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anyone else suffer from a phobia about driving on motorways? I have to overcome this. Help needed please

141 replies

cruisemum1 · 03/08/2007 16:07

anyone?

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cruisemum1 · 05/08/2007 20:21

and btw - i have found an A road route which i am planning on taking but there are some big dual carriageways/A roads. Am particularly dreading the A3 which is classed as a motorway . Anyone got any experience of it?

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CrookshanksinJimmyChoos · 05/08/2007 20:22

I'm terrified too! You aren't the only one! I live in Bristol and my family are in Plymouth. Would love to be able to just hop in the car on the days I don't work and go down for a couple of days, but thought of driving at 60mph for any length of time with DS in the back makes me feel ill with the responsibilty!!

Pinions · 05/08/2007 20:23

THANKK GOODNESS for this thread I thought I was the only one!!

Not so much a phobia of me driving myself on the motorway (although I have to admit this is an ordeal in itself), but more being driven by someone else, and that could be anyone.

Put me on a plane/train anyday!

Will read up on this thead later, {{{phew}}}.

littlelapininhercar · 05/08/2007 20:24

Had my first go on a motorway yesterday, and I thought I would be terrified, but it was OK. In fact, it was a bit worrying how easy I found it to get up to 80 mph and overtake people .

But now I have to try it without DH in the car - a scarier proposition!

cruisemum1 · 06/08/2007 08:11

littlelapin - well done you . You must have felt like you had climbed a mountain! Wish i was in your shoes right now with the journey successfully behind me!

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cruisemum1 · 06/08/2007 08:11

crookshank/pinions - are you planning on ever drivig on a MW?

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mummydoit · 06/08/2007 08:20

I have a lot of sympathy with people posting here. I didn't pass my driving test till I was 37 and, until recently, could count the number of times I drove on motorways on one hand. Since DH got ill, I've had to drive him to hospital appointments which involve taking the M25 in rush hour. He then had two epileptic fits which mean he's banned from driving for a year so I now have to do all the driving. So, if I didn't do motorways, we wouldn't be able to visit family (who all live long distances away) or go on holiday or go on many day trips. I've just had to bite the bullet and do it. The surprising thing is how easily I got used to it. The first few trips, my hands were gripping wheel, I had sweaty palms and my heart was pounding. Now, I don't give it a second thought. Just persevere, accept that you feel nervous but don't let it put you off and you WILL get used to it. It really is worth getting over the phobia as you never know when you might have to drive in an emergency so it's just as well to be comfortable in all driving conditions. I bet you in a few months time, you'll be whizzing down the outside lane, complaining about all the middle lane hoggers and wishing they'd raise the speed limit to 90!

littlelapininhercar · 06/08/2007 08:21

Can I just add, with the cockiness of a new driver, that my instructor says it's actually dangerous to drive too slowly in the slow lane. You force everyone into the middle lane, and then that gets congested, and also people become frustrated and drive too aggressively in response. On your test they actually mark you down for going too slowly as it is considered dangerous.

(72 hours experience talking )

mummydoit · 06/08/2007 08:24

Littlelapin, you have a good point. Driving too slowly is just as dangerous as driving too fast, especially on motorways. I know a few people on here have commented that you can stick in the inside lane at 60 and just slow down to let people merge but I wouldn't recommend it. People joining the motorway will be a) expecting you to move over and b) expecting you to be going a bit faster so they may well misjudge their approach. Even if you stick in the inside lane, do be prepared to move over for joining traffic and try to keep up to 70!

