BC are shit, but I still look from time to time. I guess we are all just hoping that we fall on the better side of the equation.

Statistics are very sobering; I never know what to think. I read on medical sites that I've got 24 months (so 12, really, as I'm a year past diagnosis), and then I see women on social media who are still here several years later. I have no idea what to think, but I try to hold on to the fact that I feel ok today.

toofarout that's a good thought re getting reliable stats from the oncologist. If I was seeing her on my own, I might, but DP will be with me, and I think that conversation would be very upsetting for her, and if she cried, I would, and probably vice versa! Also my appointment isn't until 4.15, they'll be running an hour late by then and it's hard not to feel the pressure to get out as fast as possible. I did wonder yesterday about calling an ovarian cancer information line. On the whole I think I should just try to forget about it for now, concentrate on getting through the end of treatment, getting better and enjoying life for as long as I can.
Snows a hug is very welcome, if anyone else mocks just send them my way and I'll give them a punch on the nose! As BitOfFun says, some of us will be lucky, no matter what the stats say.
Thanks to all for kind messages, I know a lot of us are coping with unfavourable odds. Dum spiro, spero will be my motto!

Good luck to bridget and anyone else with appointments today.

Bridget. It is hard when you are feeling responsible for DP's fears too but I get that exactly. If the stats are playing on your mind and wont stay in that box then perhaps a call to Macmillan or similar might help to give a different perspective.

The thing about stats is that not only are they usually out of date, they do not deal with individuals but populations and often in quite a crude way. If the research papers tried to distinguish between outcomes for individuals each with differing situations no overview at all would be possible.

I hope your appointment this afternoon goes well and that they are not running too late. I know that cant always be helped but it is not great either.

Thanks so much meercat and catnidge. I do feel OK now. Have lovely neighbour coming for a coffee this morning who had breast cancer 5 years ago, she has been tremendously supportive to both of us, always happy to share experience with a very matter-of-fact way. So might have a chat with her about the evils of Googling!

Glad you're feeling better bridg. I've not really asked about stats, or researched them other than in the broadest terms. Seemed a bit pointless really given that my chance of a recurrence after previous DCIS was something like 2%, and here I am dealing with a her2+ lump! It's all meaningless and educated guesswork!

My spots and ulcers are improving. Now I have an itchy skin rash on my chest and the backs of my hands. When will this stop?? Docetaxel....the chemo that keeps on giving...

WTF Are the itchy patches due to light sensitivity? I had those on my hands until I realised that I had to wear long mittens. (In June and July!) I found that sparing use of hydrocortisone cream helped keep it under control.

I've had my monthly hospital treatment today- it was surprisingly prompt. I've got the rest of the day to chill out now.

Could be meercat , though i rang the helpiline this morning and they didnt say that. ....dry sensitive skin they said iI dont think it is and suggested aqueous cream (which made it itch like mad so I washed it off) and said I could take piriton, so I was just off to Boots.

Light sensitivity makes sense though...it's on the back of both hands and this morning is on my upper chest and actually yes it's in the v area that my cardigan doesn't cover, if you know what I mean. Odd that I should get it now after my last chemo. How long did you have to keep covered for? No one has said anything about this at the chemo unit!

@Bloodybridget just wanted to give you a bit of a hand hold for this afternoon , whichever way you decide to approach it.Hope the appointment isn't delayed too much, that time in the waiting room is very stressful.

Feeling polaxed today, nausea, headaches dizziness. Must be the Herceptin, the leaflet says there are often side effects with the first dose that dont recur with subsequent ones.

It's an irregular red pinprick rash...very itchy!

Did you have anything else yesterday skap or just the herceptin?
Sounds like a feet up day for you and for BirOfFun

WTF it does sound just like the light sensitivity I had. It lasted 3-4 weeks after chemo finished. I think it got worse after the chemo finished because I was having Piriton with the chemo. Keeping it covered helped. Just one more of the endless delights of cancer treatment.

meant to say that I also used high factor sun protection until it had quite gone. That was the advice of the chemo unit nurses.

Ok thanks meercat that's really helpful to know. I've just got antihistamine tablets and hydrocortisone cream so hopefully that'll sort it but will be slapping on the factor 30 as well.
Yep, always something to keep.us guessing!

