Hand hold please - dentist phobic & toothache

[MistyReturns]

I've got to make myself an emergency appointment. I've always had this dental fear, my dentist surgery are brilliant with me though. I'm just so scared & ashamed of my teeth. I'm scared ill get a telling off, or all my teeth are dead & fucked. The cost, the pain, the being trapped and vulnerable in the chair.
Please talk me down

I can't get an appointment today anyway 😢

And I got an appointment. Worst fears came true

Have you had your appointment already? Or is it still to come?

I've had an appointment (thank you for replying - I didn't want to be needy & desperate, but I think my posts weren't in prime time). Massive abscess which he mostly drained (ow). Huge anti biotic prescription which the pharmacy called to confirm (and are making me feel really ill} but the worst. I have to have 2 front teeth removed and a plate in. I'm mortified embarrassed and feel so scared about it all. The dental surgery are being so kind and it's all racing through to save me thinking and worrying but still I feel sick each time I think of it.

Oh god, I totally understand. Massive dentist phobic here

You are already one step ahead though if, as you said in your OP, you already have a dentist who is brilliant.

I'm so lucky how great they are. I cried a lot. Part of me wants to implore fellow dental phobic to keep trying & going as the alternative is what I'm now facing. But a big cow part of me is just sobbing in a corner. False teeth at 42. I have fucked up massively

Sounds as though you have been very brave so far and should be proud of yourself, you have done really well and hopefully the worse of it is done now. At least you have a nice dentist!

My friend’s husband has his two front teeth on a plate because they were knocked out in a car accident when he was in his early twenties. He’s now late fifties, and I swear I never knew - I’ve known him for 15 years and always thought he had great looking teeth!

Tomorrow is the big day. 2 front teeth extracted & the plate in. Obviously I'm a "little" (totally) scared. Does anyone have any advice? What painkillers should I stock up on, or any other magic product. What should I think of for food. Will I talk funny - if so how long for? I can't remember anything my dentist told me. I remember asking him if when they made the replacement if they coukd straighten it as my natural teeth have always been crooked. If I've got to go through this at least I can have a silver lining. He said yes - but I wonder if he was just being nice. I mean it is NHS not a cosmetic private thing so I was probably being CF.
Any words of wisdom?

Really don't want to look needy & desperate but could do with any advice that anyone may havr

When I have to have dental work done I put headphones in my ears and play music and just really try to focus on the music. I think things like 'by the time song X is over, Y will be done'. Good luck.

I really feel for you and hope it goes ok.
Do you have anyone to come with you?

Take a deep breath… I used to have a terrible fear of the dentist, and I learned a foreign language during a root canal to try to take my mind off of it… I am very afraid of the dentist, but I love languages and I had a Greek dentist. She is fantastic.

Do you take music, or something you enjoy listening to while you were at the dentist? Can somebody go with you?

I have started to run dental programs this past year, and I have gotten to know my fair share of dentists, dental hygienists, you name it… They are people, just like anyone else, they like music, they like sweets… Even though they won't tell you… But the bottom line is, they are there to help you. Being in pain is awful, but if you don't take care of it now, it will not get better. I have been there… Believe me. And just think of the good things you like to eat. You can eat them when your teeth are in good condition, and you're not in pain.

I did consider earphones, but worry that I won't be aware of anything he needs me to do? Like move or swallow etc? He always has really nice v classic music playing anyway. H has taken the day off work, but I've told him to stay at home & wait. I'm a weirdo - in my hours of need I actually don't want people near me.
I'm looking forward to being able to bite into a sandwich or fajita. I can eat but I'm having to knife & fork every morsel.
I have really silly worries. The pain isn't fazing me (I have a long term chronic pain illness so that's not on my scale) but I keep thinking I'm going to have a dentures glass on my bedside table. I'm not exactly a looker anyway, but being a toothless crone is scary.