Well done on passing the test, LL.

littlelapininhercar · 06/08/2007 08:26

Thank you . I am trying to think of a reason to take DS out for a drive today .

elasticsortinghandstand · 06/08/2007 08:27

i have never done it and passed test 13 yearsago.
i likedriving fast on duel carriageways though, love it, but it is that extra lane that freaks me out!
and of course slip road, when dh gets on to it i am soooo scared.

mummydoit · 06/08/2007 08:52

Elastic, I guess the Dartford Crossing toll booths are a no-no for you then . I must admit that they freak me out. Something like ten or twelve lanes coming from the booths, all trying to merge into two lanes. Aaaggghhh! I usually just put my foot down, yell 'go, go, go' in my best Murray Walker voice and hope for the best!

cruisemum1 · 06/08/2007 09:28

mummydoit - for your dh but well done on conquering fear of MW's ! and I LOVE the name!!
As i said it is the fear of having a panic attack and feeling like fainting more than the road itself. I used not to have a fear of MW travel and frequently had to use them because my paren ts and sister moved to the coast and my dh was at sea and returned to dover fortnightly so i used to troll down there with my mum and dd in the car with no probs. i agree that it will get better the more i do it but i cant get over this overwhelming panic about wot mihght happen.
Elastic - i wish i ws like you with your lov eof dual carriageways. i can do most of the journeys i need to do by A roads and dual carriageways

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expatinscotland · 06/08/2007 09:30

Embrace the freedom and beauty that is motorway driving!

You'll never look back!

Get some good music and hit the road!

cruisemum1 · 06/08/2007 10:30

very positive expat! thanks

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PrettyCandles · 06/08/2007 21:14

Cruisemum, I regret now telling you of my experiences. I meant to show that you can have a terrifying experience or panic attack and get through it, and cope with it. But now I worry that maybe this thread is not so helpful to you. Maybe it's making you dwell on the worrying aspects, and winding you up about your forthcoming trip, rather than helping you to chill and gain confidence.

Perhaps you ought to approach this, prepare for it, like you might prepare for labour. With breathing and calmness, with visualisation of how you would like to move through it and of a happy outcome. With the knowledge that, at the end, you will be flying on endorphins and very pleased with yourself. With making sure that everything is ready so that you don't have a mad panic to pack everything in a final rush.

Does that make sense?

lou33 · 06/08/2007 21:27

cm are you talking about the portsmouth end of the a3?

i passed my test a year ago and havent had any real need to go on a motorway was only a few weeks ago

i've been on 4 times now, it really is ok

if it IS the portsmouth end of the a3, then you dont even realise you are on a motorway, as once on the a3 as a 2 lane road, it just naturally widens, you dont have to make any effort to get on the motorway part iyswim

mummydoit · 06/08/2007 21:58

Cruisemum, thanks for the compliment on my name! It's a phrase I hear so often that I thought it might as well be my name .

One more tip that might help with motorway nerves. Keep up a running commentary on the bad driving habits of other drivers. It distracts you from your nerves, it gives you a huge superiority complex as you realise there are some complete idiots out there who really shouldn't have passed their tests and that you are, in fact, a brilliant driver, plus it keeps you aware of what other drivers around you are doing. And if you see a lady in a red Megane shaking her head in despair at other drivers, it's probably me!

cruisemum1 · 06/08/2007 22:29

thank you all! i will retire to bed and have positive thoughts

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LadyVictoriaOfCake · 06/08/2007 22:33

mummydoit, i also have to do the m25 at rush hour. though this last week its been so so slow compared to normal. so if you see lady in a black tino, looking bored and yawning as she is stuck in traffic between watford and maple cross thats me!

mummydoit · 06/08/2007 22:39

LadyVictoria, we will be there tomorrow morning so I'll look out for you and give you a wave if I see you!

LadyVictoriaOfCake · 06/08/2007 22:42

where are you off to? i've got to go to harefield.

mummydoit · 06/08/2007 22:43

Mount Vernon hospital! Just down the road from Harefield.

LadyVictoriaOfCake · 06/08/2007 22:45

well i might see you there. i drive in via the bottom of the canal by the coy carp pub, but go back the other way past the mount vernon turning.

depending on what time i wake up depends on when i get there. kids might let me sleep late again (hubby is in harfield, so no appointment time)

Twinklemegan · 06/08/2007 22:46

So how do you all trust all the idiot drivers out there? I feel like I need about 10 eyes in the back and sides of my head to keep track of everyone's movements. I'm paranoid that almost everyone is about to cut me up, after I got run off the motorway like I said earlier. Traffic joining is the absolute worst. I panic if I even see one car coming down the slip road. Arrrgh!