@WTF99 yes I had third chemo dose as well, it's just that with the previous 2 chemos the side effects didn't kick in until day 3/4. How weird to get brand new symptoms after your last dose. Sounds like you've got lots of stuff to try. I find certirezine good for itchy rashes.

Hope you had a good chilled day BitOfFun - does your monthly treatment leave you feeling shit or just "here we go again" weary?

Being in Aus I was glad Chemo for me was over Autumn/Winter as I was warned about sun sensitivity too. I am now protecting my post Rads sore skin - it's forecast to hit 30 by midday today - but I will be safely in the shade with a high neckline!

Sleep tight everyone.

I do feel somewhat shit, yes, but I'm trying to get ahead of it this cycle by taking anti-diarrhoea tablets before they become a necessity .

Morning all, afternoon to Snows!
WTF sorry you have the rash, hope it responds to something. All your post-chemo travails remind me of one of those fairy tales where the protagonist is overcoming some fearsome beast/wizard/evil sorceress that's flinging one obstacle after another at her/him in a vain attempt to come out on top. But they will have to give up in the end!
BitOfFun hope you can have a peaceful day today and that your bowels behave themselves.
Skap sorry you were feeling rough yesterday, hope you had a good night's sleep and are a bit better today. Nausea and headache is a horrible combination.
DP and I did talk about the survival stats briefly, she said of course she'd read them too! And that I should ask the oncologist if I wanted. She's said several times that she doesn't want me to keep worries to myself so I don't know why I do. Anyway we decided we would focus on getting through the treatment and enjoying remission.
The neighbour who came over yesterday lost her hair when she had chemo, and had a very expensive wig made, which she kindly offered me when I went bald, but I declined. Yesterday I was applying for my Freedom Pass online and needed to send a passport type photo, I didn't have anything on my computer and didn't really want to be looking at myself as I am now for the next however many years, so I borrowed the wig! Photo quite comical but better than the alternative.
My neutrophils were a bit low yesterday so they will have to repeat bloods tomorrow, please cross your fingers I'm ok for chemo.
Wishing everyone a good day, whatever you're doing.

Bridget fingers duly crossed for you.

How nice of your neighbour to lend you her wig for the picture. It must have felt strange to see yourself with someone else's hairstyle!

WTF I hope the rash itch is under control and BitofFun good thinking to head off the dire rear before it takes hold.

Having lunch with our lovely eldest grandson today. I hope you all have a lovely day too whatever yopu will be doing.

Good morning everyone,
Please may I join your group?
I was diagnosed with Stage 1 Ovarian Cancer 2 weeks ago.
It came as a terrible shock as I had absolutely no idea and was only discovered because I had investigations for something else.
I am meeting the surgeon tomorrow and surgery is planned for Monday.
I have completely gone to pieces and just can’t cope with anything, me and DH are both childminders so have the added stress of having no income while we are closed. We have done nothing but argue in the last few weeks and I really don’t know if our relationship will survive this.
Everyone keeps telling me to stay strong and keep positive that surgery will cure it and no further treatment will be required but I just haven’t got the strength at the moment. 😢

Oh Fudges, I am very sorry. Welcome to the thread, you will find lots of support and useful advice here. If it's any comfort to you, being diagnosed at stage 1 is incredibly rare for ovarian cancer. Hopefully the surgery will get everything out, have they said if you will have chemo afterwards or does it depend on what they find during and after surgery?
I was diagnosed with stage 2, grade 3 ovarian cancer in May, all being well will have my last chemo treatment tomorrow. Do ask anything you want.
Very hard for you and your DH to come to terms with this, but Macmillan can advise on money matters, please do call them. There may be benefits you are entitled to. Would your DH not be able to work at all while you are off?

fudges I am sorry to hear about your diagnosis. The shock is tremendous and you will be having major surgery while you are still reeling from it. Do you have family nearby or good friends who will step up? Feel free to come here and let off steam or ask for advice. Lots of people with different cancers including some like Bridget with ovarian.

@Bloodybridget I'm glad you had that conversation with DP. I get the feeling you two are very close and trying to protect each other from the darkest fears. All fingers crossed for your neutrophils.
BOF hope you don't go the opposite way with your pre-emptive strike.

Well having slept much of the day on the sofa yesterday I expected a sleepless night. Ended up sleeping 10.5 hours and feeling much better today.