I feel your pain and worry .You can get a prescription for diazapam to help keep you relaxed ,if the appointment is in the afternoon get it morning and take an hour before .Good luck.

You poor thing OP, hope you get some sleep and good luck for tomorrow. I think you are being very brave.

I had a load of dental work a couple of years ago because of clenching my teeth and wrecking them. I am not particularly scared of the dentist, but am really scared of injections, so I really sympathise. Things that helped me were:

Being totally honest about being nervous. My dentist is really lovely and gets the nurse to hold my hand during injections.

I had appointments at a time when I wouldn’t have to go back to work afterwards.

I brought lavender oil and put it round my nose just before going in.

I also brought something to fiddle with in my hands. It sounds silly but I took one of my cat’s beanbag toys (mainly because it was small, not because of the cat!) and squeezed it instead of clenching my fists or gripping the chair arms. Something like a Rubik’s cube woukd be good.

I had a “nice thing” planned for after every appointment. A bunch of flowers, an online order waiting at home, a lovely dinner. Just something I could look forward to.

When I went in, I would say to myself “by XY time I will be walking out of here, and this treatment will be over”. My dentist knew about this one, and she would say “we’re AB minutes in, CD minutes to go”. I had root canals which took AGES but I think an extraction will be quite fast!

Will be thinking of you tomorrow. I went to every appointment on my own, even though my DP offered to come to every single one. I didn’t want him to see me all upset and vulnerable, but I was really so grateful he was at home waiting for me afterwards. I generally felt quite triumphant after each appointment - hopefully you will too!

You will need a lift home.
As Judy said I too have a friend who lost her front teeth in a car accident. I would never have guessed.
Stock up on paracetamol and ibuprofen. If you feel out of it, write down every time you take some, so you don't take too many.

Up with a tooth abscess at the moment and found this, I have had loads of teeth removed and the front teeth are generally easier than the back ones, are they top or bottom, as it is just 2 the plate won’t feel too big so speaking should be fine, it sounds like you are having an immediate denture so eating shouldn’t be too bad but eat soft stuff to start with. I just keep my dentures in a cup in the bathroom, don’t use a glass as you can see through it. Good luck with it all

Thank you everybody.

I have a fear of the dentist just like you @MistyReturns mine isn't the injections but it's lying back in the char, my dentist is brilliant, she knows to keep talking to me about everything she's doing and she tells me I always have to tell her if the lying back becomes to much so she can sit me back up till I'm ready again. I rarely do this but I think having the option helps me loads. Tell you're dentist about you're fear/ worries a good dentist should be very understanding.

Like the above poster I reward/treat myself after every appointment which is fun!

Good luck Op 💐 Will be thinking of you, you'll be okay x

All done. Not particularly a pleasant day out, but very quick. The result is good. He has adjusted the crooked look too.
Thanks for all your support x

That’s good. Glad it was a good result for you

Thanks. I hope you get your abbcess sorted soon. So painful I know. It was a relief when he drained it (although painful at the time). I think I took more co-codamol in the time before getting my appointment than I'm happy with.
Just trying to get used to it now. Speech is funny but not impossible. Eating awful. Just took 25 minutes to eat a bowl of soup - and I couldn't even finish that. The constant mouthful of saliva is awful though... I'm not an attractive proposition at the minute! Although I will be 2 stone lighter if this continues. Silver lining.

Thanks, I’m up again in the small hours, feeling horrible, went yesterday and had it drained, face is swollen round jaw so got 2 lots of antibiotics, extraction due later this month.

The saliva thing does get better as your mouth gets used to it, also eating, I find I slice fruit like apples as dentures don’t have the same power as normal teeth but I have many false ones top and bottom now, I’m early 60s.

If the rest of your teeth are good and as you are only 42 would implants be an option in the future as I think if you are younger it is much easier to have them as the bone hopefully will be quite good, I have too many to have implants and would most likely need bone grafts as well so not worth it.